Has anyone learnt not to be bothered by neighbour's loud noise (thumping music)?

[FedUpAndTiredToday]

I have the perfect house for me in the perfect place, but the neighbours are becoming a nightmare. I now have all my windows shut when I want fresh air and I just feel so depressed. As soon as the thumping starts my chest tightens and I want to cry. I’ve discussed moving but the house and area is everything we’ve ever wanted and dh says that if we move, then there’s no guarantee that we won’t get noisy neighbours again.

The bass somehow cuts through any type of noise we try to make in our house to drown it out.

What steps have you taken to address this?

Do the neighbours know you can hear their music?

We’ve spoken to them repeatedly. At first they turned it down, now they get annoyed and laugh.

One neighbour opposite last year got so fed up that they okayed loud music on a speaker back to them. They thought it was funny.

I'm looking onto how to complain officially, but am worried about repercussions.

It’s not even that warm today and I’m dreading the summer already.

They moved in a few years ago. They’ve also done building work at all times, but that bothers me less in a strange way (but then you know it won’t go on all night).

Have you spoken to them?

Oh yes.

Next steps would be reporting them officially. What times are they being loud?

Repeatedly. They don’t care. It’s often when he has groups of his male friends around and they play loud music in the garden. I’m female - do you think they listen to me? Dh used to have more luck, but now they just roll their eye, laugh and carry on. What can you do then?

Report to the council. Keep a diary. Make it official.

All times. There’s no pattern, but if it’s nice enough to be in the garden, then they’re playing music. It not even that great today and they’re out. They do stop overnight (they have young children), so they say they’re allowed. But that can still mean 12+ hours of loud music. I worry things will change as their children grow up.

Personal music I could manage - there’s a difference between being outside and hearing others living their lives and them turning up the volume like they do.

Fight fire with fire, play continuous loud music 24/7 it seems counterintuitive at first, you have to be prepared t to go for it though. They got fed up first. To note we tried being reasonable and normal first, they laughed just like your ndn. We laughed last

A few thoughts. Assuming your house are attached, I would recommend soundproofing if you can afford it. Makes a big difference if you shell out for heavy duty stuff.
Keep a sound diary and report. (Are you both owners/renters?)

But honestly, it’s very far from your perfect home now isn’t it. I would look seriously at moving.

Report to the council. And keep reporting. We were in a similar situation and the council have been incredibly helpful. Our council asked us to use the noise app which records the volume. Don’t worry about repercussions either- again the council got involved when we had trouble and things have (fingers crossed) quietened down.

I can’t do that. I can’t be responsible for upsetting other neighbours. I didn’t care when the other neighbour did it, he just laughed. The gardens are connected, not the houses. The music is really loud.

If you're not likely to move, go official and do it through the council. My Mum had an absolute nightmare with her NDN's, and it took such a long time but eventually the council were able to service enforcement notices on them and it stopped.

I agree with moving. Dh doesn't. He hates it as well, but doesn’t want to move. He thinks better the devil you know…

@FedUpAndTiredToday I get what he means but this is miserable for you both. One of the things that makes people feel worse is having no control over their situations. You’ve surely got to try something proactive. 🤗

@FedUpAndTiredToday ah ok I see , you are buggered then unless you move, if they won't be reasonable, and you can't react without upsetting other neighbours then you either have to suck it up or move 🤷 , can't you you get other neighbours on your side they must be pissing other people off if the music is in the garden?

We moved to a semi rural place to get away from the city. There's countryside on two sides, so I hoped it would be more peaceful, but they seem to think that no one else matters. They moved here after us and we’ve put up with all their building work noise without complaint, but this is too much.

All winter, I thought that it’s so peaceful then, that I can cope with a few sunny months and then we’ve had today. At least it’s cool enough to have the windows closed.

I'm going to contact someone tomorrow. I hear what you say about it not being our perfect home anymore, but it could be 😢 Apparently someone else did complain last year, so hopefully we can add our voices to the mix.

Today they keep turning it up loud for a while, then it goes down, then it’s turned up loud again.

That sounds really miserable and I personally believe that there is insufficient noise control in the uk. There is absolutely no excuse for playing loud music that others can hear. Bass speakers are particularly bad as they send out vibrations that you can feel and hear even with all windows shut etc.

I feel so sorry for you OP. I've experienced this in the past and tried everything I could to get used to it. I recognise what you say about the chest tightening thing. To feel intruded upon in your own home is hard to bear. I ended up moving as I thought life was too short to suffer it. There are some selfish bastards out there.

I'm sorry OP, can completely sympathise. We live in a row of terraces and our garden backs onto the gardens of another street of terraces. Some new neighbours moved into the house backing onto our garden and were constantly playing really loud music - you could hear the bass thumping in every room in our house. We aren't even on the same street and have two gardens between us, so I've no idea how their immediate neighbours tolerated it. We tried notes, talking to them, but eventually went to the council, who were better than we expected. The noise has completely stopped now - to the extent I even wondered if they'd moved out, until we heard the music again just the once over Easter.
You definitely need to escalate this. Report every time.

The music stopped some time after 9. So well within the 7am-11pm laws… but still 9 hours of thumping music loud enough to be heard all over the house with the doors and windows shut. Now I’m still feeling the adrenaline- it’s the worry about when it will happen next and how bad the summer is going to be.

To be honest I wouldn't report daytime noise. We had neighbours that played music like this a lot during daytime hours a few years ago, during covid lockdowns. It was really irritating because obviously we were all mostly at home and I was also working at home during that period. However like your neighbours they never did it late at night, and for me night time quiet is the most important thing. I'm a very light sleeper and I dread to imagine my two young children being kept up at night too. Your neighbours sound like arseholes and I'd be concerned that it could get a lot worse if they became vindictive because at least you have quiet during sleeping hours now.

Do you own your house? If you ever move you would have to declare this dispute with your neighbours, could make it hard to sell which would be another nightmare.