How to improve my reputation at the firm?

[autisticconsultant]

1. Will not tell anyone here what firm it is, where it's based etc. to protect my privacy and stop people from finding out where I am based and complaining about me (snitches!)
2. Recently burnout after sliding off my meds for ptsd caused by sexual abuse and violence from dad and cousin
3. Started job at same time as coming off meds, epic burnout
4. WARNING: contains a lot of technical jargon re autism, so if you don't know much about autism don't read this
5. Just started my career at Company X, had a shit and awful time bc I suffered from burnout, put on a final written warning as the practice I am in is old school and the partner did not believe my underperformance was caused by my autism
6. The resourcing guy then put me on a very unique project that deals with exclusively calling strangers, dealing them ranting at me about their problems with our client, then ends with me recording all of that and trying to solve complex problems too. All my calls are monitored as are no. of customers contacted. If you know anything about autism, you'd know that this not autism friendly
7. The resourcing guy Andy didn't tell the manager on my engagement my autism and in my first week, I almost got thrown off bc Andy didn't understand why I couldn't tactfully deal with clients complaining to me about how shit our client company is without making the client company look bad
8. Eventually, I picked that shit up
9. During my time there, I hit my financial target and chased down the second highest amount of debt ( one of the performance metrics is the amount of money I can secure from debtors)
10. In my final week , unfortunately, I mixed up some exam dates and slid off the project early, but didn't tell the manager until he found out from my counsellor snitching on me... I didn't tell my manager bc by the time I found out it was a mistake, my replacement had already been found anyway
11. The client also complained about me accidentally cc'ing an external customer of theirs into an email chain where they were discussing what they can do about the customer's account ( not much cos the client is incompetent and I know what I did wrong-- I should be more careful re email etiquette next time). This is not a data leak bc the only data they were discussing was the client's data and they were all contactable via email
12. The manager also told me off for deleting some files and then recovering them from the recycling bin … he pointed out it was a wider pattern of me doing things before asking/not informing people of things when they happen/ poor stakeholder management
13. All of those aren't material to the engagement except for the client complaint
14. I had to write my own self-evaluation and send it to manager. I was honest with the points I need to improve on:

Points to improve and how:
a) Refresh Excel data analysis skills by attending courses provided by company
b) Communicate more with senior stakeholders before taking action i.e., know when I am making an important decision and inform the senior stakeholders about it before I take action
c) Stop assuming stakeholders know everything I do so that I can inform stakeholders when I change things i.e., when I changed the statuses of some customer interactions on the spreadsheet over the weekend, I should have informed MANAGER X as he needed to ensure the client reporting was accurate day-to-day; I should have explained to MANAGER X too that sometimes clients promised to pay etc. and then a few days late would email me with a problem they found and refuse to pay, thereby changing their status
d) Strike the right balance between problem solving myself and knowing when to lean on others for help e.g., whilst I have been proactive in reaching out to XX employees to help me, I should have spent more time explaining the issue to them instead so the problem could be solved quicker
e) Enhance ability to make perform well in time-restricted situations i.e. through practice, ensure I do not sacrifice quality when finishing tasks to time restrictions

@autisticconsultant

I'm not a him 🙋🏻‍♀️

The way you have responded to every comment on both of your threads gives that impression. You haven't at any point reflected on any points raised, commented about things you want to change etc. Every reply you've given has been giving the impression of upping the anti / confronting the person who's commented.

You've not offered any further information or help to understand your thought process or perhaps suggested anything you've tried previously to change your ways or working.

You've just gone on a total defensive slant for everything - if you've got any part of you that wants to change your "reputation at the firm" then you really should reflect on the way the majority of posters are getting the same impression of you, it's likely your colleagues may have a similar impression.

It sounds like it’s not the job for you. I wouldn’t say that the person who told that you had ‘slid off the project’ was snitching. Surely someone needed to know?
I hope you find something more suited to you

You are giving the impression of being rude, confrontational and defensive. This communication style is one of the biggest things you need to work on, it seems, and you haven’t mentioned it as something to improve on. I understand that it’s difficult for you, but it is really important. It will help to smooth things over if/when you make mistakes.

Some things on your list, it seems that you don’t understand the seriousness of. Eg, the client email chain - that in itself is a data breach, and would be treated very seriously where I work.

You are rude in the way you communicate and your autism does not excuse this. I’m not surprised you are being pulled up about mistakes at work. Clearly, the job you are in does not suit your skillset.

Reflect on what you are good at and you can manage as someone with autism, and look for a job requiring those skills.

I'm autistic, too, but I'm not rude to people.

I think you may need to find a role where communication skills are a less central part of the job. Yes, the company should be making reasonable adjustments to accommodate you, but it sounds like your skills and behaviour make you fundamentally a poor fit for the role.

I’d focus on securing a role in an area that allows you more scope to succeed.

I’d find it very hard to more forward constructively with an employee who had been dishonest “slid off a project”.

You may be autistic (so am I, so I understand not being able to do small talk) but you're also incredibly rude.

People are trying to help you and you're being rude in every single response.

If you behave like this in the job I'm not surprised you're having problems.

This. OP, your communication style is going to stymie you in any job unless you work on coming across as less rude and aggressive.

