Cultural differences in children's birthday parties.

[TheNameIsDickDarlington]

I was recently at a child's birthday party where one of the mums questioned the classic cheese and pineapple on a stick birthday snack. Apparently, she had never seen this before.

This led me to think about children's birthday parties and how much of what I would consider a traditional child's party is specifically cultural to England (which is where I have always lived). Do most countries have the typical Bouncy castle in a hall and buffet food type kids parties or does each country have its own version of that?

@Jegersur

Same. The only time I have had a cheese pineapple hedgehog was at a friend’s 30th birthday party and they were of SE Asian origin. I’ve never been to a bouncy castle party, or been to a town or church hall for a party growing up.

The only children’s parties I have been to as an adult (and they’ve been toddlers so probably more parties for the adults), have been in a park or at the parents’ house. There have been a selection of alcoholic and non-alcoholic beverages, finger food, a cake, and that’s about it!

Cheerios as in the breakfast cereal?! Never seen them at a party.

90s kid

We had cheese and pineapple hedgehogs. Some even had glacé cherries on the stick too.

Party rings dangling from something and you had to eat without using hands

Sigh, maybe they have had their day.

These lovely, appalling things. With cheap tomato sauce.

Though the internet suggests that they're only called cheerios in Queensland and NZ so maybe they are still in existence but called saveloys or something.

Affluent North London area. We moved here from east London a year ago and parties are different even across the city.

East London - some bouncy castles in halls, quite a lot of parties in public parks (not reserved, so no cost), just snack food from supermarkets served, supermarket cake and party bags, the kids just play freely.
North London - very few bouncy castles (we do them for DD's party as DD requests them, but I get the feeling it's seen as a bit childish for 6 yr olds now). Always a hired venue (not cheap in this area even for a church hall). Entertainers and external catering, nothing home made. We've had princess entertainers, disco, pizza making, clay crafts, private cinema hire. Activities are more structured. Cake is generally custom made, party bags are more expensive (sometimes made up by an external company).

No cheese and pineapple. Food is generally fruit pieces, veggie sticks, pizza delivery, popcorn, crisps. Sometimes booze and pastries for adults. People generally turn up on time as the venues are hired for 2 hours, and the entertainment is structured so they'll miss out if they aren't there at the start.

I think it’s worth explaining for non-UK based readers that I think a big reason why the birthday cake isn’t served at the party itself is because there’s usually loads of cakes aside from the birthday cake. Candles are blown out at the end of the party, then everyone is given the cake to go. By that point kids are already filled to the gills with cupcakes, chocolate crispie cakes, butterfly cakes etc.

Yes the birthday tea is a much bigger thing here. Though I've never seen other cakes eg cupcakes served as part of it.

I lived in America (Midwest) for a time and was really puzzled by a couple of party foods - puppy chow and chex mix - i think the chex was a breakfast cereal.

Oh! In SA they're 'little boys' 😂
Yes have seen those!

There were no church hall type parties when I was growing up (80s), parties were generally at home or then you moved to taking a few friends to McDonald’s and sitting in the train (not sure if it was just ours that had a train!). However DH is from a slightly posher background and all his birthday parties were at the village hall.

DD is not yet 4 and the number of church hall plus bouncy castle parties we’ve been to must be in double figures by now. We’ve just done smaller family things (although there’s like 10 cousins so not that small!) at home for her up to now but have booked a church hall ourselves for the next one as she’s wanting to invite some friends from nursery and our house/ garden isn’t really big enough plus I don’t want the stress of people I don’t really know at my house.

I don’t remember them being as themed when I was younger as they are now. DD has got her next ten birthday themes planned out, she’s like ‘I’m going to wear this for my Frozen birthday when I’m 4 but then next when I have a Spider-Man birthday I can wear a red one but then I will have a rainbow birthday after that’ etc etc.

