Thread 12 - TalkLair: “I say we take off and nuke the entire site from orbit. It's the only way to be sure.”

[Kucinghitam]

(Previous thread 11).

The days are gradually growing longer, but the worst of the winter weather is not yet behind us. In the TalkLair, we remain hunkered down keeping cosy and warm. The hearth is glowing, the walls covered in dubious artwork, books by non-approved authors line the shelves, rugs are down on the floors (and assorted pets curled up on them).

We just won’t mention the gnawed bones of our prey over there in the corner of the cave…

I also feel the same about crowds, used to love a crowded pub, but these days I can't bear them and just want to get out. Is it an age thing, do you suppose?

Is it an age thing, do you suppose?

I guess, in the sense that if you're lucky you get to be comfortable with who you are. I'm 60 this year and with the best will in the world I think I've got possibly 15, and maybe 20 years left if I'm really lucky. I don't say that in a morbid way, I'm pretty happy, certainly much happier than I ever thought I would be. Why spend what time you have left doing shit that doesn't fill you with joy?

I spent quite a bit of one of the sessions at today's conference trying to work out where I'd seen one of the speakers before. Name didn't ring a bell, not someone with a big media presence, face didn't look familiar (but that's a common problem with faces, for me), but there was a strong 'I do know her' vibe.

Eventually worked out she sounded exactly like Squeaky Dinosaur.

I had a thing like that happen about 30 years ago. It was a work induction day and there was this woman in the office there. We both looked at each other and said 'I know you' but neither of us could come up with any place or time we could have met. It was very disorienting as we were both convinced we knew each other.

Ha! I am actually a vocal dead ringer for Delia Smith. Maybe it was her, @NoBinturongsHereMate ?

She looked more like Delia than she did like you, but not very much like either.

Fortunately she was not one of the ones intoning the TWAW, TMAM, NBPE mantra - I don't think I could have handled the disconnect.

I was on a plane from Newcastle to Aberdeen years ago and I was sure I knew the bloke across the aisle, thinking that he was a manager at the same company. I kept looking at him out of the corner of my eye

Eventually, I realised that he was Kenneth Clark and looked at him directly. Plainly terrified, he buried his head in the Daily Mail. I left him alone.

I am not a fan of crowds. I once got stuck and unable to move in a huge crowd in Germany, all of which were heading for ferries across Lake Constance. We had the kids with us and only DS1 was tall enough to be seen. DD was only 8 and I had firm hold of her, and DH was carrying DS2, who was only 5. It was quite terrifying.

Oh and@duc748 I am about to turn 74 and I think I've got maybe 15 years left, 20 if I'm lucky, so you may have more time than you think.

But... the rock'n'roll lifestyle.... 😀I am very much thinking in terms of 'how many good years left', though. To be frank, quality of life for most people in their nineties (and probably eighties too) is pretty rubbish. A question of so far, so good, more or less.

It kind of depends on what you mean by quality of life. Yes there are things my 81 year old DH can't do now that he could do 20 years ago, but we still enjoy our lives and we do what we feel like doing, or do what we used to do but do it more slowly (oo-er missus!)

The thing that is likely to make most difference to our lives, if it comes, is not being able to drive. DH is a very good and safe driver still, with good reactions, but I think we might have problems (or be charged a high price) if we needed to rent a car with him as a driver. It would be quite limiting if we were medically unable to drive, but we'd still be able to get around on public transport or by Uber in this city and by train or plane between cities.

Absolutely, and this is one of the benefits of living in a city, I guess. As Mick and Keef said, hours are like diamonds; don't let them waste. 😃

Today I discovered one of the rare benefits of age, which is worth passing on. If someone in the house is aged over 70, many fire brigades will send handsome firemen round for a "home safety visit" which includes general advice + fitting smoke alarms. As ours was at least 10 years old (and very probably a lot older) this seemed like a plan and two lovely chaps came round within a couple of days. We now have two spanking new alarms - FREE! - and installed where they should be. They don't do CO monitors, but advised on who sells them locally and where to put it. (No, not there - shame on you for even thinking it!)

So it's worth doing if you're approaching ancientness, or telling an AgedP about it.

They also cheered me up no end by commenting that our house was one of the least cluttered they'd seen. I hadn't mentioned clutter, so this was spontaneous. How I preened, while secretly thinking "Shit! How bad are other people's houses?"

I couldn't let them in mine at the moment. Chemo fog and exhaustion means that clutter has accumulated until I've got more energy. I low key hate it but I'm hoping it will only be a few days more, although I've got an infection right now and I'm on antibiotics so it might be a little longer. I don't feel "ill" just tired.

I keep thinking of this thing and I thought of posting it on the general women's rights thread but I'm not sure it belongs there and I don't want to start a thread about it, so I'll post it here because it bothers me.