Consulting is always going to be people centric. You need to be able to communicate well and build relationships - there is nowhere to hide, even in technical roles. It sounds to me like a role in industry, small-medium sizes company, no client interaction at all, would be a much better fit. This role isn't going to work out OP, sorry.

Strike the right balance between problem solving myself and knowing when to lean on others for help e.g., whilst I have been proactive in reaching out to XX employees to help me, I should have spent more time explaining the issue to them instead so the problem could be solved quicker

Correct me if I'm wrong, but it seems like someone told you that, right? Because it's phrased positively, in the form of a compliment sandwich (compliment then criticise). This is a form of "small talk"!

Instead, what if your boss or colleagues had just told you the truth: "You messed up horribly. You can't make mistakes like that. I don't want to help you. You suck at this job yet your ego is big. Now we all have to fix your mess. Get out of my way, or better yet, quit." (Being brutally honest, from the sound of all your threads, this is their likely thought process!)

What if that's what they said every time you made a mistake on your list? I'm sure you wouldn't feel so good.

I'm sure you have benefitted from some level of kindness and respect in the way your boss/colleagues speak to you. You should treat others how you want to be treated. Do you see the importance of at least trying to not come across so aggressively, even if it doesn't come naturally to you?

As another example, I have ADHD, and my house is a shit tip, but I can't just literally throw papers and files around in heaps all over the office floor when I feel like it. I have to at least try to keep things semi, if badly, organised so my lovely secretary doesn't just die trying to sort out my mess.

I definitely get the whole ND-friendly thing – you'll never be as "polite" and I'll never be as "neat" as non-ND people, and that's 100% fine – but there is value in treating others how you want to be treated.

Your communication style is confrontational and rude rather than clear and direct. I don’t think a role involving stakeholder management (particularly clients/customers) is suitable for you. From what you’ve said colleagues also think you’ve got poor judgement with respect to problem solving.
I’d imagine you’re going to be performance managed and dismissed so it might be advisable to consider your options and start looking for roles more suited to your skill set.

This is an example of a response people find confrontation/rude.

Someone has assumed that you are remote working / only able to ask for help via teams and they have given you a suggestion to help.

Instead of replying thanking the person but saying it isn't relevant because xyz, you just pushed a question back at them (without even saying whether what they assumed was true or not)

Better responses would be for example:
. Thank you for that idea, yes I do work remotely via teams so that might work
. Thank you for that idea, actually I work in the office already, so that can't be the problem
. Thank you for that suggestion, I do work remotely but if I think I need help I tend to phone someone

All these responses are much more polite and constructive, but are still pretty direct.

What roles are more suited to my skillset?

What sort of jobs involve this?

I'm not sure you've understood my point. Why do you think someone would describe you as not being up for debate?

Critical thinking and self assessment seem to be lacking throughout your writing and your description of your work and interactions with people. Do you agree with this?

Yes, how to improve?

You are so combative and rude. You could make a start on improving by not immediately jumping to challenge people who are trying to help.

What are you good at?

Have you been in work yesterday and today, @autisticconsultant ? You seem to be spending a lot of time online so I’m wondering if you’ve been attending work?

I'm on study leave ... revising for my exams

Even: 'I don't use Teams, my colleagues are in the same office so I talk to them in person.' would be better.

OP - have you noticed you demand information from people without giving any yourself? Look at your last few posts for examples - a very abrupt question that people can't answer without details, and you have not given any details.

How can someone know what role you are suited to without knowing anything about your qualifications, interests, strengths or skillets?

We do know you're suited to any job that involves communication or dealing with people.

I can’t believe you’ve started another thread. Learn to say please and thank you, that’s not small talk, that’s the absolute minimum when speaking to another human.

You're aware there are problems, that's a start. Did you understand there were problems before the incident where you copied in the customer? When it's been pointed out to you something was the wrong thing to do, have you changed how you deal with a similar situation afterwards?

I'm not always the best communicator myself and tend to be very work-focused, but softening your responses to people - whatever your immediate reaction is - definitely helps to oil the wheels. As suggested upthread, always thank someone for information they provide, even if you then need to ask for clarification or something more.

When you are in the office, always say hello, ask if anyone wants a drink when you go to get one (unless there's a policy that states otherwise), etc. You need to build a rapport with people. If you're the rude person who only speaks when they need something it will be noticed.

Can you use chat Gbt or similar to help you with your communications?
I work in comms and often use chat gbt to help me things

have you spoken to you hr team about any changes that could be made to support your autism

You have been advised on your many threads to improve your reputation and general experience at work you need to:

Be present in the office if you aren't already, it means you are more visible and is easier to get help and input from
If not in the Office, readily ask for help on Teams

Have a meeting with your line manager, explain what you struggle with, ask for a workplace passport so that you can write down how your autism affects you and what you need in place to support you, any reasonable adjustments that are agreed and then you are responsible for passing that onto new line managers, your line manager will not (should not) pass on any personal information like that.

Ask for clarity before undertaking any tasks. So you are aware of what you are meant to be doing and the aim of the task ie giving students interview practise and helpful feedback.

Use appropriate email etiquette - not forwarding a long thread to customers but starting a new email, starting with a personal greeting not To whom it may concern.

Being open to helpful advice and not being defensive and blunt. Autistic or not you need to improve your communication style and that is something everyone can work on. Otherwise you will always struggle in the workplace.

You could also try using the resources on the Gobin Tools website in watching the tone of what you say.