How do you keep on top of your home?

[Gymmum82]

If you work full time?
In the past we had a cleaner but unfortunately due to the costs of everything increasing we can’t afford that anymore. Both me and DH work full
time. I feel like my house is constantly a mess, I feel like all I do is get home from work try to clean up a bit, cook dinner. By the time I’m sitting down to eat it’s 9pm then we go again the next day.
Does anyone have any methods which work? I’ve tried flylady (too much to do every day) tomm (worked for a bit but I found it unsustainable)
I know part of the problem is we just have too much stuff. But I never get time to declutter so the mess remains. Can anyone help with what you do each day?
I leave the house by 6.30am most mornings and get home around 5.30-6pm.

I tried not using a cleaner but the house looked like a squat in no time. In the end we had to admit defeat. Somethings are worth the expense.

You need a couple of days off work without the kids to chuck stuff away. I tend to do this around November to get ready for Christmas. Don’t get them involved, don’t tell them, just do it.

Also make sure your storage is decent, then stuff has a home.

You need to train the kids, plates in the dishwasher, clearing the table, putting stuff away. You all have to pull your weight.

Also, don’t sweat the small stuff, skirting boards not dusted - doesn’t matter, kids rooms not tidy - doesn’t matter.

In your op you said you leave at 6.30?

It depends on the day. Mondays and Thursdays I leave later around 6.30. Tuesdays, Wednesdays and Fridays earlier around 5.30. DH leaves later than me but if he’s taking the kids to school then he’s working at home until that time. If he’s taking them to breakfast club then he’s usually rushing to get them ready.
We do need more of a routine definitely but there’s no chance of anything getting done in the mornings and emptying the dishwasher before bed seems impossible as it’s never finished it’s cycle by the time I go up to bed

It varies week on week. Usually Mondays and Thursdays it’s 6.30. Tuesdays Wednesdays and Fridays 5.30. But sometimes it’s different. Just depends on work shifts

I pay dd to do the cleaning every week.

I do the bathrooms but she polishes, hoovers and cleans the kitchen and tidies up as she goes so that definitely helps. I’d be giving her the money anyway most likely so it’s a win win!

I actually ditched the cleaner to attempt a more radical approach of de cluttering. We had approx 3 hrs a fortnight. I was tidying up more than cleaning and just stuffing things in cupboards. Dh had zoned out thinking the cleaner was handling it all. The cleaning didn't take very long. It's the tidying.

If you can afford it can be good to hire someone. A friend got some of the money back as a lot of cds and toys were sold by the person as part of the service.

Alternatively set aside an hour or two every weekend to target an area of the house to de clutter. You could take a few days off to do it but I think you'd both need to be off in my experience.

I've found linking tasks and times the most helpful approach but it's work in progress. Eg one person does a quick clean of bathroom toilet and sink when ds 2 is in the bath in a Sunday and a Tuesday or Thurs. The other deep cleans the kitchen on Sunday while that's going on and does the online food shop.

Friend's top tips from de clutterer were to sort out your exit strategy (eg only de clutters lot if you know when it will go to charity shop or tip) and start in one corner and work clockwise.

I also prioritised the most important area first which for us is an open plan kitchen where we spend a lot of time but also a lot of stuff gets dumped. So I've gone through kitchen cupboards, rearranged and then it's been easier to set up the routine of deep clean and de clutter every Sunday, with a top up on Tuesday (just how our working week falls.)

I'm not full time but I have chronic illness / medication that can sometimes see me flat out with exhaustion on my 1-2 days "off."

I think its all been said there but it sounds like the problem is a family one not your alone. I'd start with a family meeting and division of labour. My kids have small daily chores and 1 weekly. I wrote a list and they got to pick what they prefer or they can swap if they request it. They are sorting laundry, vacuuming stairs (we have handheld), dusting, surface clean of bathroom etc. All about 10 mins max. One DC elected to empty the dishwasher every morning in lieu of a weekly task. The consequences vary on the child, tablet time motivates one best. So on a particular day, his chosen chore day, he doesn't get it til the job is done. Laundry not in a basket is never washed, let then panic when they don't have their sports kit or uniform and they will learn. If DS1 doesn't do his I don't make his lunch in the morning, he knows now its in his best interests to just do it. I had to get really tough and didn't enjoy that.

I think if you can get on top of daily and weekly stuff you can tackle bigger things. Maybe 45 mins scheduled a week and 1 cupboard or corner each week. Make a schedule, break each task down if you don't have the big block of time. For example 1 shelf in the fridge each day for a week while the dinner is cooking or while kids are getting PJs on and that's the fridge sorted.