Ever since everything that went on with Johnny Depp I went completely and utterly off him. I was never a big fan. I didn't actively dislike him just thought he was a bit of dick with his overspending and obsessions with men who were close to or actively dodgy AF (hello Marilyn Manson). It could be argued that there was equal blame between him and Amber Heard but the emails he sent, the texts, the pathetic victim he played and the fact that a British court found that calling him a wife beater was fair. Not a nice man. And then. There was an article in Vanity Fair - don't know if it's in the actual magazine but it's online - about him and his new friendship. His friendship with Mohammad Bin Salman, the notorious MBS, that lovely chap who had journalist Jamal Khashoggi murdered and butchered. He's spending lots of time in Saudi Arabia talking about how much it's changed and the Saudis are probably going to pay him millions to be a "brand" ambassador for the country. To call him pond scum is to be unfair to pond scum which in smaller amounts does serve some purpose.

Anyway, I've got that off my chest. Thanks for listening. As you were.

I hope the antibiotics kick in quickly, @MouseMinge

Our sitting room (where we were when the uncluttered remark was made) is currently piled high with cardboard boxes and computer equipment and features multiple extension leads. Theoretically this is temporary, while I set up MrG's new PC, but a month on I'm losing the will to live and am idly contemplating running away to sea. His current setup (in another room) is, frankly, a proper fire hazard, with ancient equipment that hums alarmingly and more plugs and 4-way extension leads than anyone needs. I have removed the printer (which he never uses) and connected it to my own machine, but that's just ONE plug fewer.

I have boxes too. A couple of deliveries, my laziness in using the Stanley knife to break them down and put them in the recycling and a sink load of washing up just makes everything meh. There are more than boxes.

That said, @Gonners if you have all of the boxes it does make you wonder what they sometimes walk into.

Ooh! I'm off to the National Theatre in May to see a play called Underdog: The Other Bronte.

I'm a big fan of Anne Bronte and The Tenant of Wildfell Hall is my favourite Bronte novel. I think Charlotte was jealous of her and lessened her after Anne's death so I'm majorly excited to see the play!

The offending boxes are all on a sofa, so I think they were mainly surprised that the floors are clear, so we can walk around the place in the dark without tripping over piles of random debris. Also, buying phone chargers second-hand over the internet is apparently a red-flag, in the same way that deliberately setting fire to your own hair might be a problem.

They didn't investigate the cupboard/glory-hole full of "shit to be sorted out one day", though! But they did make me think perhaps I could just clear it out, as displacement activity for MrG's effing computer.

Hadn't heard about Depp shilling for the Saudis, but can't say I'm surprised.

David Beckham also shills for the Saudis and like Depp I can't help but think how much fucking money do you need?

Yeah, was going to say the same. Got no time for any of them.

Meanwhile, the doghouse thread in AIBU is good fun.

The doghouse thread made me buy Jaffa cakes yesterday. They are considerably smaller than they use to be.

Today was a really good day despite me feeling ropey tired. Went to my local for a little thing in remembrance of Mr Snoop who died three years ago today. Lots of people turned up and the music was great. I only stayed for about two and a half hours as I needed to come home and nap and I was also in danger of becoming the cancer centre of attention.

Two v GOOD things. There was a bull terrior calle Alfie who I went to sit on the floor with and meet. He was of course a darling and accepted all the love. I then turned to start talking to a friend. About two minutes later Alfie has his front paws on my shoulders and is assaulting me with kisses. It was delightful.

The BEST thing? I met my great niece! We're not biologically related but as she's my niece's daughter (also not biologically related) and she insists I'm her auntie, etc. She's absolutely beautiful. I held her for ages and then when she went back to her mum she just smiled and smiled and smiled at me. She's 9 weeks old. After Monday week I won't be able to see her for six to eight weeks so to finally hold her. Oh the joy. I was literally shivering with happiness when I saw her come in. V. v. v. V happy!

Bizarre event of the day: went to Argos for a carbon monoxide alarm , used an in-store terminal to order and pay and it was at the counter within about 2 minutes. I handed the shopping bag to designated packhorse MrGon, who held it open and I saw the lad on the till put the correct item in.

I can't have been paying attention after that, because when we got home, the bag contained two items: tiny CO monitor and a largeish cardboard box containing something called an OPTI exercise ball. I definitely hadn't ordered that, so we wondered if Argos was handing them out at random. But looking at the receipt I saw I'd paid £9 for it. So we took it back.

At this point it got weird, as the young woman on the till absolutely REFUSED TO BELIEVE that I hadn't ordered it. Apparently I must have done. I said the only possibility I could think of was that someone on the terminal just before I got there had put it in the basket and then walked away. No, I didn't check the basket before paying ... because I had only put one item in. That's a mistake I won't make again!

This, apparently, was unconvincing and she chuntered on for quite a while before grudgingly refunding £9 to my card. If I'd just told her I'd changed my mind - the box hadn't been opened (except by her!) and 3 hours was well within their 30-day return policy - it would have been sorted out in seconds. So this was all my fault.