I'm going on household strike, and they've got the fear!

[FrillyGoatFluff]

I have made an executive decision. Next week, I am going on household strike.

Currently household manager to myself, DH, DSD19, DSD19's BF 21, DSD12 (nearly 13) and DD2. I work three days a week - out of the house 7.30 to 6.30 - home with DD2 2 days.

DSD19 and her BF (who is an absolute darling, happy to have him here) are moving into their own place at the end of the month.

However. I am sick of being the only bugger to manage the cooking/shopping/meal planning/tidying element of life. Cannot get through to any of them how much of a workload this is for 6 people with very different needs on a daily basis.

So, as of next week, for a week, I'm handing it all over to them. Planning, shopping, cooking, clearing, washing, tidying, school admin - the works. I'm working three days, out at a hospital appointment one day and little one and I will be out another day doing something noisy and soft play-y, I imagine.

There's three adults, and a VERY capable nearly teenager. They'll have to work it out between them. I've warned them that I will be coming home and sitting on my arse, only rising to eat my dinner and play with the little one.

The fear in their eyes was hilarious. How do we think this is going to go?

If they do stuff when asked can you together make a rota for cooking/cleaning etc?

Why should SHE "look after" her family. There's another adult in this unit and adult children who presumably have functional brains and limbs. The OP works so the family should work as a team.

Are you one of these muppets who expects to be waited on hand and foot?

She is. She’s looking after the 2yo and training up the 12yo. And expecting the adults to act like adults.

Parents who do everything for their DC and send them out into the world unprepared for the mundane realities of adult life aren’t doing them any favours, in the long run.

@BeNimbleAmberEagle well, that is true, I am a mother. But if we're being picky, I am only a mother to a 2 year old.

And don't panic, she isn't included in having to whip up a roast for the rest of the clan. She can't reach the buttons on the hob yet for a start 🙄

A tip to anyone who's fed up of sorting socks - I keep all the freshly washed socks in a bag next to the washing machine.

I sort through and take all of mine, pair them and put them away. It is entirely up to my other family members whether they do the same or whether they go to the bag every morning for a fresh pair.

I think you can guess which option they go for!

But no more resentfully sorting out socks for me.

I do something similar with the laundry. I put mine away. DH's goes in a big heap.

His house was full of big heaps when I met him.

I was young and naive.

A houseshare, in which socks were lying around all over the house. Everyone denied it was them, so I started throwing them out as they apparently did not belong to any of us. Socks stopped being left around.

Oh my god. We have discovered a time traveller, fresh in from the last century.

Did you come by tardis ?

Where does 21 year old SIL fit in? You didn't mention her in the first post?

Good for you! Keep us posted and enjoy the time to yourself.

@Zyq sorry, Son in law (of sorts). He's DSD's boyfriend, living here while they wait to move into their rental together at the end of the month.

Absolute gem, and actually the most hands on. Hovers around while I'm cooking to pick up tips (actually makes notes on his phone and takes pictures, he hasn't had a lot of guidance at home). Taught him to make gravy last weekend, which blew his mind.

There's always one, isn't there. And today it is you.

Following for hilarious accounts of terror in their eyes, utter bemusement from them when trying to juggle everyone’s needs, pictures of inedible meals and nice updates of all the things op is going to do for herself completely guilt free. On that note op make sure you hide a bag of delicious snacks so you don’t go hungry.

I love this! Make sure you hide some food for
yourself and the 2 year old!

Looking forward to the update.

Brilliant. Stand your ground! And let this be the start of a set up involving everyone pulling their weight!

Great work!

Why does your husband not function? Why did he raise his kids to be useless and to use you?
You never should have started pandering to these people.

Well done. 👏

Then having proven they can cope, they get to cope full time.

Well done you. But do it for longer!

My family was forced into this situation last year when I became very unwell for some months.

It started off with my dd rallying the troops, creating lists and rotas. She got fed up in the end of having to keep on them all the time and them not always honouring their part of the bargain and so, in the end it was every man for himself and nobody wanted to clean anything because nobody else was doing it and nobody wanted to make anything to eat in case they had to do it for someone else. There was a simmering resentment. My eldest ds, who is an adult with a family of his own, observed whilst visiting that it had descended basically into a typical houseshare situation.

I hope you fare better!

This reminds me of a former large student house share. There was a kitty & rota for who cooked supper, who washed up, (but no-one cleaned the loos or swept the floor.. ) but it was only for supper, I can't even remember what happened for other meals & at the w/e. it was a pigstye ! I only stayed there a term !!!

I expect they will basically order take aways, & wash up once at the end of their "time".
There will be no basics in the fridge & squabble there's no bread for toast (so you need a stash), no loo paper, everything will be sort of "OK", but not to your standard. They won't bother to change their sheets, & people will do their own laundry, so the elec will rocket !
You will then need to clean toilets & bathrooms & wash the floor the week after..
Watching with interest

Whats your plan if they do nothing but eat crisps and cereal and live in filth?

Fair enough, but will they expect you to deal with it after you finish your strike?

They may call your bluff.

How has it ended up like this? Why has your husband allowed his kids to end up do useless? Sounds like crap parenting from him.