Can your DP not empty it on their lunch break, and run the hoover round?

He doesn’t work from home. He does a bit of work in the mornings before 9 if he’s taking them to school then drives to work after drop off

Taking a step back from this, how important is it to you to have a tidy house? What are your reasons for wanting it tidy? Is it because you feel it should be or because you think it will benefit your life in some way? And how much do you want it compared to other things you want in life?

Ultimately having a tidier living environment is a function of yours and your family's time use equation. Whatever hack tips there are the reality is if you want a tidier house you either have to use some of your day for it, or get your family to use more of theirs. It can be done- it's just whether it forms a high enough priority.

So for me, I decided that my ideal level is really a bit of tidying but that I'll never be at show home standard. I'd only be able to do this if I gave up faffing on mumsnet or sleeping another hour. So that's what I choose. But it's always a choice? You have to find the right balance for you and there is no right answer. And it's ok to have a less than perfect house!

Although similar to other posters it's amazing what you can do in a 15 minute timer. I did 15 minutes pre work and did some filing, put washing away and emptied the dishwasher

That's what I was thinking. if you're all out most of the day, where is mess coming from?

How can he get work done when he has two kids to look after? Would it be better/possible for him to dedicate that time to other things?

Before we moved home we got a skip in the drive. Each day for an hour I'd rifle through all the crap we'd accumulated and was ruthless. I gave anything to charity shops that I could.
I think sometimes you just have to look at things, and if you don't need it or regularly use it - get rid.
I vowed when we moved that we would be clutter free. Less 'stuff' is actually very therapeutic. Now if I open a cupboard or drawer, it only got things in that we genuinely regularly use or need.
Just give yourself 30 mins each day to dedicate to areas/rooms and be ruthless.
My new home is much easier to sort/tidy/clean now.

They are 7 and 10. Pretty self sufficient. They get themselves up and dressed for school. Get their own breakfasts. He just needs to be in the house and take them

I guess my point was - would it not be a better use of his time if he sorted the dishwasher, breakfast things etc. before leaving instead? Or could one of the DC have the job of doing the dishwasher etc?

I do this morning. Then load dishwasher at night. Needs to be on twice a day to keep up with all the dishes.

Loads of great advice here. If you can afford it, one of those robot hoovers is a great bonus, if the carpets look ok my anxiety levels are bearable!

I don’t want it to be a show home. But just not an embarrassment when guests come and I would like less stuff. Often when I can’t find something I need I wish we had less stuff and things were easier to find

If emptying dishwasher in the morning doesn’t work for you, how about emptying it in the evening before dinner and refilling after dinner? Find a time that works for you. Don’t sweat the deep cleaning
under furniture and inside cupboards. No one can see it and if it gets really filthy you can clean them once a year or so.
With declutter, you’re probably off in the school holidays sometimes with your kids? Do it then, list some of the stuff on eBay and motivate the kids to help with a share of the profits.

First person home in the afternoon or evening empties the dishwasher? You can run it in the night or start it in the morning before you leave.

An alternative to always catching up with the dishwasher is to buy more plates/ bowls, and cutlery. Or if you can identify one especially busy evening in the week, could you buy paper plates and use them that day, just to give yourselves a break?

Never turn on the dishwasher before dinner.

Cram as much as possible into it when you load it.

Make sure the kids bring their own bags and coats and PE kits or whatever to the exit door at night. Make sure DH gets them out in the morning with all their stuff plus lunchboxes.

This shouldn't be up to you in the mornings. The kids are old enough to pack their own bags and gather their own stuff at night and out it all where they need it.

This thread has inspired me and today between 11-2.30 I deep cleaned the upstairs in my house. 3 big bin bags to charity and 2 big bin bags of rubbish. I have to hoover in the playroom tomorrow (need to take the bags to charity first!) then I'm going to do downstairs on Thursday and Friday.
I've ordered some different storage solutions and I'm just going to go mad with chucking/donating stuff so it stays easier to clean.

I used to be like you, OP. Always overwhelmed. Too much ‘stuff’

Years ago I got rid of 85% of our stuff, and I have never looked back. It’s awesome living this way.

There are 5 things I must do each morning before leaving the house.

      ~ Kitchen - ( it’s always spotless at bedtime so mornings are super easy) 

      ~ Hang out washing ( washed overnight)

      ~ Anything that needs to go away from the front entrance 
       
      ~ Make bed

      ~ Set robot vacuum to work