Most beneficial extracurriculars?

[Zebrabear]

I your opinion what were the most beneficial extracurriculars for your dc's (if you have older ones) & what did you feel they gained from them.
I know sheer enjoyment is the most important thing but some as so expensive for little return.
For my three dds swimming has been the most beneficial as it's a life skill.

Swimming and mixed martial arts.
Swimming as a life skill.
Martial arts, as fitness, dedication, resilience, self defence, confidence, discipline and enjoyment

DS had no interest in extra curricular activities as he is neither sporty or musical. Y2 teacher set joining something as a target for him and he picked learning a language as the lesser of the evils. Now he has a GCSE in the language and plans to study abroad. And it’s useful when we go on holiday!

@FunLurker thank you. Just revaluating our extracurriculars this morning. One club the dds go to seems to blatently favour certain families & the dds are losing confidence as it's the same kids picked every term. (This club is run by volunteers btw)

@IncognitoUsername that sounds fantastic & very useful. Great for his confidence too.

Swimming from when they were babies until toddlers. Football from 4yrs until 11yrs.

They had a go at other stuff such as athletics and gymnastics but didn't enjoy them, so we gave those up.

They're adults now and DC1 still plays football.

Stagecoach for confidence, and for my younger dd, it's made her speak a lot more clearly (my mum couldn't understand a word she said until she was about 6!)

They have learned to swim but they don't love it. I wish I could find a sport/exercise they enjoy. I think it's much easier as an adult to keep fit if you've got an activity you like doing.

Swimming when they're younger as it's necessary to enable other activities.
In DDs case very much so as her main extracurricular activity was watersports. Sailing and windsurfing on a cold reservoir developed strength and resilience (and was enormous fun). As an adult she's not near anywhere suitable for that so she's switched to kayaking, took to it like a duck to water.

Swimming and guiding for both of mine.
Piano was working well with the eldest for a while.
Dance for one and football/all sport! For the other.
As an aside I don’t think young children need to actually be that good at these things in order to benefit from them. My eldest is neither particularly sporty or exceptionally musical but has got a lot out of trying various things.

Beavers, and then Cubs has been the most beneficial for us. There's a huge variety of activities, confidence has developed greatly, plus the overnights and camps have helped develop independence.

Swimming was also a non-negotiable but once he got to a certain stage, we've let our son choose something else.

Something they love and gain confidence from.

For mine this has been different at different ages/stages.

Child 1, used to ride a lot and spend a lot of time at the stables while home educated. Also skateboarding. Now as a young teen she has discovered rowing, which is now her real passion. She goes to the gym 4 times a week to train for it off her own bat. She’s connected with a lovely peer group, and the sport requires real discipline.

Child 2 is more musical, and on starting high school now takes extra lessons and spends his lunchtimes in the music department. He has a talent and loves it.

Youngest is only 6, loves everything.

All go to Scouts/Cubs/Beavers dependent on age, all have had swimming lessons (6 year old just started, but could already swim really anyway)

Martial arts because self-defence is a life skill. Also languages if they can get good quality tuition because languages are much easier to learn as a child. Tbh though I think it’s anything they can stick at - you won’t see the benefit of any hobby unless you do it for years.

Dancing, drama and singing when younger was great for learning to use her body. But we weren't into the competitions etc so gradually our face didn't fit.

Swimming was great as we live near the beach and lead on to diving, synchro, competitive swimming and watersports

Recreational tennis was good for learning a skill and enjoying sport with no pressure

Rugby has been fantastic at building determination, resilience and body positivity and social skills

Young Wardens at our local Wildlife trust is great for learning about the environment and for DoE.

The hardest thing is knowing when to drop an activity and move on, it feels like the bonds you've made as a parent, the expense you've put in for costumes, competitions and training etc will be giving up to start from scratch. But when they move it turns out the skills are transferable and as a parent you make new bonds.

@Singleandproud that's how I'm feeling, they have been attending this group (volunteer led) & there is favouritism every term towards certain families. My three never get a look in. It's very cheap & accessible but they are constantly overlooked for certain kids & it's always been like this. Some children appear to be more valued than others.

Overall... Scouts. (They've been Beavers through to Scouts so far, and elder did Rainbows for a year before Beavers.). The range of skills they've learnt plus confidence gained has been immense.

