Ever been on holiday where you couldn't wait to come home

[GardeningQuestionTime]

OK I'm in the sun and it's February...but I'm stuck on an where nothing to do except snorkel and its too windy.

The hotel needs serious updating, there are cocks crowing all night, the breakfast was minimal. The advertised beach is lovely but literally a beach. My alternative plan of lying on the beach reading are scuppered by no umbrella or lounger.

The hire car is a worryingly battered piece of shit.

I'm being churlish but there's a long 5 days stretching out in front of me.

Honestly some stories of shit holidays would help!

“if your scared mother fucker go to church”

In my head I heard that to the tune of "If you're happy and you know it, clap your hands" (which did lend your story a slightly weirder but quaintly innocent vibe).

Yes last October Budva in Montenegro. Awful and filthy overdeveloped shit show. Stank of urine, rubbish everywhere, no streetlights. Really dodgy vibe to the whole place and really unfriendly people also was very expensive. Couldn't wait to come home.

Yes. Sitting on the beach at Woolacombe enveloped in light drizzle in August with 2 small children.

Paid a ridiculous amount (more than we would usually pay and definitely not worth it) to go to an all inclusive for two weeks. DD became really poorly with a chest infection day 1, I got flu midway through the first week, there was an unseasonable heat wave and it was 47 degrees. A kid had an accident in the pool which was like a big lagoon pool and they closed it so you couldn’t even get in the cool off. Air con in our room didn’t work and on the way home our first plane was cancelled… next plane was diverted to another part of the UK and we had to hire a car to drive 4.5 hours to the original airport to pick up our car, which when we got there had a flat tyre.

Our dog sitter was very annoyed and not understanding that we were so late and our dog was around for a few hours of her next booking and promptly refused to have our dog again.

it was pretty rubbish all round 😂

Most holidays, I think I just like it at home 😀

Most of them. I don't really like going on holiday.

"For night time noise I defy anyone to beat Barcelona. The bin lorries come round at about 4am and the guys get extra money if they bang and shout loud enough to be heard five streets away. That is the only possible explanation."

So true in tenerife! Earplugs didn't even block it out.. and the bloody reverse beeper.
We had been to lanzarote the year before with very peaceful bin men and only heard crashing waves

We did caravan holidays every summer when I was younger. One year my dad chose a site in the middle of nowhere, with no facilities, for 2 weeks. He did it on purpose so we'd switch off electronics and just enjoy nature. But there was very little to enjoy, and every second dragged.

I always have ' problems' at the airport with my passport or boarding card through machines when everyone else just sail by !
I agree that holidays are sometimes not worth the hassle

We had one at Christmas in the UK. Baby dd vomited first night and by Christmas eve everyone was puking all over including 3yo dd all over her bed. Didn't even cook Christmas lunch.. I had back pain so bad I was crying trying to comfort baby in a sling. We left early and baby dd screamed for hours and I realised she had puss pouring from her ear. Then started a long 3 years of ear infection, sepsis etc.

Corfu on a flight/hotel package. Hotel was filthy and several of us were very ill. Sued the travel company and they settled just before the court hearing.

We've had some very rainy holidays, both home and abroad, and the odd bit of dodgy accommodation, and we've also had the odd day or two when someone (or everyone!) needs to be confined to barracks in easy reach of the toilet. But by far the worst annoyance has been other holidaymakers. We have stayed in lovely peaceful small hotels where most guests were quiet adults, and the few babies/young kids were most definitely of the seen and not heard variety, only to have the ambiance shattered by yobbish unruly families, who hog the pool and splash everyone, and who can't communicate unless it is at top volume. One mother made an effort to control her daughter, yelling at her "Dakota-Marie DON'T do that!" every five minutes, and aside from that, did nothing to actually stop Dakota-effing-Marie.

Isle of Wight- noticed both DC had nits in the 2nd day so spent 2 days de licing them and us (just in case), also wasn’t keen on the Isle of Wight.

Wales- rain….rain and….beast from the east 😬, dd slipped on the decking and refused to walk for the rest of the week. Kids stayed in the car whilst I got out and took photos of places to make it look like we had a great time.

Egypt was the worst. Amazing diving and the valley of the kings is spectacular but I got spat on, insulted, scammed every single day. I was dressed deliberately in long sleeves and flowy trousers but turns out ( our hired guide said) I look Egyptian due to my very mixed heritage. My DH is white so the men on the streets decidedly I was a local whore he'd hired. Nice. Never going back

Don't much like France with small children either tbh. The restaurants only being open from 8pm is a bit of a limitation with 2 kids under 5. Much prefer Spain, Italy and Greece.

This sounds a bit dark fetched. No way would two 70yo's be accidently booked into an 18-30's resort (and isn't San Antonio in Ibiza?)

Although my own story sounds far fetched anyway so hey ho.

