Awful mistake at work - totally panicking, please help

[triangles5]

I’ve made a dreadful mistake at work and am devastated. I’m in tears, feel very low and am having suicidal thoughts. I’ve been with the company for several years, adore my job, am hardworking and usually careful and diligent, but it was simply silly human error. I feel sick with fear as it’s going to cost the company a significant amount of money. I haven’t spoken or apologized to my managers yet as I was so upset and couldn’t face it. But they’re aware it has happened, we’re due to meet next week and it will obviously come up. I feel sick with fear that I’m going to be sacked. And if they don’t sack me (unlikely), they’ll never be able to rely on me again as it’ll always be in the back of their minds. I’m distraught and can’t think of anything else. I’ve let the company and worse, my kids (who rely on my income) down so badly. What can I possibly do from here?

Stop and breath OP.

Don't think the worst, the worst will not occur, see what happens next week, don't phone in sick as all you will think is about it.

And if worst came to worst and you lost the job, you dust yourself down and start again it really isn't worst that could happen.

Perhaps you could speak to a friend IRL? It's not healthy to be feeling suicidal and a friend might help you to maintain perspective

It's a horrible feeling, but I'm sure the outcome won't be as bad as you think

I’ve been with the company for several years, adore my job, am hardworking and usually careful and diligent, but it was simply silly human error

@triangles5 I think you’ve got the right idea, to take control of the situation and on Monday apologise for your mistake. If you cry so what? It’s obvious you love your job and do your best and if your bosses have any sense they will consider your mistake in the context of all the things you’ve got right over the years. For all you know your bosses have made much bigger mistakes themselves during their careers.

You also have to be kind to yourself and accept yourself as a fallible human being. Whatever the outcome you’ll cope and the world will keep on turning. Most bosses would generally speaking rather hang on to the good worker who has made a big mistake than get rid and have to start again with an unknown quantity.

I'm the other side of a mistake this week. Someone at a company I contract out work to did something wrong and the work will be repeated at that companies expense. I really really hope the person who made the error doesn't feel bad about it, as these things happen and I suspect the error only happened because they haven't received enough training. I used to work at this company as and know things like this happen (I've certainly made mistakes)- and hopefully they will use it as an opportunity to learn and any decent manager would never want some worry so much about it.

Processes can always be made better, even if that means further checks before submission if there is a high risk.

Unless you never followed the process. In that case you need to reflect on and be honest on why. Are you over worked, do you need further training, inputs/outputs to the process can be organised better.

I have made some corkers of mistakes in my time. But if you are a valued/respected employee the rest of the time it is rare for employers to come down too hard, but it does need to be discussed openly.

The person who never made a mistake never made anything.

Sometimes good things happen as a result of mistakes - new drugs, new safety procedures, new inventions, new ideas.

I manage a large team in a field where it matters more than usual if something goes wrong.

However, I know people make mistakes and that they usually feel terrible when it happens and learn valuable lessons from reflecting on them.

In the scenario you describe, I'd be most likely to review the event with you, make sure any lessons learned are recorded, training is provided where this would help, and move on. I'd only take further action if I felt that mistakes were being repeated to an unreasonable degree or that something that led to the error had been addressed previously with you and not been rectified.

I recognise that panic - it's exactly what I do and 99% of the time the repercussions are minimal. Panicing now won't help you. Try to imagine the best case scenario as well as the first. When you do see your manager, be honest, apologise, make it clear that you've reflected and worked out what, if anything, you will do to prevent the same thing happening again.

As a PP said - no decent manager would want you to go through this.

But why didn’t somebody else pick your mistake up?

Absolutely if things are likely to cost the company a lot of money there should be checks and balances.

This is the mantra I use too. Will I care tomorrow? Will I care next week? Will I care next year? Will anyone care when I'm dead (in many years' time, not because you've acted on your suicidal thoughts - please don't, if you actually do feel like this, please find some support in real life or ring the Samaritans).

Worst case scenario is that you do have to find another job at some point, but you will, and you will move on. That is the absolute worst case.

Everyone messes up at work op - everyone! It's such an awful feeling but I promise it will be ok. I would go and calmly tell them what has happened - be totally honest and transparent. It will look much better if you approach them than if they have to wait to find out who it was and you didn't say anything. These things are never as bad as you think at the time x

If a simple human error can have such significant consequences then there should be something in place to mitigate the risk.

I think all you can do is own it but be proactive about what might prevent it ever happening again.

Are there practical solutions you can suggest for this so there's an additional layer of checks somewhere in the system.