Where my dd 1st and 2nd and 3rd (but lockdown cancelled 3rd) were all hall with bouncy castle and buffets 😂 and all friends and family

Also lived in U.K. whole life /British

4th another lockdown

5th a big fuck off party due to 3&4 being cancelled for friends and family and school friends - think was 45 kids

Party boxes for kids and buffet for adults

Smaller parties now

6th soft play and they did food for kids / 24 kids

7th gym party last month and party boxes 18 kids

Guess I'm very typical 😂😂😂

8th will be less friends again as find smaller friendship groups

Hurrah! I am weirdly glad that kids are still getting them. 😂

North of Ireland I never attended a party in a hall as a child,haven't had my son at any. My sister in England talks about them all the time though.

I have recently heard of a community centre getting a bouncy castle and that you can hire the whole area,possibly will when my sons older,soft play is handy for now.

Lucky you. My DS started in reception last Sept and we have been to 17 parties so far, all bouncy castles in village halls with a buffet. There’s 3 village halls to choose from and all the parties have just blended in to one. Same music too - crazy frog, let it go, shut up and dance.

I’m 44 and exactly the same format of party happened in the 80s too. Exactly the same food too. Cheese and ham sandwiches on white bread, cocktail sausages, party rings, chocolate fingers, pink wafers, Hoola hoops, cheese and pineapple. The only new addition is the arrival of chopped raw carrots and cucumber. This was not a thing in the 1980s. Songs were then Superman, the birdie song and agadoo.

This. I still have the box (now with some game pieces in) from a 1930s wedding.

Pass the parcel is also very English/Bristish in my experience

I'm really glad you've said this actually. My child is at primary school and we've had no party invites at all which really surprised me. I remember non-stop parties at primary school! But this will be the reason. We're in a deprived area and people just don't have the cash for it. Sad for the kids! We've also had no playdate invites and suspect it might be a similar thing. People are just struggling so much day to day, no one has the time or headspace for it.

We did play dates regardless @PollyPeep and they both got some return invites eventually.

Larger parties are usually in a call with a bouncy castle.

Im in London.

I also find these days everyone does something different every year. For example a trampoline party one year, hall party another, gathering at home another year, picnic in the park. Some people do joint parties. It usually depends on if the parents are popular in the early years/care about meeting all the parents. I’ve always done a small do with DDs closest friends and some family.

Also London is so multicultural that you get different kinds of foods at parties as some families invite cousins and grandmas etc.

I went to one hall party whereby the family was vegan and Caribbean - they served hot food and vegan sweets for snacks - for example.

I have never seen pineapple on cheese.

Very different. I’m indonesian and typical birthday party usually have yellow rice shaped like a really high mountain. Its a symbol for the birthday kids to have a good life.

for entertainment se rarely have bouncy castle. We usually have a clown or magic and games.

If the party is somewhere that someone has paid for an allotted time like softplay then I’d be on time. But if it’s at someone’s house then I definitely give any host at least an extra 15 minutes!

Connecticut, USA here

Same as above, pizza delivered and cake eaten at the party, goodie bags, no booze

If not at a venue, in the host’s back garden with a bouncy castle (called a bounce house in the US)

"lovely, appalling things" is the perfect way to describe these. I shudder thinking back on what must have been in them. Then I start craving them like the clappers 🌭

To fairy bread I will add: musk sticks and fantales 🍬

I've got a cultural difference one I'd be glad if someone could enlighten me about. Birthday for early primary school kid from Sikh family who were having a smallish party at home with a few school friends (of which my kid was one) and mostly family members. (I am not Sikh and also not British.) Party was going on for a very long time and cake still hadn't been cut nor happy birthday sung. I was desperate to get home after some hours but it felt enormously rude to leave before singing happy birthday (especially as all the other, evidently savvier, parents of school friends had long since made their apologies - I felt like the kid had to have at least one school friend there to sing to them). At long last cake was cut and happy birthday was sung and we could slip away. Next week standing chatting to birthday kid's mother at school pickup, and she makes a pointed comment (in my direction) about how it had taken a long time to get people to leave! I thought it was an unwritten rule that, in the absence of an emergency or pre-warning the host that you have to leave at a certain time, it was very rude to leave before singing happy birthday and cutting the cake. Was I in the wrong or did this family just not get the memo about the 'don't leave before singing happy birthday' thing?

Seriously?? How old are your kids? I’ve an 8 year old and he’s been to (and held) lots of parties like this

A Russian neighbor was the talk of the steamie as she offered alcohol to the adults at a kids party.