Why are MNers so absolutely fascinated by matters of class and money?

[CommeIlFaut]

There are so many interesting topic boards on here, but the theme that seems to guarantee eighteen pages of fascination, strong views and disagreement is class and money:

My income is 500k, ask me about my handbags

Does owning a spaniel make me middle class?

I’m a Marchoiness but live in a bin, come and share your strong views about this

AIBU to feel positively sorry for those vulgar enough to have their needs met with expensive holidays to nice places and clothes that fit?

What is it that makes these threads so magnetic for people? Is it the opportunity to communicate the crashing snobbery that would make them unpopular in real life? Or to fulfil their unmet need to stand on a virtual park bench and let everyone know how rich they are (‘although no one would ever know in real life, we drive a battered estate and dress only in waxed cotton’)?

I am sure the class anxiety (and fascination with rich people) is greater on here than in the general population. What’s that all about?

I think because it's a UK forum and British class system isn't a straight forward as some counties like USA where it's money/career.

It's a mix of identifiers money and history which has gotten more complex last 100 - 50 years not less - and does still impact life in UK to huge unseen extent and often in RL is never mentioned as it's cultural background noise and without thought the little identities are taken in and stereotypes applied.

It's often been strange with kids going though education system in predominately working class areas the lower aspirations and expectations till often DH PhD is dropped in conversation and suddenly they melt away - it's fucking depressing and so often invisible and easily dismissed by none affected people.

Though YouTube video on class I posted on current tread in AIBU does put forward idea that our politics has been class struggle for centuries- middle then working people getting votes and rights that it frames how it's viewed more widely.

I don't understand your sneery confusion?

Oh yeah, it's not just MN at all. This place has some exceptional performative middle class at times though. One of the best places I've seen for observing it online.

I think money is different again, because we're living through a very unevenly felt living standards squeeze. So there are a lot of threads about that.

@Vod what makes you think it's performative rather than genuine out of interest?
I sometimes see stark differences in real life. Usually through the way someone speaks and their references.

I wouldn't say performative and genuine have to be either/or? As in, I don't doubt the people doing it are middle class.

Money and class are interesting subjects but the thing that makes MN weird to me is the anxiety around them. I honestly thought all that Hyacinth Bucket stuff, where you have fixed ideas in your head about class signifiers and go to great lengths to fulfil them because you're terrified of being perceived as "lower class", was just... dated.

I don't think class is always a straightforward thing, certainly not in conjunction with wealth, but living your life with all these hang-ups about where you've come from seems rather a waste to me.

Certainly fascinating to observe though!

The net is full of fantasists lol 🙄

Crikey
I am very middle class but live in a 1 bed flat

Why are MNers so absolutely fascinated by matters of class and money?

Because the world is. Anyone who says it’s a uniquely or especially British thing is plain wrong. Class and wealth difference exists everywhere. It may present differently, but the underlying ‘them and us’ mindset is universal.

There is a very British flavour to the class discussions on here. That comes from the metropolitan, left-wing middle class centre of gravity of MN. Those people are generally embarrassed to call themselves middle class, so they assert it with the nods and winks of ‘acceptable’ thinking and choice.

It's always quite wild to me to realise that MN is seen as (or likes to see themselves as) predominantly left-wing. It's where I come to read the reactionary, socially conservative perspectives I don't get in real life.

You’re ‘avin’ a laugh!

The car threads, the "I don't care about climate change" threads, the Royal Family obsession, the hatred of protestors, the "men are like this and women are like that" beliefs... I don't even want to mention the transphobia as that will bring the FWR regulars swarming. This is not a left-wing place to me!

@LibertyLover I'm not knocking 1 bed flats. My point was more they claim to earn $500k live in a mansion & have a private chef. When in reality they earn an average wage & shop in Tesco like the rest of us.

I don't think it's middle middle class that people want to avoid - they'll happily place themselves there. It's lower middle than no-one wants to admit to. They know they won't get away with middle middle so they go for working class instead.

That happens irl as well as on mumsnet.

Although there is a related trend of mumsnet users claiming to have bucked the current 35-year-long and counting sharp contraction of social mobility by originating in a "sink" council estate (there is never a mention of any other type of council estate in these proclamations) and seamlessly growing up to earn "six figures" through nothing more than hard work. In reality a lot of these probably started off lower middle and stayed roughly about the same or became slightly middle middle.

I find Mumsnet to be pretty socially conservative. And when I’ve spoken with peers about it, they agree.

Some are

Others are obsessed about how often you mop floor or clean your loo

Others about how people words or which words they use

Or the royal family

Or Brexit

There's lots of areas of interest/ obsession on here that apply to some people but not all.

I think you do know as many people IRL who are as obsessed about wealth and money- it’s just that people don’t wave their insecurities around as much in real life as online.

people admit to all sorts of stuff they’d never discuss with friends here. ( I reckon very few people would tell their social circle their DH has ED for example)

Anyone who spends a lot of money on a car to basically go to supermarket is doing it for status. ( obviously people need bigger cars if they drive a lot, big families etc, but loads of people it’s about the label).

anyone who buys a handbag that costs more than £200 is doing it for status

We all have very bizarre relationships with money if we really admit to it.

I really don’t see that. Of course there’s a mix to some extent. But I really do think it skews ‘progressive’. Nothing wrong with that of course.

But woe betide anyone who enjoys Center Parcs over an improving holiday with the kids.

(“Josh and Imogen love time in the South of France before they go back to their wonderful comprehensive - because we’d never go private on principle”).

I find Mumsnet to be pretty socially conservative. And when I’ve spoken with peers about it, they agree*
*
What do your peers have to do with it? Do you need their back up?

Only in the sense that it suggests I’m not a complete outlier.

If you think a country is classless it's because you don't understand it.

I'd agree with this.

I’m a Marchoiness but live in a bin,

No idea, but thanks for the cackle.

I agree, I have met a lot of 'proudly working-class' wankers in the course of life.

To be fair, half the posts on any thread about class are from people saying, “Not another thread about class!”

I definitely get far more exposure to class discussion / obsession on MN than anywhere irl (and I grew up with parents who were obsessed with things being common or not), so I know what you mean op. However, MN doesn’t exist outside society so I have to assume the fascination is there, but unspoken.

I’m not too interested in what is MC or whatever (wish I could say the same about the money threads, which I’m addicted to) but I enjoy seeing the cliches pop up again and again. My favourite is someone posting about how someone or other is posh because of X or Y and other posters smartly telling them that this is actually very new money (implication = bad) and all the old money (good) they know spend their lives covered in dog hair. I’ve never heard this conversation play out other than on here, where it is a staple of the class threads.

On the money threads I love a ‘we’re loaded, but none of our friends would ever guess.’ I always imagine the peer group all smug about being secretly more wealthy than the others!