I’m fed up of my colleague now

[Lilllypad11]

Genrral rant here. Colleague (Jane) is morbidly obese, today, another staff member (Emma) asked her to edit a document. She did it. Then later on, Jane said to the colleague (Emma), “seeing as I’m helping you out can you just go over there (less than a meter) and make me a coffee then pop some water in my pot noodle”

normally I’ll try and be a listening ear for this colleague of mine, but today took the absolute piss. She just doesn’t move, she’s so lazy honestly it boggles my mind and she does herself no favours.

Emma just blindly said yes then later said to me I wish I said no. I did say it’s so hard in a room full of people to say no. What the hell do you do in these situations because Jane’s asked me to do stuff for her at times too and it annoys me.

Me and my colleagues will happily grab each other a coffee if one of us is busy with a task.

You just sound miserable, I'd hate to work with you.

If it's hardly any trouble to do this (going to the kitchen anyway) I don't see why you wouldn't help a colleague who is doing you a favour. If it's inconvenient then just say so.

Ffs OP really?

It would annoy me if it was a regular thing, but that would be regardless of her/his/their weight.

Gosh, fat old Jane and her heinous fat demands, eh?

I don’t think OP is BU completely, just honest.
My DH is morbidly obese and would pay someone to turn a kettle on even a metre away rather than do it himself. It’s quite funny really, but it would be really annoying in a work colleague.

Really?

Trying to give Jane the benefit of the doubt, was doing the extra work putting her under extreme pressure deadline wise? If so, it'd be far enough if someone made you a drink/pot noodle. I'm just thinking years ago I had something landed on me, I said it couldn't be done within time frame, but I had everyone running around after me as it was essentially I stayed at my desk.

Moving forward if you feel this is an ongoing thing you don't want to be involved in, just say you're not planning to move anywhere near the kettle in the next hour or you want to get on with what you're doing, so might be quicker if you did yourself.

Jane, by the sounds of it, was working through her lunch to help Emma and asked for a small return favour to facilitate that.

But because she’s fat she’s not worthy of respect? What is this mentality that fat people should be hated and sneered at? Jane may be obese but people who fat shame are genuinely ugly human beings.

I agree. I’ve never known anyone in the workplace to ask someone else to make their coffee.

What a bizarre complaint. I just made coffee for 4 other people in the office. They could easily have walked to the kitchen in the next room and made their own but I thought I would be nice and save them the trouble. Is this unusual?

it is a inconsequential post.
you are making a big deal out of jane's size.
not a good attitude op.

But were they morbidly obese like Jane? This is clearly the OP’s real problem, with those ghastly fatsos too lazy to wet their own giant Pot Noodles.

Offering is your choice and different from asking someone else to make it for you though.

Very different.

Do you and Emma usually ask favours of people and never expect to do anything in return? Or is it only Horrible Fat Jane you think should do other peoples work for them for no benefit to herself?

Yes @Lilllypad11, don’t do any more favours for Horrible Fat Jane- then next time Emma wants someone to help with her work HFJ can say no, and you and she can do your own work and let Jane do hers.

I think it would be interesting to see, in a a parallel universe, how people would have responded had OP not mentioned Jane's morbid obesity.

Most people are now defending Jane from being fat-shamed.

However, I personally think it was mildly rude and unpleasant of Jane to ask someone to make her a drink and prepare her lunch. I would never ask a colleague to do that, unless we were actually also good friends.

I don't like the transactional nature of Janes's attitude either. I suspect it is effortful for her to stand up and move about, because that is a side effect of carrying a lot of excess weight. But she would rather explicitly manipulate a colleague than acknowledge to herself why she is asking them to do it for her.

If I’d asked someone else to do my work for me I’d be offering to make them a brew as a thank you, otherwise I’d expect it to be ‘no’ next time I asked!

Sorry for the bashing OP, your post doesn’t warrant it, your colleague seems to excessively/systematically rely on you, to trick you into it and it’s not ok

I would set a rota within the office where employees do drinks for everyone once a day and, for the rest of the day, everyone gets their own.

I think it is reasonable to decline to do her noodles and that she can prepare her own lunch during her break/outside of her working hours (and certainly yours). It’s a business after all, you can’t waste working time preparing each other’s lunches.

Also, if she helps you with work, you ’pay’ back with work stuff, you don’t do drinks or noodles or services, that’s not professional either

You surely didn't expect people to support you in your very unkind opinions of your colleague did you?

I think it’s because the OP has chosen to mention it as the only thing worth mentioning about Jane, as though her weight is the key thing about her, and is going to make readers take the OP’s view. I think that if she’d said ‘AIBU to get irritated that a colleague eats smelly Pot Noodles a foot from my desk daily?’ Or ‘AIBU to be irritated that a colleague regularly gets everyone else to make her coffee and never reciprocates?’ Or ‘AIBU to be irritated that a colleague doing a perfectly normal part of our team’s job, editing a doc, uses it as leverage to get other people to make her coffee and heat her lunch?’, then yes, the answers might have been different, but it’s not actually clear whether Jane was doing anyone a favour by editing the document, or whether it was part of her job.

@nfkl lunches.

Also, if she helps you with work, you ’pay’ back with work stuff, you don’t do drinks or noodles or services, that’s not professional either

Perhaps despite her fatness, Jane doesn’t rely on other people doing her job for her?

@VulvaArmy Yes I might offer too.

But what you and others seem to be ignoring is that this isn't a one-off request from Jane. This is a habitual pattern of behaviour.

Somebody upthread said Jane's weight isn't OP's business. But isn't Jane making it her business by needing to frequently ask for help with everyday tasks?

exactly

Yes, and the op has neglected to mention whether her and Emma are routinely asking Jane to do bits of their job for them… from the fact that they don’t see that Jane did Emma a favour in this situation, I think it’s likely that they feel entitled to Jane’s help with their work and object to returning the favour.