What were you doing when you were turning 30?…

[Whatsmyusername1235]

later on this year I am turning 30 and I am dreading it.
what were you doing with your life around the time you turned 30? I am nowhere near where I want to be and I feel like I’ve wasted a lot of years. 30 also sounds so serious all of a sudden whilst being in your 20’s doesn’t seem too bad if you aren’t exactly where you want to be in life.

Living in a shared flat in Hackney with a girl who is still one of my best friends now. I had quite a "glamorous" but not very well paid job (in the arts). My then boyfriend bought me a weekend in Paris for my 30th birthday and proposed to me there. It was a long time ago and I look back at 30 as being the prime of my life. Don't worry if everything hasn't fallen into place yet OP! It really hasn't for most people and 30 is still so young, I promise.

Ah I really feel for you on this, I can relate - at 30 I was on my second redundancy in 6 months, single (and had been for 5 years) hated my pokey house and was fretting daily that my biological clock was ticking and I would never have children! Please have faith that things will happen in their own time and try not to compare yourself to a) other people and b) what you think you should be doing. I turn 38 next month and am loving the company I have worked for for the past 7 years, have been with my partner for three years (we are parents to a wonderful 4 month old boy!) and have long since upgraded my "pokey" house lol. 30 is still so young to feel like you need it all figured out, just enjoy the here and now and try not to worry, because at 40 you'll wonder why you did and will likely feel like 30 was such a less serious time!

Training to be a doctor and planning for a big trip to South America

Was so young and care free

Had lived in our first home for 9 years. Had been married for 7 years. Was trying to start a family by the age of 30.

30 is so young!

I was two months’ pg with DC2 when I turned 30.

Just had my last child (4th) and completing my degree. However, 5 years later I've just finished my first year of my second degree.

I think my life just started at 30. An it's bloody great 😃

20 years ago so... I'd been married for 5 or 6 years, my kids were 3 and 4 ish and had both been DX with autism by then. I was doing all the early intervention therapies, plus physio for my elder son for his erbs palsy and fighting the LA to support them.
Me and my husband were running a business together.
It was fucking exhausting.

Fucking hell. I was 30 twenty years ago
I just read my first post back again and .. wow.

Part of me can't believe it.

Twenty years

Where the fuck does the time go?

We bought our first house when I was 27 and had my first baby when just turned 29. At 30 I was about to go back to work after mat leave as a secondary school teacher. Dh had just got his first GP partnership. We were in a good position, it was a few years before my health started to deteriorate and so we were enjoying life.

30 is young! You have achieved a lot by having 2 children.
You have plenty of time ahead of you to focus on other areas, it’s all in your hands.
i had just had my first child so was caught up in that more than anything as I was on maternity leave. I’ve changed careers twice in the following 20 odd years!

I achieved loads the year I turned 30.
It was my goal to start my 30s a healthy weight so I was in a health and exercise kick and was looking the best I ever had and a size 10.
I also wanted to learn to drive and passed 3 months after my 30th.
I also wanted to start a degree after leaving 2/3 of the way through my last one and I did that too on my birthday week with the OU.
I inherited a fairly considerable amount of money (grandparents death they were well into their 90s) and was able to buy a small flat and be mortgage free.

I'm approaching 40, put on a tonne of weight and a size 18 due to being sedentary due to the OU degree and various other reasons so on a health kick again to get back to where I was back then.

Travelling and working as I went/needed to. The day of my 30th I had a couple of morning (scuba) dives, went to the outdoor bar at lunch and a chef, retired from 5-star places and living on the island, made me a cake. The cake wasn't cooked properly in the middle 🤣 then for dinner a group of friends and I went to an insanely good restaurant. A little later I settled long enough to get my masters, will be away again soon!

I was teaching in London, broke, living in a house share and in a long relationship. Two years later I was in another city, still teaching, single and saving up to buy a house.

Much more has changed since then as it was several decades ago!

Marriage and babies was not on my radar whatsoever.

30 was a good time for me.

Gosh my youngest is 32..
Eldest is 40.
I'm 66.. when l was 30 l was in hospital recovering from broken hips and pelvis and fractured ribs and cheekbones and jaw. Broken leg.. broken ankle.. broken collar bone .. broken hand.. on a life support machine .. after my ex bf threw me under a bus.. he got jailed for attempted murder.. l had been drugged gang raped two years b4 l met him and someone told him ld had a gang bang..
Don't wish your life away.
I recovered.. still disabled.. but had my wonderful second daughter.. my family are my life.
I've traveled the world . I've made the best of the things.
Have wonderful friends..
Yes I'm still having counselling and operations..
But 30 is not old.. do what makes you happy.. if doesn't make you happy... don't do it.

I’m 30 in less than a week. I’ve been married for 5 years, have a 2.5 year old son, trying (and failing!) for our second child for two years now, we run our own business (have done for 10 years) and we live in a lovely little house. Life’s pretty good, overall.

I think this depends entirely on the way you look at it:

At 30 I had no partner, no children, not even a hint of either.

Equally, my career was in a great place and I was doing well money wise.

Most people can't have done all those things by the age of 30 - there's simply not enough time. There's plenty of time after 30 to get to the bits that haven't got to the top of the list yet.

I was unemployed, following redundancy, and struggling with my mental health. I did have a birthday party which was partly fun and partly stressful! A few months later, I started a voluntary role that eventually turned into a paid job that I enjoyed (and I'm still working for the organisation). I do remember at the time feeling that I was a bit of a failure because I didn't even have a job let alone a good one!

A lot of things can change, OP. I think your 20s are for trying things out, and maybe failing or just finding that things haven't worked out, and learning. Your 30s can be when you find your feet a bit more. And generally the older you get the more sure of yourself you'll feel.

Try not to be hard on yourself and just celebrate yourself!

Recovering from an unpleasant instrumental delivery two weeks before and trying to make sure my two year old didn't kill the baby, to whom she'd taken an instant dislike (30 years on, they still aren't best buddies). I'd probably already started going into work and doing admin tasks because I felt guilty about being on maternity leave.

You are so young OP. Everything is ahead of you.

At 30 I had just emigrated - was still so so homesick. I got a temporary job - but not in my professional area. I had given that up to emigrate for dh's job. We didn't own a car. We rented an apartment and owned a bed, a futon, a table and four chairs.

That temporary job turned into an interesting career with lots of travel and my then boss and his wife became two of my closest friends- especially him. We have a lovely home now, reared three great kids. There are so many good things ahead of you.

Living with my boyfriend at the time in small terraced house which we owned . Relatively happy in my career as teacher. It all went pear-shaped when he buggered off with someone he met a few years later…..

At 30, I had been married 5 years, and was running around after 2 pre-school children, working as a GP receptionist 2 days a week, and a bit frazzled and quite tired. (But happy!)

Was living with my dickhead ex and working in hospitality on an extended career break/ gap, earning shit money.
Now a homeowner with a lovely partner earning ok money and living comfortably.

SAHM and we were struggling financially which was putting a strain on our relationship. A low point, definitely. The milestone birthday barely registered because of the other stuff. Everything got much better in time.

I was just beginning my open university degree, having left school at 16 with no qualifications.

If you have little kids it's a whole other thing! I remember those years as just a blur sort of trying to survive! I think people totally underestimate what it's like and how hard it is, especially if you don't have a lot of help - like I didn't!