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Original poster

Is it really strange for a mum to share a bed with her adult sons once in a while?

77 replies

Amiaweirdos · 02/04/2024 21:32

It's not an everyday thing, but once in a while.
Usually the youngest (23 years old)
This week said mum and 27 year old son shared a bed as they were travelling to see family and there weren't enough beds for everyone. It would have been the sofa for one of them otherwise.

Is it really weird ?

OP posts:
Dacadactyl · 02/04/2024 22:12

I'd not mind top and tailing with my son when he's an adult. Think he'd probably reckon it was weird though. I would think it was odd to sleep same way up as each other with opposite sex child.

Wouldn't think twice about sleeping next to DD as an adult.

icelollycraving · 02/04/2024 22:15

I do find it unusual.

IHateLegDay · 02/04/2024 22:16

It gives me the ick

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YireosDodeAver · 02/04/2024 22:16

I would far rather have the sofa than share with an adult son. It's difficult to say under what circumstances It's definitely ok because in many mother-son dynamics even if you said it would be fine if both are happy, it would be difficult to be sure than one or other wasn't feeling subtly pressured to agree

GreenSmithing · 02/04/2024 22:20

Can you imagine dating a 23 year old, and them telling you that they not infrequently shared a bed with their mum?

I'm afraid I would be thinking at the very least that this was a family with all kind of boundary issues and would not be keen to take things further.

JamSandle · 02/04/2024 22:21

Not at all. I used to jump in separately with mum and dad. So comforting.

JamSandle · 02/04/2024 22:21

GreenSmithing · 02/04/2024 22:20

Can you imagine dating a 23 year old, and them telling you that they not infrequently shared a bed with their mum?

I'm afraid I would be thinking at the very least that this was a family with all kind of boundary issues and would not be keen to take things further.

In all my relationships I've never told them I've jumped in with my parents from time to time, so they wouldn't need to know.

Purplecatshopaholic · 02/04/2024 22:22

That is weird AF and gives the absolute ick just thinking about it, lol - would not even have considered it and would have used the sofa automatically.

weegiemum · 02/04/2024 22:22

We had to do this at MIL's house before we got married. She wouldn't let us share the spare (double) bed and insisted dh slept with her. We were pretty traditional in 1994 and didn't move in together until we were married. Partly because of his upbringing.

He hated it but we just didn't visit that often.

stitchinguru · 02/04/2024 22:30

I think the people who think it is ‘weird’ are weird…
Quite sinister to think that sharing a sleeping space is inappropriate.
My adult son is gay - does that make any difference??

ODFOx · 02/04/2024 22:33

It shouldn't be weird but I'm a sleep talker, snorer, drooler and (very much) a sleep spooner. All my adult DC, female and male, know better than to run the risk of waking up with me clinging to them like a limpet while alternately snuffling/snoring/drooling down their back/neck.

Bananabredd · 02/04/2024 22:33

DietrichandDiMaggio · 02/04/2024 21:53

Why do you think it's weirder than sharing a bed with a parent of the same sex though? It's just sleeping a couple of feet away from your parent.

Show quote history

don't be silly

IloveAslan · 02/04/2024 22:37

I think it's weird but each to his own. However, I would be taking the sofa.

DramaAlpaca · 02/04/2024 22:38

I have three adult sons. I can't imagine ever sharing a bed with any of them, nor them wanting to share with me. In fact, I wouldn't want to share a room with them, let alone a bed. We are close, but we're a very private family.

Bananabredd · 02/04/2024 22:40

stitchinguru · 02/04/2024 22:30

I think the people who think it is ‘weird’ are weird…
Quite sinister to think that sharing a sleeping space is inappropriate.
My adult son is gay - does that make any difference??

Of course it doesn't, don't be daft.

Moonshine5 · 02/04/2024 22:41

Completely normal

goldenretrievermum5 · 02/04/2024 22:44

Very odd in my opinion. DD (19) and I are very close but she’d never choose to share a bed with me in a million years! nor would I want her to

Amelie2024 · 02/04/2024 22:53

It's fine in a 'needs must' kind of situation. But at home, by choice it would be a bit weird DS OR DD.

i would rather have shared with my Dad than my Mum. When we travel, I hate sharing with my Mum & she gets all offended.

we share a room because a) it's cheaper & b) she won't stay in a room by herself. That's bad enough, but sharing a bed is beyond my comfort zone, I'll take the sofa if there is one. Would have just slept in the same bed as my Dad in the same situation.

ApplesinmyPocket · 02/04/2024 22:55

Beds are beds - somewhere you sleep.

I have often shared a bed with my adult daughter (and will again) because sometimes hotel rooms or, indeed, staying in her flat call for it. I often used to ask my mum to come in my bed with me when I had nightmares as a young adult. I don't have sons, but why would that be different? Your family are just the people who are closest to you and in your 'nest' so to speak, they are usually safe and familiar.

'Sleeping' and 'beds' doesn't mean 'sex'.

Round123 · 02/04/2024 22:57

Absolutely fine!

Cavewomansue · 02/04/2024 23:07

Totally fine.

For a chat, cuddle, comfort not just practicality. I’m the mother.

Like someone else said I find it more odd that it might be seen by anyone as inappropriate, although it’s not something I’d think to mention to anyone.

LibbyLemoncake · 02/04/2024 23:24

A close friend of mine has her teenage son (14) sleep in her bed most nights.

Why? I think this is a bit weird tbh.
As a one off or when needed it’s fine but most nights? Wth?

anxioussister · 02/04/2024 23:43

It wouldn’t even occur to me that it was strange.

Can’t imagine him ever choosing it unless circumstances unavoidable - but wouldn’t bat an eyelid if my 39 yo husband shared a double with his mum in those circumstances. Or my brother + my mum.

🤷🏼‍♀️ I shared a bed a couple of months ago with my male cousin (who I grew up with like a brother) becuase we were overseas for a funeral + the family house is 90 mins from nearest hotel. I got annoyed with him for snoring but otherwise not wierd at all. My family are all nice, safe people. Obviously I’d rather have my own comfortable space if at all possible - but no awkwardness when we have to make do…

FrenchieF · 02/04/2024 23:46

Fine, there wasn’t enough beds so someone had to share. I’d share with my kids at any age.

MustBeGinOclock · 03/04/2024 00:55

I'd find this awkward