how many missing people do you know of in real life?

[notnowmarmaduke]

Just wondered - we are always saying how common it is, but how many of us know many missing people? Of course you might be closely associated with a missing person and not know it, as people don't necessarily talk about it, or might just not know themselves.

I have only known two people reported as missing, long term. one friends father, who was the classic went out for a pint of milk and was never seen again. ( 30+ years now). One runaway teen never found (15+ years)

Apart from that I have known a few runaway teens who were found, and two people reported as missing who I know went into witness protection

Also, have you ever been reported missing?

When I was mid twenties I thought about going missing. I was struggling with someone that would bring a massive amount of shame to my family and myself, and couldn't see a way out. I very nearly booked a one way flight and ran off to start a new life.

I confessed this to my Mum about 10 years later. She was horrified and said it would have completely broken her. I'm glad I never follow through with this, but I almost did..

I know one, my BIL. Apparently he was involved in drugs/rave scene back in the 90s and got in trouble with the police (not really sure of the whole story, my DH is 12 years younger than him so what happened was hidden from him at the time)

My in-laws couldn't deal with what happened, they are very law abiding people etc so my BIL just left the area and had no contact with them. I presume they never tried to contact him either.

Fast forward to about 2006, he gets in contact again. Where he's been in the intervening years we don't really know. If my in laws knew, they didn't tell my DH (as a family they are terrible at communicating) I then finally met him at a family celebration where it was clear to me that he'd had some history with drugs etc. He was so different from the rest of the family and my FIL especially didn't seem to know how to talk to him. He then disappeared again and no one has heard from him since.

We know where he was living but there is no trace of him online. I wonder whether he changed his name. The saddest thing is that my FIL died a couple of years ago and obviously my BIL doesn't know. And because of the lack of communication issue, no one dared say to my MIL about trying to find him to tell him. I've no idea if she would want to see him again but I can't imagine as a mum not knowing where my child was and not wanting to see him again.

I also worry about the future, if he's not already dead, at some point the shits going to hit the fan and it's really going to upset my DH. He loved his big brother and I think he's never really dealt with the whole issue.

I’ve been reported missing numerous times. The police eventually gave my brother a warning for wasting their time. Not wanting contact is not the same as missing.

I never ever share any missing posts except official police ones on social media. And often share the police post saying about only giving information about people to the police rather than random people online when I see other people doing the whole “A woman that looks a bit like that is staying in a flat at 1 The Road. Always different people staying there every week! Always women as well” as people really do not think!

My brother went missing in his early 20s. For 12 years.

He had just got on a freighter as a "kitchen boy", got off in Gibraltar, married a local woman, had 2 kids and was happy. They decided to move to the UK and had a "Hi mum" moment, where my mum almost had a heart attack. She never really forgave him, but enjoyed her grandkids nonetheless.

this

Yes. Of course you’re right. But I’d still do it.

I have had two cases of people who went missing in my very long life, and neither ended well.

My next-door neighbour's sister went missing and her car was later found at a local beauty spot near some cliffs. They never found her body but she was declared dead a few years later having committed suicide.

The second case was awful. A distant family member disappeared without a trace on their way to work one day. They were not seen for many years despite numerous "sightings," but sadly their body was found hidden in a derelict house and they had been murdered. The suspected murderer had committed suicide long after their disappearance so the family never got any answers or justice.

Both are incredibly sad stories and very distressing for everyone.

Just one a few years ago. An elderly man who went for a walk one evening and never returned. The whole community searched for him for weeks but he was never found.

OP are you a cop? I can't think of any other reason you would know about people going into witness protection. I hope your computer is well protected.

@SignoraVolpe OMG the sins of my auld city! that's horrific ! Glad I left.Poor woman.

A guy I worked with went missing for 6 months before they found him in a river round the corner from his home, really sad. Other than that I've not known anyone else to go missing in real life

A school friend of mine went missing on a night out. They found his body in the river a few months later but aren't sure whether it was an accident, murder or suicide.

what was the outcome? Was she found?

