Inner monologue - do you have one?

[Dipsydoodlenoodle]

I'm nearly 40 and about 5 years ago learned about aphantasia. I've never been able to visualise, if someone said picture a red ball all I can see is grey. Nothing, no matter how hard I try.

A few weeks ago I'd seen a post on Facebook about an inner monologue - again I can't "hear" a voice or anything - it's just empty with thoughts of what I need to do. I didn't realise that an inner monologue was an actual real thing.

Do you all have one and what is it like?

No, but I have a constant song playing in my head. It changes all the time. Today it’s Dancing In The Street by Lionel Ritchie.

I have an inner monologue that never bloody shuts up. It drives me absolutely insane and causes insomnia most nights.
I would absolutely love to not have constant waffling between my ears.

@thejollytrolleydolly It's Young Adult fantasy, alternate history stuff. My first book is set in the 19th century in a pseudo London. The second is 18th century Mongolia.

@TheBirdintheCave amazing! I've always been a big lover of books and reading 😊 I have always wondered. When you write a novel. Do you have a pre plan of the beginning middle and end and how the characters intertwine or do you just start writing and make it up as you go along? X

Yes, I have one but it's not the same as some of the other PP's!

Mine isn't constant, and it's a mix of words and imagery (e.g. like a film). I had a massive realisation that not everyone has what I have a few years ago - I was watching a series (The Shannara Chronicles) and I visually recognised the tree from my memory of reading the books as a child!

I'm also deaf, and use both speech and sign language, so I suspect this is why I have a mix of words and images!

@thejollytrolleydolly Mine started as an idea inspired by a song and a scene followed. The plot just sort of revealed itself as I wrote. I sort of have a rough idea of where I'm going but I don't plot everything before I start or I'd never start! Lol.

@TheBirdintheCave oh wow that's really interesting! Thank you for sharing 😊 I do love to hear where people get ideas from. I reckon I could probably turn some of my dreams into stories if I were any good at writing because some of them are insane 😂

Wow - I read about people who don't have an internal monologue and it blew my mind!

Yes, I have a very active internal monologue. I have songs going around my head most days. I have conversations with myself in three languages. I'm constantly talking to myself in my head, figuring stuff out, replaying conversations or thinking about how a conversation with someone might go, thinking through how to have difficult conversations and how to phrase things, thinking through the plot of a book I'm reading, thinking about the project I'm working on and what I need to be doing next, planning a shopping list - in other words there is a constant running monologue in my head. I can't imagine what my life would be like without it.

How can you not imagine a red ball??? 😲

@LipstickLil https://aphantasia.com/what-is-aphantasia/

I fit under hypophantasia I think. I can just about picture the object but it's not vivid at all.

I’ve been watching lots of videos lately about people with aphantasia and no internal monologue. I find it fascinating.

I can see and hear in my head and can’t imagine not being able to. As others have said, it’s just like a conversation but silent. If I went to meet a friend in a cafe for example, I might say to myself as I walk in, “I wonder if she’s here yet? Hmm, can’t see her. I’ll go and find a table. That one over there maybe…” But it’s all in my head.

@OneWildNightWithJBJ It sounds quite exhausting! 😅

In the same situation I would probably say out loud 'I wonder if she's here yet?'

Yeah. I have a monologue, music, conversations with myself. All sorts. But then I have ADHD so it goes with the territory.

At night I have to wear noise cancelling headphones and listen to an audiobook that I know well so I can zone out and sleep and not "listen" to all the chatter!!

@TheBirdintheCave haha, I suppose so! Yes, you saying it out loud is what I gathered people did from the videos I watched. I guess I can’t imagine just saying something without thinking about it first.

For aphantasia, people often said they would think in concepts, so they would know a ball is round, they just couldn’t see it.

I have synesthesia and find this kind of stuff really interesting.

I find this really fascinating and I'd love to ask @Dipsydoodlenoodle and @TheBirdintheCave a few questions if you don't mind?

If you can't imagine inanimate objects, like a red ball, can you imagine people? So if I said Queen Elizabeth II, can you see an image of her in your head, or what can you imagine instead?

You said with reference to the red ball that all you see is grey - grey like fog?

Also, if you were asked to describe someone - say your DC or your DM or a person you know - would you do it by just remembering what they look like in the way that you might remember the description of someone from a book? Because if you said to me 'Describe your DC' I'd see them in my mind's eye and describe them from that image I'm holding in my head.

Man these are hard to answer 😂

It's like looking at a faded blurry picture. I KNOW what the former queen or a red ball should look like but it's not clear at all.

@OneWildNightWithJBJ Described it as thinking in concepts and I think that's a really good word for it. I think 'round' or 'red' rather than seeing the actual thing.

As to descriptions of someone, yes I'd say exactly like a description from a book. I know my son has a dimple, blonde hair and blue eyes but I don't need to make a picture of him in my head to describe him nor does one happen automatically.

I'd have been fired from every job I have ever had if I didn't have a good think about some things I felt driven to say.

My monologue in my own head is what I'm doing so I don't forget, mostly!
I can visualize a red ball or a face of someone I know about almost instantly. If someone said ' think about Suggs from Madness ' I can conjure up an image of his face or him dancing around / singing and so on and I haven't seen him on television or as part of the group in a long time
( only an example there)
I can recall things that have happened to me on the past and even what I wearing ( if it was a significant thing or event )

I don't have any pictures in my head at all.

If I try to see a red ball or one of my children's faces I can't see anything it's like when a TV screen is just static.
I could describe what a red ball looked like and logically I know what my kids look like but I can't see them in my head.

I do have an inner monologue though, I actually argue with myself in my head sometimes, there's always some song that I only know a few lines of going around in there.
My inner voice is often pretty mean to me 🙁

My inner monologue never shuts up. I probably need to meditate more!

Does anyone else get that thing when you first wake in the morning... a brief moment of calm before the voice kicks in? I love that momentary feeling and can almost feel my blood pressure rising as soon as I start thinking.

This
Me and my guy are like that

I never shut up in my head. I am typing this slowly and awkwardly on my phone, I am saying my my head the words as I am typing slowly.

I also have an episode of the office running in my head at the moment, a monologue a about a massive worry I’m going through and all sorts of shit, imaginary conversations and a run through of something I’m going to at dds school later.

I also have an imaginary life which is so much better than my real one running at all times.

I envy people with empty heads. Mine annoys me terribly.

Yes!

God, I piss myself off.

My 'imaginary life ' is much better than my real one is!

So interesting to hear how other people experience the world. You always imagine that everyone else is just like you are, but we're all so different. I find it fascinating!

It's knowing but without any sense of articulation. Even as I type, the words flow from a thought without forming somehow. Hard to describe.

I also can't imagine future conversations. I just can't do it. I can write them down or draw them but can't rehearse them in my head. I find listening to words very tiring, I really have to concentrate and will usually write down what is being said to help keep my attention. I can drift out when someone is mid sentence, much to DH's annoyance. I love spoken word podcasts but will have to constantly rewind bits to catch it all. I can play music in my head though, and can have a good song going for days at a time. Not so much lately but that's because I have been podcasting in the car more than the radio.

When I daydream it's almost always in the future and highly visual.