Wills - second wife - what's fair?

[BarrelOfOtters]

Our wills need updated as we bought a house together. Both have life insurance in place to pay off mortgage if anything happened to one of us.

We've been married years, he has 2 kids in their 20s - I don't have kids. We are in our 50s. We both have savings of about £300k each in various forms.

I originally didn't want him to leave the house in trust to me as I didn't want the kids hanging about for their share of the inheritance. Also practically I'd downsize if anything happened to him.

But I'm now starting to think that might be the best way to do it.

The alternative was that I bought the kids out of the house so they get their inheritance - but I can't really afford to do that. Though I suppose we could do it in proportion to how much I put into the house

He's thinking the trust route is the best way to go.

What would be fair?

I thought this was a thread about William and Kate divorcing for a sec 😂

Sorry, carry on...

What do the numbers look like? As you say how much you out in implies that it's unequal? How big a percentage of the value is the mortgage?

I'd personally want to be avoiding a deed of trust if possible bit if it doesn't work it doesn't work.

Are you joint tenants or tenants in common?

I also thought this was about Rose Hanbury. I'll move along 🤣

Have a good think about what your future housing needs might look like compared to what you're in now.
The house your living in now may well not suit your needs in 20 years time and you could need to move house to downsize, no stairs etc by then.

Make sure whatever you do doesn't compromise your choices

I'd try to avoid the trust route. A clean deal would be best even if it meant the children ended up,with less. Have you done a thorough audit of all your assets.

Do you want your husband’s children to be beneficiaries in your will?

Me too!

@Hardlyworking me too!!!!!!

Apologies for starting a thread not about Wills and Kate!

Your will should say who you want the money to go to if your husband predeceases you. If he goes first, you'd get everything of his as his NOK. As you don't have any children, your will needs to stipulate who gets the money when you die, if you die after your husband, as his children won't be your NOK. You can leave everything to be split between his children.

He needs to trust you not to change your will after he dies.

I wouldn't mind if they were in my will, but I think it would be better for them to get their inheritance in one go if he dies first. Rather than wait for me to go. They will inherit from their mum too at some point.

Also to be fair if he pops his clogs and I get another partner that would all get complicated for DHs kids too. He would and could trust me to pass on money to his children. But as I say, I'm not sure that's fair on them.

I see, yes that makes sense.

If he wants his assets to eventually end up with his children his will needs to reflect that, possibly giving you the right to live in the house until you die or something like that. As his children are the ones who will potentially miss out, he needs to get proper legal advice. Otherwise if he dies, you inherit, you remarry, you die, new husband might get everything.

I would say the Will should read if your husband dies first he leave's everything to you. On your death the estate is divided 50/50. His kids get half each of your late husbands estate. You leave your half to whom ever you want.

I'm assuming his kids have a mother to inherit from.

Yes, me too! I rolled my eyes and thought 'yet more wild speculation...'

We are in the same position and our wills leave me with a lifetime interest in the value of the house to allow me to move somewhere else if I wanted. I also pushed for a clause that if I were to meet someone else and want them to live with me in the future I could but that person has 6 months after my death to move out and find somewhere else to live. He gets everything of mine if I pop my clogs first. He’s got the better end of the stick IMO.

As we get into decades of a relationship, I feel no guilt about making his child wait for the bulk of their inheritance. They will get collections of significant value that they can choose to sell.

That's helpful, thank you. As we get further into our relationship, the more I am thinking I don't necessarily want to leave my home if he pops his clogs. We are the same age, and likelihood is, given family history, I'll go first so this is probably all moot.

The kids will have other inheritance than just the house.

Actually you have really helped me to clarify things.

I think not leaving the house in trust to you is only an option if you already have a house in your name only that you could move into straight after his death.

I wouldn’t contemplate being in the position of having to buy a house/buy his dcs out just when I’m dealing with the grief of loosing my partner. With all the stress and worry around having enough money to do that - will I able to stay etc….
(id have a will providing the same to him btw, money then going to whoever you want after your death. Him or other members of your family. But ensuring he can stay in the house with no bother)

Also, you need to remember that you have £300k now. But you dint know how much you’ll have when he dies (loads can happen!) nor can you tell if the value if your savings will follow the price increase if the house (unlikely).

Also I’m assuming he has other savings that the dcs would be able to inherit straight away too?

It will eventually go to them. It's half your house, you will both hopefully live another 30+ years but you don't want to in your 80s and needing to move. Let them wait.

My sister was widowed and has remarried, he has a lifetime interest in her house now and sold his and gave his kids their inheritance. It seems unfair as her children have to wait a long time for theirs.

Some of the house is mine, and I would if possible like that value to go to my nephews and nieces, but I think actually that would be too hard and I should just accept that I've had the benefit of living there for that portion of my money and that it will go to the his children.

My nephews and neices will get other inheritance from me, crossed fingers, if it doesn't all go on care fees.

Which is something I haven't thought about with life interest in the house....

I would hate the trust or life interest as it could be potentially annoying if the relationship with his children sours.

Could you explore a clause in his will along the lines of "my children are entitled to a 50% share in the value of the house at the date of my death* This must be paid with X months of my death either by purchase of my 50% share, sale of the property and/or by other mutually agreed method."?

*solicitor to draft clause in cases of market adjustments that impact this value.

Have yours, altered to mirror same too.

I'm not a solicitor but that's what I would like to do with mine.

We had that with the previous house, it was worth less and I could have bought the kids' share from them and lived in it. I was happy with that. It also meant there was a cut off point.

With our new house, I would have to sell it to give them their share, rather than choosing to sell it if you see what I mean.