Puppy and 3 year old

[Roadyjoe22]

Hi we’ve had a puppy reserved since newborn puppy is now 8 weeks and ready to leave next week. My youngest child is 3 years old. Any top tips on 3 year old and puppies. Anything that helped work for you etc with young children and little puppies. Puppy is a cockapoo will be 9 weeks when comes home. Currently is mostly pad trained with breeder but I’m hoping to learn her outside when she gets home. Have you any top tips of puppy training etc :) my 3 year old daughter is extremely gentle and kind, I’m well aware puppies jump nip play bite etc and I’ve tried to explain this to her. I’m also keeping a crate open with a bed in for puppy to have free flow alone time in it she needs to escape the kids!

You will have to be laser focused on your child, they are all kind and sweet until they are not!
Same with the pup, they will nip! It's what they do. Make sure they have plenty of chew toys to distract them with.
They may well be pad trained for the breeder (or just kept in a small space covered in pads that they can't really miss) but be prepared for that to go completely tits up when you bring them home, it's a massive change for them so expecting them to remember to go on the pad might be a step too far, assume you will be starting from the beginning.
Lastly (and I'm not sure how you achieve this with a three year old) if you want a calm confident adult dog you need to be showing it calm confident behaviour as a pup, if you are a family of high drama, constantly screaming, flailing arms etc don't be surprised if you end up on 'Dogs Behaving Badly'. Model the behaviour you want to see in your pup (please don't pee in a puppy pad though, that's too far😉)

Thank you for the response and I appreciate what your but my eldest does also have additional needs.. we are a loud throw your arms in the air family ! All day vocal stimming. However my brother who’s disabled to was also the same and our family pet dogs growing up turned out just fine, and my mum had 3 at one point. So don’t think the Fact my child is loud and can’t help that will inevitably mean the dog will end up on dogs behaving badly

It sounds like you have enough on your plate without adding a demanding, mouthy puppy who is a type of dog that is a mix of 2 working breed types and known for being highly strung and requiring a lot of input?

My spaniel is a lovely dog but has never enjoyed loud noises or sudden movements - despite being well socialised as a puppy and having a lovely temperament. She would have a breakdown in your home.

Why would you think to get a cocker/ poodle puppy with such young children? They are bred to be busy, generally bond to one person, need plenty of stimulation and positive training and also down time and relax quietly.

As adult dogs they are bred to be outdoors working all day - people think because they look cute little teddies they are but they are actually busy working type dogs. This is why so many cockers and cocker crosses end up in rescue. Sorry to say but this sounds like setting up for a ‘I need to rehome my puppy it’s snapped at my kids’ in 6 months time .

What breed types did your mother have?
Just because a dog will tolerate loud families doesn't mean it isn't stressed, also your mum had three dogs that were possibly a calming, comforting influence on each other.
As per the previous poster I also think a spaniel mix wouldn't be the right fit for your family (I have two!). They can easily become neurotic if they are massively over stimulated in the home and they require a lot of exercise and correct stimulation outside of the home to be mentally sound.

The therapy dog at my son’s school is a cockapoo… I’ll be paying high prices for training classes. My son being disabled is not a reason for a dog to not fit into our family. My children have equally opertunities to experience things all children do. My mum has a spaniel who my kids are more than fine around and as is the spaniel. I wasn’t really asking for advice on whether to buy a dog one already paid for her, I was asking for peoples top tips and puppy advise . My hands are very full. My daughter has seizures and is 3 and my eldest is disabled . I don’t sleep as my eldest runs of about 2-3 hours a night . We are built different us disabled child parents, im
more than able to handle a puppy in ten mix to. My children are very gentle and I’ll be raising the dog to fit around our lifestyle.. as I said the therapy dog at school is a cockapoo. Why wouldn’t i choose one? She’s chosen from two very well tempered dogs that the breeder owns both of I’ve been to see them 6-7 times over the last few weeks and more than happy with the parents .

the dog will be walked multiple times a day and exercised constantly we are very active family. She had 3 at one point, not the whole time. One was 6 before and added more to the mix, just clarify

If that's the case and you don't need/ want any advice I'm not sure why you posted.
Go ahead, your mind is made up. I hope everything works out for you.