2 weeks on an Island off the cost of Venezuela. Rained for 12 of 14 days which meant most of the excursions were cancelled (and we'd booked several the highlight being a trip to the Angel Falls - everything was cancelled and the backlog meant we got to do only one of our trips which was a catamaran and was the only redeeming thing about the trip! But we missed all the main events - Angel Falls and Piranha fishing and a rainforest hike etc..) Weather affected electricity and we had regular and prolonged power outages. Whole complex was tiled and became a death trap with all the wet surfaces, every morning there was a new person with a moon boot or crutches where they'd had a fall.
The couple above us alternated with screaming matches or loud sex. So even sitting on the balcony was painful.
Food was shit, the AI booze was shit. I ended up drinking local vodka and fake coke from lunchtime onwards so I'd be asleep by 9pm.
Beach (on the two days we had decent weather) was manned on either side by security guards to protect us from being robbed by bandito's
We decided on one wet day to go into the capital and the taxi driver was swigging rum! We'd actually been told on the coach journey in that drink driving was not illegal. The capital was a shit hole.

One flight a week and no chance of leaving early

Went with a BF who was boring as fuck.

Oh and this was over Christmas and NY.

Awful, awful, awful.

** The weather was unseasonal and they had more rain during our stay than they usually do between Oct-Mar in total.

As a rather naive 20something I agreed to go for a relaxing week in the sun with a friend from work. I'd only ever been out of the UK a couple of times (with my parents) so took my friend's word for it when she said she knew the perfect place to go. It sounded perfect- lovely beaches, small town, plenty of shops/restaurants etc. We even pre-booked an excursion for our first night there- dinner and dancing at a millionaire's seafront villa. I anticipated a rather sophisticated evening sampling local food and wine with a view out to sea. Just the way to start a relaxing week in a beautiful location.

We actually ended up in Magaluf. The sophisticated villa evening was actually and 18-30s style piss up with a few dodgy looking burgers and chips followed by encouragement to drink shots and 'games' that were just a thinly veiled excuse for grotty teenage lads to touch women inappropriately, get all the women topless and get everyone as pissed as possible. Which was bad enough but the coach back to town at 3am was as terrible as you would imagine. Friend threw herself in to the festivities and hooked up with some lad. After that, she came back to our hotel at around lunch time each day to sleep off her hangover by the pool. It became pretty clear that her intention was to be with the lad from day 1 or some other bloke every night. I had no interest in doing likewise so I basically spent a week alone at a crappy hotel occasionally seeing my friend if she decided to come back to get changed or sleep off a hangover.

If it happened nowadays I would go home or find a better hotel and go sightseeing on my own. It was totally unexpected because at home friend was a very sensible, rather straight-laced young professional.

Cape Verde, OP?

Yes, when I was a teenager my parents booked a holiday to Ibiza - they were looking for one of those chic, quiet, resorts somewhere like Santa Eulalia and the travel agent booked us into a party resort in Playa d'en Bossa. It was miserable. SO loud, terrible food, nowhere near anything we wanted to do either. I remember there was a girl my age there (14-ish) who had a belly button piercing and used to smoke cigarettes and drink cocktails by the pool with her mum I was 😮.

This was in about 1999 so we'd only just got the internet and my DM didn't think to double check what the travel agent was selling us.

It’s not that it was a terrible holiday, it’s just the one I least enjoyed.

A big group of us went to Tenerife for 2 weeks when when we were a lot younger. We were a bunch of 18 year olds who’d never been on a girls holiday before. Super cheap package deal 18-30s. Half of us didn’t know each other & although they were nice enough people, we ended up naturally splitting into two groups and doing things separately. It was a bit awkward sometimes and 2 weeks was way too long, plus the apartment was rank.

Having said that, we made friends with a group from Liverpool a few doors down and they were a scream. Definitely made the holiday for me and I ended up staying in touch with them for a good few years before we lost contact (this was early 00s pre Facebook!)

Kusadasi many years ago! It was like stepping back into biblical times. 2 very long weeks of a filthy hotel, we went down to breakfast in the morning to find the bare chested waiter sleeping on a couch…he was having a stretch and a good scratch at his unbelievable hairy chest whilst taking our order 🤢 could not wait to get on the plane home…

@notprincehamlet hahaha loving this picture to so accurately represent Norfolk- this is a local shop for local people!!

Babymoon in Southern France, end of March.

Friends live there and said it should be pleasant with high teens, low twenties.

It was, for 2 days. Then we had frost, snow, rain.

The gite was freezing and we had mice. The beds were a nightmare.

I sat in the restaurants and really wanted the delicious food I knew I wasn‘t allowed to eat. Steak frites really got old. We were fairly rural so no Italien, Thai or anything outside French brasseries.

DH got food poisoning.

We actually looked into flying home but we had made plans to see the friends and they shuffled around commitments so we decided to stick it out.

"Luxury" holiday in Oman.
It was like the surface of Mars.

My worst holiday was a wood cabin near a fishing lake in Yorkshire.
The wood inside was plastic, the carpet was nylon pink swirls which matched the pink nylon bedsheets. The kitchen was sticky pine with grubby cupboards.
I was heaving when I saw the cooker. Husband and kids didn’t mind, they went off fishing and thought it was great. I cried every day.

A luxury holiday where a family member did nothing but moan about everything.

We were incredibly privileged to be able to have such an amazing holiday and to visit so many beautiful places, but no, I had to endure moaning about the airport, the air con, the food, the drink, the entertainment, the heat, the expectation that they walk more than ten metres, walk up a hill, be spoken to in a foreign language and on and on.

Thank fuck I had a good relationship with the person I shared a room with or I’d have gone loopy.