Swimming... I came to feel swimming lessons were a massive con. The water confidence and actual swimming was important...been able to do some of the other box ticking stuff was a waste. Especially at the expense of teaching them some of the life saving skills and a bit of endurance. Honestly... the school lessons DD had in Yr5 were more beneficial than some of the "proper" lessons.

Otherwise... an activity they enjoy. For mine, its climbing for one, and rugby for the other.

Music lessons. They have taught them the important lesson that practise = results. I have one dc who is such a quitter, and hates it if he’s not good at something instantly. So I always point to his piano, and remind him how when he started learning whatever piece he’s currently on, he got the notes wrong and couldn’t remember the rhythm, but after a few weeks of regular practise he can play it beautifully.

It really helps him to regain perspective when he’s losing his shit about hating French or rugby or whatever because he thinks he’s ‘rubbish’ at it.

my dc do a sport and a musical instrument each.
both exercise and music are benificial for brains & brawns.
however, it's important that dc have enough downtime and school comes first.

Definitely a couple of years of swimming, it's vital.

We did:
Rainbows/Brownies - like school but more chaotic, no value to it really.
Gymnastics - face eventually didn't fit as she wasn't the best at it.
Dance - as above
Drama - brilliant, so many skills and a diverse bunch of good supportive friends.

As an aside I don’t think young children need to actually be that good at these things in order to benefit from them. My eldest is neither particularly sporty or exceptionally musical but has got a lot out of trying various things.

That's very true.
There's some activities for which an adage I remember from a school speech day apply 'if a thing is worth doing, it's worth doing badly'. sure,you should try to do things to the best of your own ability but just because you'll never win a medal doesn't mean you can't enjoy and benefit from a sport or whatever!

I know what you mean about favouritism by leaders. We had this with cricket and football. If you weren’t part of the gang then your kid could forget getting picked to play matches. The families (especially the Dads) were very cliquey. We soon abandoned those sports and switched to things like badminton and fencing.

Obvious question but do/could you or their dad volunteer?

@ErrolTheDragon no, there's never been a shout out for volunteers & if anything they have too many for the size of the group. Majority have been there 20 years plus. None of the parents of any of the kids are volunteers.

DS never liked team sports. His hobby is riding. He volunteers at the stables on Sundays and in exchange gets to go on the outrides for free. His ambition is to be a vet so doing work around animals will be helpful for university applications.

Swimming... I came to feel swimming lessons were a massive con. The water confidence and actual swimming was important...been able to do some of the other box ticking stuff was a waste

@PuttingDownRoots I think the early swimming was good for dd1, but it was when she was 6yo and she couldn't progress in her group because she didn't do a stand up dive quite well enough, but they weren't allowed to swim more than two lengths was the point I decided they were a waste of money. She was never going to be a competitive swimmer, so concentrating on survival and stamina and enjoying it to me were more important.

I think the one all three of mine have got most out of is drama/musical theatre. But dd2 got a huge amount out of her band too. They toured places and she keeps up with those friends more than any others.
Dd2 is now studying MT at uni and ds is talking about going into the technical side currently.

Scouts / guiding
My children have gone from Beavers/ Rainbows to explorers now, becoming leaders and young leaders.
This has been useful for completing the Duke of Edinburgh award scheme.
Transferable skills have been teamwork, leadership, resilience, organisational, and achieving personal goals.
This was more useful as it was not the group most school friends attended

Swimming lessons as a life skill

The ones they stuck with longest (ongoing in adulthood) were archery and hockey. But they did all sorts over the years and none of it was completely wasted, even if they only did it for a few months and moved on.

DD did dance and drama from about 5 to early teens, great for confidence and although she doesn't presently do either she knows she can pick them up again.

Swimming club - she wasn't all that competitive and gave up in mid teens but great fitness and strength from that.

Brownies / Guides - probably the least beneficial overall but she quite enjoyed it at the time.

DS - football wasn't great till he found a disability team (he's dyspraxic) then it was great for a few years. Hockey has been amazing for him, very inclusive. Climbing was hugely beneficial as well in developing upper body strength. Scouts - went right through from Beavers to Explorers and became a young leader, this was hugely beneficial too.

Neither took to music lessons AT ALL. Same for me now I think about it, that was the biggest waste of time and money for all of us.