You’ve all also assumed I haven’t researched, I’ve spoken to the owner of the therapy cockapoo st school for all tips and advice regarding the breed and also have been looking into Cockapoo’s for last few years. It’s not a “ k record I want a cute fluffy teddy dog “ decision. But thanks for your assumption.. discrimination on children with disabilities not being able to have a dog in the home is ridiculous .. I was not asking peoples opinions on buying a dog and if a cockapoo is right for my family. I’ve already made that decision. I was looking for puppy advise

I definitely wouldn't get a cocapoo with a 3 year old. It won't come fully trained like the one in school which probably took a long time to get to that level. They are a very high needs and high energy dog, they need more than walks , they need a lot of physical as well as mental stimulation. Their energy will be very overwhelming for a 3 year old with sen. My advice is to get something a bit more sedate and lower energy

Ok you don’t want any advice I understand and wish you well. Having worked in rescue I was simply sharing some advice and experience.
Just look at SpanielAid and the endless young cockers and cocker crosses that are in rescue due to snapping at children.
It’s always the dog that suffers in the end. Dogs are not a right or a need to anyone, especially not a 3 year old, why do you think rescues won’t rehome to families with young children?
Good luck to your pup.

No I do want advise. Advice on having a puppy in the home with children that’s what I’ve asked for I.e puppy training advice, toileting advice, whats worked best for some people . Nust general chat and ideas. I did Not ask advise on your OPINION on buying a dog with my children on what breed to buy .

I love the way you speak about my 3 year old asif you no her personally haha. We was all 3 once. Shes the sweetest little girl and much nicer than most adults can assure you on that!! :)

OP, I'm not one of those who think children and dogs should never mix - my youngest was two when we got our pup. I will caveat that she was a carefully chosen pup from a carefully chosen litter from a carefully chosen breeder of a carefully chosen breed! And she has been exceptional and they have a special bond.

Practical tips: stair gates. Pup and child cannot be left alone for a minute. Not even to pop to the loo. Be carefully with kids snacks, this can be where dogs get difficult. And think about the walks - a three year old is not going to want to be dragged out in the rain for an hour and a half and this, particularly with a cockapoo has to happen everyday, rain or shine.

I met a friend's new puppy yesterday and went home covered in lick with lots of nips to my hands and wrists and I got weed on when I arrived due to the excitement of a visitor. So on that basis alone, I'd suggest keeping dog and kids separate unless supervised and even then to be v careful - puppy teeth are sharp and the nipping, even in excitement and play really hurt.

Personally I think you have a lot on your plate as it is and once the "puppy moon" phase wears off, I think you're going to find it very difficult to give the dog the time and attention it needs.

I would wait until your youngest is in primary school, for your sanity as much as anything else.

I would definitely take real care with the biting. We’ve always had spaniels, one of which was a puppy when I had a 2 and 5 year old. Despite all the preparation in the world the kids did struggle with the nipping and pouncing. Those puppy teeth hurt!

Puppies need lots of sleep, they get over tidied and crazy very easily. The crate is a great thing as it will give everyone a break and and enforced rest.

Is the cocker parent a working type cocker or a show type cocker as I think that makes a huge difference. They look very different and certainly have different energy levels!

Thank you appreciate that advice we do have a stair gate on the kitchen and stairs already would you advise one on the living room to?
I work from home and I have around 2 hours free from my children when they are at school and nursery so I can do a much faster walk when they are at school and nursery , so my daughter doesn’t always need to be on the dog walks.
im always home and as I said kids attend nursery we school so will have plenty alone time with pup to to help train. I’ve booked her into training classes but she has to of had her second injection at 12 weeks before she can attend. So just wanted the best tips between now and then also :)
we have quite a few dogs in the family and puppies and they have mouthed at my daughter a few times and caused a few scratches, this is something I’m well aware of and will be extremely on high alert for, I am also aware it’s not pups fault and they aren’t doing it on purpose, but playful bites can be painful even for adults so I would never ever not be next to my little girl at all times when pup is in the same room. Thank you for the advise on snacks really good one to note

Show type cocker , I’ve got a crate ready, would you think the living room would be a good place to put this or the kitchen? I originally decided living room. Kids are well aware they do not touch the crate or puppies bed