Try not to let yourself spiral. If it is too easy to make an error which is not picked up elsewhere, the system needs reviewing.

You should have admitted it as soon as you realised, it's a bit late now that your manager is already aware

But yes you should go in and apologise

Is there anything that could be changed in the future to ensure the same thing cannot happen again?

Is there anything that can be done now to mitigate the error?

First, you need to make an urgent call to 111 for a GP appointment out of hours, to discuss your suicidal thoughts.
if you are actively making plans on how to end your life call 999 NOW. Or go straight to A&E if someone can take you.
DO NOT DISMISS THESE FEELINGS.

you may need a little help to just deal with the emotions this mistake is causing you. It sounds like you are maybe someone who is a perfectionist or possibly even a “highly sensitive personality”. Lots of us are, and it means that we take mistakes especially hard, and can loose perspective. If you’ve also had history of anxiety or depression it can hit you harder. If you have aLso been through traumatic things our brains can hard wire to perceive threat more. Either way, you need some space, calm to regain a sense of perspective. That may need a short course of anti anxiety meds etc to just get your equilibrium back to get you through this immediate issue.

do not try to tell yourself you can deal with thes3 emotions. You need help for, professionals NOW

As Posters are saying it is part of the human condition to make mistakes. You need to be open, honest. Try to explore how and why you made the mistake- not as an excuse but learnings for you, the ways of working in your job and the company overall. If you can say “I screwed up, and this is why/how I made that error, and here’s what I think I can do to prevent it again” it will go down well .

but that’s not the immediate thing. The immediate thing is to get to someone professional quickly to talk about how you are feeling and get targeted help.

call 111 or, if you are making plans, 999 now.

@triangles5 do you have anyone in RL to talk to? If so please do that. It will help put this into context. If you don’t please do consider calling the Samaritans on 116123 where you will get a listening ear and space to talk about this calmly.

Unless you work for Putin I can say with 99:9% confidence that your seniors would be absolutely horrified to know that this is making you feel suicidal. Just try to imagine the situation in reverse- you’d possibly be annoyed/ upset or frustrated but it’s work not a crime against a person.

Talk to someone. It will feel a bit better. The weekend will be bad but not this bad.

Good luck on Monday.

I'm not sure the processes are that great if they don't safeguard against whatever mistake you made.

Sending you hugs op. You ate human. Mistakes happen.

Where i used to work, one of my colleagues made a mistake that cost a lot of money. It was total human error. She didn't lose her job.

OP, you have made a mistake, humans do that on occasions and sensible employers recognise that, and put procedures in place to prevent this occurrence happening. Don’t be so hard on yourself. Try to relax, and enjoy the weekend.

Everything will be ok.

What is the worst thing that could happen as a result of this mistake? If it's likely you'd end up going to prison, then fair enough to worry.

Say absolute WORST case, you lose your job. You will find another one. You won't let yourself get to a stage where you lose your home or don't have enough money to eat.

Appreciate you can't tell us what's happened, but I wonder if it's as bad as you think?

Personally, I would speak with manager and own up straight away. I know your manager is aware of the issue, but I would speak with them as soon as possible, hands in the air, own up. Say it was a stupid mistake etc. I think it's fine for them to see you cry and feel guilt about whatever the mistake is.

I hope you're ok and I hope the mistake isn't anywhere as near as bad as you think x

You are human who made a mistake, that’s normal. You have done so well to have reached this point and only made this one big mistake. I’d apologise and explain how upset and sorry you have felt about it over the weekend . Please don’t be hard on yourself.

If you workplace is set up in such a way that a simple human error can cost the company a lot of money then that's a company structure problem, not a you problem.

No employee should be put in a situation where their accidental error can cause that sort of an issue (unless they are a surgeon or something where it is one person's hand that is a life or death scenario and even they should have a full team around them to support them) there should always be checks and balances in place whether that is two people to sign off on purchase orders or a second pair of eyes to check over things before they are sent out, whatever it is the company should have processed in place to mitigate it or if that isn't possible for whatever reason then they should have insurance against it, or factor it in to the cost of doing business.

Own the mistake, offer suggestions to fix it and work with the management to see that it can't happen again. It should be a learning experience for both parties.

^This, exactly

All humans make mistakes. It's normal. Your managers will know that you're a good worker who loves their job and does their best. That's what matters, not one mistake.
Believe me, I've made a few expensive mistakes myself but people understand

So did you lose 50m or was it just temporarily caught up in the wrong account t?

Sending hugs OP work anxiety is truly crippling x