A school friend’s sister’s husband went off to work one day as normal, and that was the last anyone saw of him.

A friend’s brother ran away from home in the north east in his teens. Police weren’t interested. Friend randomly bumped into him sitting on a bench in London about a decade later. He reconciled with the family.

I've known of 3.
First a friends neighbours young child went missing and was later found dead of natural causes in the woods.

Second at school a mates sister went missing ( high profile case) . We had police knocking on our doors and someone I worked with after school was questioned as he looked like the dodgy photo fit . Her bones were eventually found and it's believed she may have been another victim of a prolific murderer.

Third a villager disappeared and his body was found in a river ( suicide)
All of them so sad.

If we're talking temporarily missing -- two. My mother, for two weeks, in her 40s; and my sister, for over a week, at a similar age.

Both have bipolar disorder and neither seemed quite sure what they'd been doing once found.

A lot of these are people who only were missing for a short time, or people who are out of touch, rather than reported missing. Counting people like that, I know quite a lot more. Lots of people who die unexpectedly or by suicide are missing for a while before being found. I have known probably 3 or 4

• including a colleague who just stopped showing up for work and never contacted us to say what was wrong. Found dead at home a few weeks later ( stroke)

and a close relative missing for a few hours, which was short but very scary - He was a student, and his car was found submerged in a local river, so there was a massive hunt on for him. Turned out he had gone a pub with friends then left his car to go and crash on a close by friends settee as he had drunk more than intended. He was going to collect his car the next day, but it was stolen in the night. He had no idea his car was in the river, and the city police were sending divers in looking for him, and his parents had been told.

False alarm for us, but somebody's child was in that driving seat when it went in, no idea who, or what happened to them. Obviously a car thief, but I still hope they didn't die. Of course they could still be in that river somewhere, and be somebody else's missing person

This was a lovely thing to do! You'll never know for sure, but your act of kindness could be what enabled this chap to reconnect with his family. xXx

2, 1 volunteering in a war zone, 1 backpacking in Thailand. Both presumed dead unfortunately.

When I started reading this thread, I thought I only knew of one, but then remembered another two.

The first was a classmate when we were 14. He'd been drinking with friends and never made it home. His body was found a week later; he lived in the country and it looked as though he'd tried to take a shortcut home over fields, then either fallen over, or stopped for a rest. It was November, there was a hard frost and he'd died of hypothermia.

The second was a relative who had been on holiday. Her father was waiting at the airport to meet her but she didn't come off the plane. He reported her missing. She had taken ill abroad and the police abroad were trying to identify her when the missing notice reached them. It all ended well.

The third was the husband of a former classmate. They seemed to have a very happy family life and he just took off. His family were distraught. Nine months later he phoned to wish his son a happy birthday, was amazed and relieved that they were desperate to have him home, and he came straight home. He'd been in Europe, doing cash-in-hand casual work. Big splash in the local news about the happy ending, but they split up a year or so later.

One of my dad´s best friend´s nephew, I actually met him as a kid. He disappeared when he was 13 never to be seen again. Presumed dead. Been missing for nearly 40 years now. Made national news in Spain at the time.

Gosh that's awful

One was a teenage girl who was sadly found murdered. Her attacker committed suicide.

The other was a middle aged man suffering depression which was a deemed a suicide. He was found in dense bushes on a local common.

My friend’s brother did. He went to Australia and in some weird coincidence needed an electrician who happened to be another expat from his old school. This triggered a reunion of sorts but I don’t think they have much contact.

A family whose daughter vanished in a cruise ship. Like them I think she was probably assaulted and murdered. Workers are more vulnerable than you like to think on big ships.

Had to report one of my children missing three times all when around 10-12. Police response was impressive each time. Found safe each time and police very kind and understanding of situation which was rooted in SEN issues.