Okay, one last thing before I go.
It really doesn't matter how sweet your 3 year old is, they are 3.
It is VERY easy for a clumsy child to hurt a puppy, maybe do some research on puppies that have ended up with broken bones because children haven't been supervised well enough and have fallen or dropped things accidentally on the puppy.
IT DOESN'T MATTER HOW SWEET YOUR CHILD IS, DONT TAKE YOUR EYES OFF THEM!
The puppy will arrive with very sharp teeth and part of puppy play is 'mouthing' everything, will your 3 year old understand this or are you all going to be flapping convinced the dog is biting?
I, like many on here am a very experienced dog owner and I didn't get my current two dogs until my children were 9 and 13 because I wanted my children to be at an age they could be responsible for another life, puppies are hard work and my children appreciate that now and are both excellent with dogs.
You sound convinced this puppy will slot right into your family and I hope it does, the rescues are full of dogs that couldn't just fit into someone's family life.

It sounds like you’re asking for advice too late tbh.

The dog at school is an adult. You’ve not seen what the puppy phase is like. You’ve not experienced the biting, nipping, weeing and pooing everywhere, ripping up toys (and I don’t mean their own) and so on.

Cockerpoos are cute, but have 2 manic breeds mixed! I have 2 working type spaniels. The youngest is 9 months and I’m just through the biting stage. Toilet training I was lucky, she nailed it quickly. However she is awake every morning at 5am, and whilst she does sleep through the day, when she’s awake, she’s very awake.

There’s an element of fault with the breeder here for allowing a puppy to go to a home with young children. For both my dogs (different breeder) it was like having an interview, so they could ensure their puppies were going to the right home. I have now young adult DC, with what I’ve been through twice in young puppy stage there’s absolutely not a cat in hells chance I’d have done it with young children.

Good luck, I suspect you’ll need it.

Oh - and ditch the puppy pads. Outside every time, every half an hour, and after every meal. Whatever the weather, and you stay outside until they wee or poo, then praise.

@ScoobyDoesnt agree the time for advice would have been long before reserving one

I have a cockapoo and I have a 2.5 year old, although I had the cockapoo first.

My cockapoo was a pain in the arse to train. Her adolescence stage was rough but as soon as we hit 2.5 she’s been the perfect dog but it took a lot of training and consistency to get to that point. Everyone in the house has to train and everyone has to be consistent. You won’t be able to take on big walks straight away, you’ll need to adapt your active lifestyle to small walks while she’s a puppy and growing.

Don’t underestimate the amount your puppy will need to sleep. Most of the day actually. You’ll need the crate and if your house is a centre of activity, you’ll probably need to close the door of the crate. Everyone needs to understand that when puppy is in her crate you do not bother her, you don’t put food or toys through the crate. The problem you have is you have to introduce rules to both puppy and children at the same time and in different ways so they understand.

You’ll need a lot of chews. My cockapoo isn’t a tough chewer and can’t be bothered with long lasting chews but you’re going to need to buy a few different chews to see what yours likes. You’re also going to have to teach children not to touch dog toys or chews and puppy not to touch children toys and teddies. They look very similar.

Puppy needs a good bed command, so you will be able to send her to bed when your daughter is having a seizure or your eldest is stimming. You’ll need a good leave and drop command for when puppy has toys she shouldn’t have when medication is dropped on the floor. Our toddler enjoys helping put the dogs food out but we make it clear, they put the bowl on the floor, the dogs leave it until told, toddler steps away, we tell the dogs they can have it and we step away to let the dogs eat. We are really consistent with boundaries for the toddler - you do not bother the dogs when they are sleeping, you do not put things in their crates, you do not touch the crates without mummy and daddy, you leave the dogs alone when eating, you ask them before you give them a stroke and if they say no, you listen.

Two children with special needs.
WFH.
Never sleep.
What could improve my life?
I know - I'll get a puppy! 😂

Google toxic dog foods and make sure your toddler doesn't drop any near the dog (grapes, raisins, chocolate etc)

Congratulations on your new puppy. You seem to have done your research and know what you are about. Despite what the doom sayers on MN think, I have always found kids and puppies are a great combination and with a little bit of planning they work out fine. Just make sure the children respect the puppies food and toys and ensure the puppy has a safe place to retreat to. Well socialised dogs are great companions for children. Enjoy!