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Original poster

Age to leave siblings alone

31 replies

Lastminutebride · 31/01/2024 06:36

Ive got 2 daughters that are 7 years apart in age. I’m thinking we’re starting to reach an age where they can be left alone together for longer. I won’t say their ages as don’t want to sway peoples thoughts.
They’re both sensible and I currently leave them together for a couple of hours but wondered what everyone’s else’s thoughts were.

What ages would you be happy leaving them both together for:

  • a few hours
  • a day
  • an evening until 10pm
  • walking home from school together
OP posts:
PlasticSurgeonWithASidelineAsAStuntWoman · 31/01/2024 06:48

The younger one must be pretty young if you are thinking about them walking home from school together so I imagine I’d think too young for the older one to be taking responsibility.

Experts recommend that: A child should be at least 12 years old before being left alone at home and at least 15 years old before they can care for a younger sibling. Children should not be left alone overnight until the oldest child is at least 16 years old.

unlikelychump · 31/01/2024 06:50

13 and 5 - no way
17 and 10 -yes, but I would probably leave the 10yo alone anyway.

Redcliffe1 · 31/01/2024 06:52

I have a similar age gap and mine are 16 and 9. I have left them very occasionally for an hour or do during the day - I think the first time was about 3 years ago. Last Friday was the first time I left them on an evening- 6-9.30 and I was 6 minutes away.

I guess I would leave them for a day if I really needed to (I'm lucky that I can work from home during the holidays so it's never really come up) but only once the eldest was 16. Hope this helps.

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Ohdearwhatnow4 · 31/01/2024 06:54

Not sure if would unless emergency. Why does a older sibling want to look after a child 7 years younger. If for a few hours maybe at 15. But if its right for your family your know when

BendingSpoons · 31/01/2024 07:00

At around 7 and 14 I would let them walk home from school (if school allowed it. Ours does but a lot expect at 16yo to pick up). I would also leave them for a couple of hours in the day and maybe early evening, depending on what the 14yo thought.

Until 10pm - maybe start in the summer when it is lighter, but I'd be happier with 15/16. All day again happier at about 16 and 9.

Thus is based on my experience as a sensible teenager happy to look after a younger sibling and hating babysitters. Also having a sensible 8yo myself. But remembering feeling a bit odd home alone at night. Others will feel differently of course.

Mindymomo · 31/01/2024 07:01

Age doesn’t really come into it, it’s how mature they are to manage what you are suggesting. I have a 4 year gap with my 2 sons, so was able to leave them alone together once the eldest was 11. The youngest was told he had to ask his brother for everything, which he did anyway. My eldest son was very mature and usually if I left them for a few hours, they would be fine.

SallyWD · 31/01/2024 07:02

As long as the eldest is mature and sensible then around 14 and 7. I used to babysit children that age when I was 14.

mponder · 31/01/2024 07:05

I'd say no as it's unfair on the older one having to care for a sibling.

Redcliffe1 · 31/01/2024 07:20

My eldest likes being left in charge! If he asks I will pay - £3 an hour.

Universalsnail · 31/01/2024 07:57

For me the youngest would need to be 8.

Flatpackedboxes · 31/01/2024 07:59

14 and 7?

ShadowOfTheSeason · 31/01/2024 08:01

I was also going to say 14 and 7.

AndThatWasNY · 31/01/2024 08:04

We left ours from the youngest being about 8 for a few hours (eldest 13)
Overnight from 12 and 17.

Anotherdayanotherdollar · 31/01/2024 08:05

If the older child was happy to watch the younger one I'd say 7 and 14 for a few hours at home. Probably 15/8 for a day, 16/9 for an overnight. Walk home from school might depend on the school. I'd let my 7yr old walk home with an sibling even 2yrs older

Anjea · 31/01/2024 09:17

It's pretty hard to say if we don't know their ages. Mine were okay from about 11/12 for short periods of time.

GaroTheMushroom · 31/01/2024 09:19

That’s quite a big age gap so I would say 7 and 14 as well before I would consider it

PuttingDownRoots · 31/01/2024 09:25

Depending on maturity and personality clashesI would expect a teenager to be able to baby sit from 14/15yo, on and out the house. . Exact details depending on what they are comfortable with.

AmyandPhilipfan · 31/01/2024 09:58

I used to help my friend babysit her twin sisters when they were 6 and we were 13. We weren't allowed to leave the house with them and were only allowed to make them (and us) very simple lunches. That was for about 5 hours a day during school holidays. I loved it. I think she was allowed to look after them alone in some circumstances but she and her mum preferred her to have a friend to help.

Original poster
Lastminutebride · 31/01/2024 19:25

i didnt want to sway peoples answers by saying their ages straight away.

they are currently 7 and 14. Both are very sensible. The 7 year old would be happy occupying her self and wouldn’t need a lot of looking after, just someone more responsible with her in case of emergency etc

7 year old is more than capable of fending for herself in terms of food/drinks etc

i leave them together for a couple of hours but feel they’re reaching an age where they’d be happy to stay alone longer but wasn’t sure what the guidance was.

I was hoping in the next year or two that the eldest can pick youngest up from school on her way past and they walk home together. You heard school is nearby, about a 10 minute walk

OP posts:
Original poster
Lastminutebride · 31/01/2024 19:26

And I also remember babysitting from about 14. I used to look after a child for whole days during the holidays when her parents were at work.

OP posts:
GaroTheMushroom · 31/01/2024 19:45

Lastminutebride · 31/01/2024 19:26

And I also remember babysitting from about 14. I used to look after a child for whole days during the holidays when her parents were at work.

Times have changed though my sister use to babysit 3 kids overnight in the 90s when she was 13!

Lizzieregina · 31/01/2024 19:52

I was going to say 14 and 7 more or less with the caveat that you know your kids best.

I’d say a little younger on the top end if the age difference was a couple of years instead of 7.

I do childcare right now for a 13 and 10 year old and they really don’t even need me except to drive the older one home from school. They’re perfectly capable of managing themselves and warming up food etc, but they need a driver! And also it’s not legal to leave them alone where I live (14 is the official age).

Kalevala · 31/01/2024 19:52

Lastminutebride · 31/01/2024 06:36

Ive got 2 daughters that are 7 years apart in age. I’m thinking we’re starting to reach an age where they can be left alone together for longer. I won’t say their ages as don’t want to sway peoples thoughts.
They’re both sensible and I currently leave them together for a couple of hours but wondered what everyone’s else’s thoughts were.

What ages would you be happy leaving them both together for:

  • a few hours
  • a day
  • an evening until 10pm
  • walking home from school together
  • a few hours - 6 and 13
  • a day - 7 and 14
  • an evening until 10pm - 7 and 14
  • walking home from school together - 6 and 13
Kalevala · 31/01/2024 19:55

I was looking after a sibling occasionally for a work day at 3 and 14.

PuttingDownRoots · 31/01/2024 19:58

For school... my kids school allows Y5&Y6 to be picked up by a sibling from the Secondary school... this is also the age they can walk home alone.

(ETA... Thats 9-11yos being picked up)