Odd man who says hello

[Chilto]

I walk my year 6 child to school, crossing 3 roads. Sometimes we encounter a man who’s about 30s and he says hello. I mutter a hello back, but we don’t know him and tbh I get slightly bad vibes from him (hard to explain). But the man has obviously done nothing wrong.
To get ready for secondary school I am considering letting dc walk to school alone, but am worried they might encounter the man! I have explained to dc that we don’t actually know the man but that I respond to hello out of politeness and if it happens to them they can mutter hello but must keep walking, don’t stop. I also said that adults shouldn’t talk to kids on their own so if it happens they should let me know.
I am worried re letting dc walk alone. Grateful for any thoughts

I'm always smiling at random people. Does this make me a weirdo?

Obviously if this man turns out to be a serial killer we will all eat our words but I expect he is harmless.

Trust your instincts OP. No-one commenting here has seen what he looks like, heard the way he says it, seen his eyes or body language etc etc. Something makes you creeped out and that's all you need. I might delay the walking alone thing.

@Carouselfish makes a valid point.

I agree with you. I find some locals are friendly, particularly the older ones but where we live I've noticed people really keep themselves to themselves. I don't even know what my neighbours look like but we do know a few familiar faces

More lazy London stereotyping! I live in zone 2 NE London and lots of nodding/smiling/hellos/small talk goes on in the street in my neighbourhood. And in all parts of London, including busy West End areas etc, I also experience plenty of small talk/shared brief laughs with strangers. This 'no one talks to each other in London' thing is just horseshit.

But anyway, I wonder if the OP's 'bad vibes' she gets from this man are just because she's already decided he's weird on the grounds that he speaks to her and her son.

West London here, @Isitbedtimeyet3 , but same.

But anyway, I wonder if the OP's 'bad vibes' she gets from this man are just because she's already decided he's weird on the grounds that he speaks to her and her son.

This was my initial thought. The fact she thinks it's odd a stranger she sees regularly says hello does rather suggest the problem here isn't the friendly bloke.

Why are people so focused on the "hello" bit?
Clearly it's not about him saying it, it's that OP is getting a bad vibe. Whether she can pinpoint it or not, is irrelevant. Don't think many of the posters on here would be so comfortable sending their child out alone, knowing they'd be encountering a man who looks "dodgy".
I've had this kind of experience myself with a local stranger who gave me both the cringe and the creeps 😀we had had a very brief chat at the pub where he works, but from then on I just had the vibes and since then whenever I see him, I cross the street and avoid his eyes. There was just something intense about him and the look he'd give me, might be completely innocent but made me feel uncomfortable.

I don't think it's unusual to say hello to someone you see on your route each day

It’s not lazy stereotyping to comment that many men use ‘hello’ as a pretext to harass women. It’s fact. I’ve lived in London my entire life. Obviously my experiences are different from yours but it is what it is.

I didn’t say no-one talks to each other in London. I chat with strangers all the time. But, depending on the context, I’m careful around lone men who try to engage me in a conversation in the street. It’s called common sense. Why should the OP feel obliged to smile and nod at this man?! So many bizarre comments on this thread.

Op hasn't suggested the hello is a prelude to engaging her in conversation.

I didn't say it was stereotyping that many men use ‘hello’ as a pretext to harass women. I didn't even address that point

My comment about stereotyping was in response to people saying 'no one talks to strangers in London'. I thought I was pretty clear about that.

This is awful
Can't people say hello to others.

Must everyone walk round like a Zombie not speaking to anyone.
We are all just humans on this planet.
This is quite possibly the worst thread I've read and very sad too.

If you had a problem or you were in an accident and This person helped you that would be OK, but he can't say hello.

I agree this is awful and very sad. I have sons, are they never to say hello or good morning in case some WEIRDO thinks ill of them? What a lonely world.

It's normal to say hello, what an odd thread. Your the odd one op by saying odd man.

Isn't it just!!!

Some mumsnetters are OTT... it's amusing

WHAT A DICKHEAD.
CALL THE COPS.
KEEP MUTTERING.

the problem with this argument is that we've all heard endlessly from people whose instincts are to wrap their children up in cotton wool and never let them out.

Meanwhile, one of the most worrying aspects of letting your child out into the world is the fact that so many of the worst predators don't make any of our instincts flare up.

😂

Thanks for all the replies, really interesting to hear different views. We are in the South East and in our area it is not usual to say hello to strangers on the street.
The people who mentioned men saying hello as a prelude to chatting people up/harassment touched a nerve with me as I think that is what I feel it’s a bit like. The youngish men who I can recall speaking to me randomly on the streets in the past were in this category. I can’t remember an instance of a youngish woman speaking to me.
Random men speaking to me happens a lot less now though that I’m middle aged. I think I will continue walking with ds - he can practise independent walking on the home journey instead

The people who mentioned men saying hello as a prelude to chatting people up/harassment touched a nerve with me as I think that is what I feel it’s a bit like
It's not remotely "a bit like" this, because it literally hasn't happened. Give over.

Then again, he could be NT.

Neither do I.

I live in a village and only the weirdos don’t say hello to people they pass in the street. Male, female, old or young.

I would also monitor discreetly if the man is walking purposely from one location towards a destination - it’s usually obvious in their demeanour - i.e. he has a reason or business to be there.

(I have learnt to observe and be suspicious of those who are loitering, observing, wandering randomly, not taking a direct route at pace from A to B and are taking an unusual interest in the surroundings - these are the men whose behaviour have caused me (legitimate) concern in the past.

The level of paranoia on this forum is insane. This is why mumsnet has a bit of an odd reputation.

Not everywhere is London or big city. It is perfectly normal is most of the country to say hello/good morning to people you walk past. It isn’t suspicious and you don’t need to monitor the person. Jesus. How do some of you get through the day.