"Fit old bird"

[Platedshoes]

How would you respond?

I've posted my running result this morning. I promise I'm not a complete running bore, but this was a long race and a 20 minute personal best, so I was pretty chuffed.

There are lots of lovely comments and one man who said "excellent running, you're a fit old bird". If context is needed, I'm 53, he's 40ish and married.

Now, clearly he thinks he's being funny and/or nice, but I feel I need to say "something".

I know him fairly well IRL, through running. He's nice enough, but I'd say not terribly bright and I doubt he really gets why this might not be funny.

But you are a fit old bird 🤷🏻‍♀️
If you don't like his response, delete it.

You sound like fun OP

Maybe it's like in school when the boy that fancied you was mean to you 😬😬😬

Absolutely agree, and it's all the responses on here that cause women to let it go.
It's not an ok reply. I would be offended too.

Its not 'banter, its not a 'joke' if you don't find it funny.

Unhelpfully I'm not sure what you could respond with, as responses on here have shown you'll look like the one with a problem 🙄

Why would t you be offended by something you’ve heard before?! I mean, I’ve heard ‘you ugly cunt’ before, from someone who was hostile because I wouldn’t go out with him, and as Asian friends being called ‘’P*ki’. Familiarity doesn’t lessen offensiveness.

And if we all think that non-malicious intent necessarily impacts offensiveness, then clearly Black people should just get over people touching their hair or asking where they’re ‘really’ from.

I think it's clear that challenging sexism only leaves the woman looking humourless. Maybe reply " thank you i think"
Or yeh, I'm the peacock 🦚

Let me check I have this right. You think a woman challenging everyday sexism should reconsider in case it ‘makes her look humourless’?

Or yeh I do feel like an Eagle not a chicken! Thanks!

🤔

‘Oi, less of the ‘old bird’, cheeky fucker!’ should cover it.

The complete opposite. It a shame that overwhelmingly the consensus on this thread is either that it's no big deal or that by challenging casual sexism you look "humourless" im not afraid of looking humourless. But still, on public comments on Facebook, id want to handle it smoothly.

But is the 'old bird' in the same line as 'old bean' or 'old thing' where 'old' is more a term if affection than meaning 'old'

I wouldn't really say anything

Misogynistic eejit. I’d reply thank you for your contribution random man.

I'd be delighted if any man called me a fit old bird! I'd just smile and say thank you.

It’s a crass comment and I think I’d respond by saying something like ‘as nuanced as a 70’s sitcom, dude ‘ and an eye roll emoji.

Well there's a huge difference in the example you've given. I'm late 50s and where I'm from bird was used a lot with reference to women when I was growing up and not in a derogatory way. So no I wouldn't be offended by the term 'old bird'.

Im not even sure why it's sexist?

I honestly wouldn't register it at so

It's bird I object to and of course it's derogatory. When have you ever heard a man describe a woman he sees as talented, accomplished , professional as a bird? Would he use it to describe his mother or his sister?

Well, fortunately the law is clearer than your thought processes. The term featured in a workplace discrimination tribunal hearing in 2021, when a judge ruled that the use of the term was ‘plainly sexist’ even if intended lightheartedly.

Discussed here, also in an article saying that in a survey of 2000 British women 60% regarded it as the term they wished men would stop using.

https://graziadaily.co.uk/life/tv-and-film/love-island-stop-calling-women-birds/#

https://www.independent.co.uk/news/uk/home-news/barclays-banker-women-birds-sexism-b1923878.html

I'd be well chuffed if someone called me a fit old bird

There are loads of male equivalents - old codger, old fogey, gramps etc.

Casual sexism should be called out but I don’t think it’s helpful to have our casual sexism detector dialled up to eleven either.

It was a harmless remark.

I get called bird multiple times a day (Cornwall) its a term of endearment here 🤷🏻‍♀️

I've heard it actually. Not about his mother/sister, but about a very accomplished woman in her 80s. It's just the way some men speak sometimes when they want to come across as a bit light-hearted. The same man has also referred to women as women so I think much depends on the context.
I think the response 'less of the old' is perfect. But. It almost sounds like you two are having a mildly flirty interaction in that case! He probably admires you.

So you object to being called a bird? What animal would you rather be called then, cow?