Someone is booking restaurants in my name and with my phone number. Is there anything I can do about it?

[You4coffee]

For about the last six weeks, someone has been making large bookings (8-10 people) at restaurants in my name with my phone number and when I don't turn up the restaurant rings me. They have my full name and phone number. And are obviously put out that they've lost a booking.

They seem to be genuine restaurants, all over London. I live in London but don't particularly know any of the areas or individual restaurants.

I wasn't particularly concerned but it seems to be increasing. It was one a week for a while but this week I've had at least one phone call a day.

I can't think of anyone who'd have a vendetta against me but it does feel personal! And I feel bad for these restaurants that are mostly small local businesses rather than large chains.

Had anyone experienced anything like this? Is there anything I can do? There doesn't seem much point in changing my phone number or reporting to anyone?

@BusyMummy001

It could well be a close contact that’s doing this.

my close contacts on my personal number would be well over 100 as I use my personal phone for work purposes and my number is on my email signature.

As others have said changing your number is easy - sorting all the associated stuff would be a nightmare.

My brother & I faced a similar thing when his wife died and we were arranging the funeral. We went to the funeral directors in the morning and during the car journey back home we discussed where to have the wake as brother wanted it local to where we live. My brother said he'd make a few phone calls that afternoon to check capacity and costs etc.
Later that afternoon my brother called round to ask me if I'd been making calls, booking venues for the wake. I confirmed that I hadn't he said someone had. We checked all the venues in a 10 mile radius and at every single one a woman had called early that afternoon and booked it for the afternoon wake.....in my sister-in-laws name. So whoever it was was pretending to be my dead Sil. What was worse was that none of the venues would cancel the fraudulent bookings as they may have been 'genuine'.
In the end we went to our nearest nice hotel with a copy of Sil's death cert and convinced them to cancel the original booking and paid in full immediately to secure the booking - as a precaution we put a password on the booking so that it couldn't be cancelled.

We strongly suspected a particular person who is a relative by marriage who wasn't told the funeral details directly but would have been told straightaway by another person in the family who'd been told that morning. As to why they did it - who knows? They booked at least 20 venues and my brother had to field calls from some of the venues the week of the funeral asking for confirmation/payment because they'd been given his number to contact so he had people calling asking to speak to his dead wife.

The person we suspected is a very bitter person by nature but we had to admire their determination to spoil the funeral of someone who was genuinely lovely and much missed. My brother decided to just let it go but neither of us have spoken to this person since and they actively avoid us anyway.

But as a PP said, the restaurant should text to confirm all reservations. This would easily stop the problem. Hopefully they will start doing this. Perhaps the OP could suggest it when they ring her.

You can easily spoof phone numbers. Fraudsters do it with bank phone numbers to commit fraud.

If you receive a text in the same text chain as genuine bank texts, it could still be a fraud.

That is horrendous. Seriously unhinged.

I had similar about 10 years ago. I started getting phone calls from people wanting to buy various used cars from me. It turned out someone had been listing used cars with my name and phone number. I was pretty sure it was someone in the village (some very nasty people around here - I'm abroad and some of it is to do with xenophobia). So I posted on social media that I was going to the police with a log of all the incidents and that the person who was doing it should stop immediately.
Never happened again...

So I would definitely post on your social media. It might frighten someone off.

Have a think about who it could be. Have you had a small disagreement with someone? Is there someone who could be jealous? Could it be someone at work?

It doesn’t even have to be that calculated. Not every restaurant will have a call display phone. Even if they do, it’s easy to withhold a number from a landline. It’s also not necessarily unusual for someone to ring from one number, but give another as a contact number (for example, calling from a landline or work phone, but giving your mobile as the contact number).

I’ve been asked several times when booking something by phone “Is the number you’re calling from the best one to contact you on?” It usually is, but sometimes I’ve called from work or, in the days when I still used it, the landline and have given the mobile as my contact number. No one has ever questioned it - because why would you? Most people booking tables in restaurants aren’t doing it to con someone.

It is definitely someone who can't stand you but sometimes you just don't know who it is.

A best friend of mine who was known for being a bit of a drama queen and always attracted drama in her life, went through a stage where she had pizzas and takeaways she hadn't ordered being delivered to her house, taxis turning up when she hadn't ordered them and catalogues and brochures being delivered when she hadn't ordered them. A few of them were for Ann Summers type places and she had 2 younger children at the time. My friend had got into a new lesbian relationship though recently (she had had a few of those) and she thought it was one woman, who wasn't an ex of hers but had accused her of flirting with her girlfriend more than once (my friend probably did do this to be fair). My friend at the time confronted her because this went on for about a year along with silent phone calls withholding the number. This woman denied it all and my friend was never quite sure it was her or not. One day though, the mask of the person slipped, she suddenly spoke on the phone after being silent and my friend screaming down the phone demanding to know who it was and my friend gasped and said "Celia is that you?". Turned out it wasn't the woman she thought it was but another woman she'd fallen out with a couple of years ago who'd moved hundreds of miles away and was actually friendly with my friend. It wasn't even a big falling out as they'd made up. She admitted everything amazingly which I thought was brave but a bit stupid as I knew what my friend was like (could be violent). My friend spoke to her and said "I won't do anything now ,but if this doesn't stop right now, I'm going to the police and getting you charged with harassment". My friend had kept a written log of all the deliveries (she showed it to me, just in a notebook) with dates and everything. From that day forward it all stopped. Apparently someone else also had a word with her and told her this could affect her career (she was a paramedic) if she was found out and reported to the police.

