RANT. Five hundred fucking quid for one month energy and a husband who keeps putting the fucking heating on.

[IncompleteSenten]

£477 and some change. This month's gas and electric bill. It's normally up to fifty quid either side of 300 which is bad enough but this one fucking hurt! Yes this is each month, not quarter. Month. 31 days. For a little 3 bed semi.

My husband puts the heating on if you so much as blow in his fucking face. I've been begging him to put a fucking jumper on. I keep turning the heating off. He turns it back on.

I submitted the meter readings on the 1st as always and this month's bill is as above. Nearly 500 quid. I nearly cried. I finally got him to agree that we have to reduce our usage and to keep the heating off during the day after we got this bill. We've agreed it before after bills at the top end of 350 yet somehow it goes back to oh it was cold, oh the cat was cold, oh just for an hour... Then before I know it, the heating's back on to 30 all day and night .

I've bought everyone thermal long johns, furry slippers and those big blankets that are jumpers with hoods.

I turned the heating off this morning and he turned the fucker back on because - and I quote - "it's a bit cold".

Yes it's a bit cold, arseface. Put an extra layer on 🤬 and fucking deal with it!

I'll calm down of course but right now I'm so angry that my stomach feels like it's on fire. Yes I can pay it, we're very lucky in that respect I know. It's not that I can't find five hundred quid from anywhere, I can do some jiggery pokery and sort it, it's that I've got to pull five hundred quid out of my arse because mr neshbastard refuses to deal with a bit of a chill.

30?? I know people feel the cold differently but I've never heard anyone have it that high. 30 is uncomfortably hot in any situation.

To answer the questions
I'm housebound through disability. I'm self employed and work from home (actual self employment. Pays the bills with small tax credit severe disability element entitlement) our two adult sons live here too. Both disabled. One severely and will never live independently. He's prone to violent outbursts. One will but will need an eye kept on him as he's socially very naive and gets overwhelmed and stuff.

My husband can't be in paid employment because he's the carer for all three of us, including physical help, dispensing medication, restraint when unavoidable etc etc.

He's from east Africa but he's lived in the UK since 1991 but never given himself the opportunity to adjust because he won't stop keeping the bloody heating on max!!

I turn the heating off because we've agreed that it needs to stay off. When the bill comes in he's fully on board and agrees we need to do it but then it's a bit nippy and he's all oh fuck it it's cold.

30 is really high especially if he doesn't have mobility problems, can you wean him down - 28, then 26 etc? or have it always on at 22 so it never gets chilly.
Personally I'd hate to live in that heat but were all different

Bloody hell! That's 7 months electric and almost a year of gas for us, three bed semi.

I'm surprised your bill is only £500 if the heating is set at 30 degrees. But the bill needs to be his problem not yours.

I would turn it down little by little say to 29 and when he hasn't noticed, down another one etc etc

30C is just pure madness. 21 C is the upper norm. And yes, totally agree with you, put layers on, joggers and socks. Ecological disaster as well as massively expensive, to expect to live in no socks, shorts and a t-shirt through winter.

More answers - we live in the peak park in a village that gets snowed in and is on high ground so it does get cold.
I'm 50, he's 60. He's about 12 stone at 5ft 8 so not underweight.

I already bought a little electric heater for him to pop on right next to him. He has it on as well as the heating!
Is he ill? Fuck knows. I have pleaded, actually pleaded with him to go to the doctor for a full mot but he refuses. He has significant hand tremors but won't acknowledge it even when I say look at your hand right now - you're shaking! It's either oh I'm cold or oh I'm hungry or oh I'm tired or my personal favourite - no I'm not. I even sank so low as to try some shitty nasty emotional blackmail - if you won't go for yourself then please go for my sake and our sons. We need you so much. Still no.

I just needed to rant in order to be able to calm down. I'm already feeling better about it so thank you. It helps so much to be able to express my frustration freely.

Yes I've done the whole turn it down slowly so he adjusts. He just turns it back up again.

I've calmed down enough now that I've moved into the post-rant guilt portion.

30?! I couldn't bear that. There is someone in my house 24/7 as my DD26 is disabled. I don't scrimp on heating because it makes her worse and O work bloody hard so we don't scrimp. Over the winter months it's risen to £200. Normal around £145.
He is ridiculous and imo will make you all ill in those temperatures!

The cap doesn't mean that's the most you will pay! It means that's the most their average consumer will pay!

Here the kw. I think I added it up correctly. I was wrong about the meter submission date,bit was the 4th not the 1st.

It could actually feel colder if it is struggling to get to 30, so a more variable temperature, than if it was at a lower consistent temperature. Same with a small heater when you move away from it you feel colder than if you didn't have it. I would set it to a lower temperature that the boiler can maintain easily, then give him an electric throw instead as they cost pennies to run. Jumper, wool socks and slippers too.

Your rant was beautiful op, esp t’the cat looked cold’ wtf?

I wondered if he was from a warm country (I’m WI ancestry). He needs to go doc.

and I’m so sorry that bill would have me bawling.

Honestly, at this point I think you might need to find a way of locking down the thermostat so that the only person who can change it is you. How to do that depends on your heating setup, obviously.

Electric heating is far, far more expensive than gas. You need to get rid of that electric heater for a start

Our monthly bill is 460. And that's with the heating on only for few hours morning and night. House is like an ice box. I'd be going mad if it was on at 30 degrees and my husband was still saying it was cold.

30c is nuts. That's not comfortable room temperature, that's a sweltering summer's day temperature. A degree or two at the most either side of 20 is room temperature.

I wouldn't be comfortable at 15c and neither would I be comfortable at 30c. What is wrong with him - does he have serious medical issues? Or is he from the hottest place on the planet?

@onetwonetoo

10 degrees and no heating? I'd be so cold I couldn't get out of bed! My home needs to be above 20 degree's with heat teck and a jumper on to function.

Mine is never as high as some of these scary sounding bills and I often have my heating on from 9am-9pm. Mind you I pay by direct debit the same amount each month so even in summer I'm paying about £200. Could you switch your billing method?

But also yes 30 is insane i wouldn't be able to breathe!!

Could you get a Hive or similar? You can then hide the thermostat/controller unit when you turn it down so he can't find it to turn it up/on. And have the app on your phone so only you can access it with the password.

I mean, i wouldn't usually suggest such things as it's a form of control/abuse, but then again so is ignoring your pleas and running up massive bills 🤷🏻‍♀️

The cap sets the ceiling on the unit price. The £2k or whatever is the cost of an AVERAGE number of units at the "capped* unit cost. Eg a small flat would expect to pay less. But if you use more units than average, your bill will be above average too.

@RosieAway

the cap is the most you can pay for the units you use and the standing charge, so say 28p a unit for elec and xx for standing charge. Whilst the standing charge will say the same the cost of fuel will entirely depend on how much you use, usage is not capped

...gotta say though, "the cat looked cold" is kind of unintentionally hilarious, although if faced with that IRL I would probably point out with a voice pH of1 that if Pussums is cold they will simply grow a thicker coat to compensate, and perhaps he should learn from their fine example.

Tbf I have often justified putting the heating on to myself if the dog is curled up like a mouse.....she must be chilly if she's curled up.......😬