Anybody else find CBT and Mindfulness unhelpful?

[Blackcats7]

I have chronic depression and anxiety and ocd plus newly diagnosed with high functioning autism.
I have tried cbt from two different psychologists and find it utterly unhelpful.
The constant scoring makes me feel under pressure to under estimate my numbers to improve so as to validate my therapist by being a “good” patient.
I also absolutely despair of the way mindfulness is seen as a supposed cure all and feel I will scream if one more person suggests this to me yet again as it has been zero use to me.
I am physically disabled and have chronic pain and the various suggestions for relaxation are things I can’t do due to either physical or sensory limitations.
Is it just me and everybody else finds these things wonderful?

There re a a lot of people on this thread that don't understand what mindfulness is.

It's not about clearing your mind, it's not about focusing on your problems, it's not about achieving some sort of meditative calm state, it's not about relaxing, it's not about navel gazing.

It's about being present, being aware of what you are feeling in your mind and your body whatever that is (not trying to change it), and focussing your mind on one thing, it's about getting out of your head and into your present experience. It's an antidote to modern life where our minds are usually full with stuff, and jumping about, often spiralling, and running from one thing to the next thing on the list.

Your focus can be anything. It can be your breathing but it can also be the feel of your feet or your body or the wind on your face or the smell in the air as you are running, or the feeling of the dirt on your hands or the sun on your face, or the beauty of the plants as you are gardening. Mindfulness can be anything. It's about being present the moment rather than thinking about one thing (or usually multiple things at a pace) while doing something else. The latter isn't really very healthy for us but what modern lives tend to push us to do. Being mindful just turns that for a little bit and over time, with practice, trains our minds (and therefore our emotions) to be a bit calmer and a bit more present.

CBT can be very effective with the right therapist (I find the CBT therapists that you get referred to now under the NHS not particularly great tbh but have had fantastic CBT from a clinical psychologist in the past) but like all therapies it doesn't work for everyone and certainly neither mindfulness nor CBT, although they can be helpful and effective, should be viewed as a universal panacea and they shouldn't be the only options on offer.

@dottieautie It's worth knowing I myself am diagnosed autistic and dyslexic. I am all too aware of the differences neurodivergence can make to experience of therapy. And I agree with you that it needs much more genuine understanding rather than the current "awareness" that simply doesn't go deep enough. I am a private practitioner and spent several years training in CBT at degree level. Whereas some (not all) NHS staff providing CBT have simply done this as a relatively short add on course that allows them to deliver it but lacks the depth of skill required. A decent practitioner would recognise where it doesn't work and adapt their method to support the client, as well as taking on board the feedback from the client throughout. I also agree there needs to be far more available than the standard short intervention CBT. 6 session interventions do not work for things beyond very mild anxiety/depression. They are on offer because they are easily evidenced and cost effective for cracking through waiting lists- which is why I do not work for NHS or insurance companies as it doesn't prioritise all clients needs.

I am so disappointed to hear a therapist spoke to you in such a manner, and that you were given such a harsh experience of CBT. I quite agree that there could be a clearer triage stage that would help to access the correct therapy for each individual. I would say GP's probably aren't best for that as it's not really in their wheelhouse but there could be more done on referrals to highlight potential presenting factors and then the decision could be made by the mental health team. Part of the problem is NHS are very much for CBT- which would not be a bad thing if they also provided TA, EMDR, CFT etc but is a limiting thing when every man and his dog is pushed straight to CBT. For what it's worth I don't know any private CBT practitioners who are 100% strictly CBT in their approach, most tend to bring in other methods along the way depending on what their client needs. Clients are vulnerable and often fragile, they deserve the right (and best) support. That right support is not always going to be CBT.

My DD is 17 and CAMHS are getting frustrated with her for not responding to CBT. They may stop helping her.

She has autism, OCD, depression and anxiety. She is on LOTS of medication. She finds the therapy and homework pointless and says she's not in a good enough position mentally to do the tasks.

It's sort of reassuring to learn of others' experiences; especially regarding CBT and autism. It annoys me that the implication from CAMHS is that it's DDs fault that it's not helping: that the fault is with her rather than with the suitability of the therapy, or whoever recommended it for her.

As an aside, I agree with the PP above about cold water therapy. I live by the sea, and a cold dip several times a week seems to give me a mental reset, stave off my anxiety and help me be more able to cope with DD.
That's as well as the physical benefits!

Exposure therapy, physical exercise, and immersing myself in nature are the foundation for combatting my social anxiety and depression.

Also I know it might seem a bit silly, but I find myself talking to myself quite a bit these days. I’ve realised that it helps me get to the root of why I’m feeling a certain way, what’s holding me back from healing, and what my life could be like if I don’t take action. When I speak out loud, it just seems easier to really dig deep and remind myself why it's so important I start making positive changes. I've unearthed some very important things about myself doing this and have written a lot on post-it notes and stuck around or put them in my phone notepad to remind me why I want to get better and that although it won't be easy, I'm worth the effort.