They could for mobiles but not landlines. But yes it's a shame they need to have to do this but might improve things for them.

My MIL would totally do this to me, lol. Hope she doesn't read this and get any ideas.

So weird. A woman who has a crush on your husband? One of your husband's exes?

If you can be bothered, might be worth emailing local restaurants (assuming you live in a town not London) and warning them this is going on. Just write a blanket email, copy and paste it and use google maps to find all their websites and email addresses.

Well, they could ring for landlines.

Sorry but did you even read the opening post? The OP literally says she lives in London.

I had something vaguely similar (over two decades ago), via mail though - started to get loads of samples/catalogues for random things. One company send me samples that must’ve cost them a fair amount to send out so I contacted them about it and they send me the handwritten request form for it.

It was FIL.

DH and I went round with it and asked him why (MIL clearly knew what he had been up to as well) - the excuse was I once said I liked getting things in the post. We (it was all addressed to me though) explained the many reasons why this wasn’t ok. I think he was bored and thought it was funny.

Hope you get get it to stop soon OP.

This definitely is some sort of vendetta.
Sometimes unhinged people, can sit on things for years - so they are not suspected of doing it.
Whilst it's very petty and annoying, it's unlikely to escalate in to anything more. Theres a limit to what they can do with your name and number and after awhile they will get bored of it. I would probably change my number and only give it out to those who I know/actively am in contact with.
It should stop it, as the perpetrator will not have your new number or if they do, it will look too obvious if it starts up again.

I worked with someone once (and socialised briefly with her) and she thought it was hilarious to order pizzas for delivery to random houses. At the time. deliveries were paid in cash. No wonder this practice stopped.

I never knew why she did it. She used ring people who were selling in local papers too, and spend ages asking them random questions about whatever they were selling, and after twenty or thirty minutes laugh and hang up. She must have been in her late 20s at the time.

She didn’t have a grudge or even know the people. She was just really strange.

That’s insane and horrible.

google the number and also see if it is linked to any social media accounts someone is being nasty. If you know it is a woman and someone that has your number it could even be someone from your past. It may be someone that has your number only otherwise I think you would be getting taxis sent anything to be annoying. I would not mention it to anyone yet you can buy a burner phone and ring the number when around people you know. If it has only been happening for six weeks I wonder what happened for you to be on the mind of this person. Sounds like someone that could be jealous of you or someone in your household for something its scary to think that someone would be so petty.

Could be especially as it is just restaurants someone with a grudge would be booking hair/beauty appointments etc.

What number, though? The hoaxer is giving out OP's number, so she already knows who rightfully has that number!

This is the same as some clever scammers who spoof your own email address as if their scam/spam came from you, so that you can't block your own email address.

Have you had a to-do with a neighbour about parking, OP? We have a nasty neighbour who likes to make trouble about where we park - even though he has a massive drive for his own two cars - he's even left us a threatening note claiming that he actually owns part of the public road.

I could imagine him doing something like this, if he thought about it, and had our full name(s) and number(s).

Do you have a van or a shop (or even just a business card) that displays your name and number?

I agree that this is also a truly nasty thing to do to the restaurants themselves - they may well turn down genuine diners who would otherwise have spent a lot of money with them at a table that ends up being empty for hours.

I used to get pizzas and take aways sent to my house when my now ex was “working extra night shifts” - it was his ow’s way of letting me know she existed.

Has your husband that you don’t have the energy to sleep with been to any of these places and could his dinner partner be letting you know she exists?

So over 6 weeks it's been about one a week and then about one a day for several days? So say about 8 -12 restaurants? That's a LOT of effort to go to for just a 'prank'. It's pretty creepy and I'd be quite weirded out and concerned it could escalate. The police will do zero investigation so whilst reporting it now is a good idea in case things get worse they won't do anything to stop it.

So I'd do my own sleuthing.

I'd make a detailed list of all the restaurants and mark them on a map and look for some kind of pattern. Is there a geographical link, are they the kind of places a young person would go to, or a family, or an older person? Are they cheap or expensive? Are they the current top 10 neighbourhood restaurants in eg the Daily Mail or the Guardian or whatever? Are any of them near where someone you know lives or works? The first ones could be particularly significant, the later ones less so as the perpetrator has to widen their picks. The perpetrator could be choosing utterly random places but then you'd expect to see at least some big chains in there.
When and how were the bookings made, what day, what time. Is it someone making phone calls late at night drunk? Or is it Bitter Brenda from work in her lunch break after the boss praised you in that morning meeting?

This was a really extreme case featured on Radio 4 a few days ago and I'm not suggesting it could turn into something as awful as this but it could be someone completely unexpected. In this case the perpetrator, a man, had been the woman's 'best friend' for years, someone she was really close to, confided in and didn't suspect at all.
https://www.bbc.co.uk/programmes/m001xvfh

Thanks for the link @DetectiveMac , interesting and well crafted podcast. Maybe edit your post to remove the spoiler?!