I am really really really fed up of January

[Doesthatmakemecrazy]

Feel free to grumble with me. Or tell me to pull myself together. Or suggest how to get motivated!

My pointless grumble…

i can’t afford nights out. Or days out for that matter. It’s dark early and there are only so many cosy nights in I can enjoy.
I can’t be bothered wondering into town because it’s all the same places.
I can’t get into books.
Have watched a few good films but can’t find many I want to watch.
Cant work up the motivation to do much of anything.

I solved my January blues by moving to the Southern Hemisphere. The only downside is that my July birthday is now in the middle of winter! My husband's birthday was yesterday though, so he gets the summer birthday now. It was 37 degrees here yesterday, so we had a pool party. I do not miss the UK winter at all!

And we're not even halfway through. It's so depressing.

Likewise, I dont miss Sydney winters huddled under three wool blankets from vinnies in a house that is impossible to heat. UK winters I find much easier!

Make sure you get outside for an hour every day before dark. Longer if you can and the sun is out (next few days forecast to be clear and sunny around my way - check your forecast). Even on a grey day, going for a walk is like medicine. You will never regret it and you'll get home feeling warmed up, energised and maybe with some new ideas about things you want to do.

Yeah I was cold my first winter here, as I was in an old rental house. Fortunately, more modern houses have adequate heating/cooling/insulation.

I could never afford a modern house, and had a sibling in the same situation until very recently with a young child. I wouldn't go back.

I'm sorry that you're feeling like this @Doesthatmakemecrazy January can be a tough month. Can you change your mindset about it, or reframe it in any way?
Some thoughts (apologies as the first one is very harsh, but it often helps me see things more clearly):
*if this was the last January that you had, what would you do differently?
*read Nigel Slater's Christmas Chronicles cook book (random, but bear with!). At the start he talks about people hating winter because we expect it to behave like something else - spring or summer! Once you take winter/January for what it is, could you enjoy it more?
*can you embrace the month by writing a mini bucket list of things to do? A walk in the woods on a crisp day, followed by a nice coffee & cake somewhere like a NT property or stately home? Visit a nearby city/town & explore it as though you are visiting from abroad - what is the history of the place, where should you visit, where are the local, independent cafes?
*are you close enough to a beach? Can you drive there to watch the sun rise of sun set? Can you take a posh picnic & flask to enjoy?
*can you challenge yourself to do something unusual? How about taking yourself to the cinema alone, or out for lunch alone?
*is there something that you've always wanted to do, but don't have the time for? Is this the month that you look into that hobby?
*are there any life admin type tasks that will make you feel better for doing (reviewing direct debits & finances, doing a huge house declutter - Marie Kondo style?) These are things that weigh heavy but once they are done, you get a great sense of achievement.
*Look & book a holiday.
*Do you like writing, reading or jounalling? Can you get into those? Is there a nice cosy bookshop with a cafe that you can sit in to start writing a journal?
*Do you like podcasts? Have a look for one that you find interesting or motivational & listen whilst your cooking/cleaning.
*You said you can't get into reading, but could you do something that's a page a day that's inspirational/motivational? "The Daily Stoic" by Ryan Holiday is a short 1 page a day book but has some great motivational thoughts. Or Brianna Weist's 101 Essays is very good with wise insights & makes you look at life differently.

Finally, my last suggestion would be to join a free, live online talk that Paul Mort is giving on Thursday 18th Jan, 18.30 - 20.00. He's a bit sweary, but so good at getting you to look at where you're at & how you can shift your thinking. "The session is called How to make 2024 your best year ever." L ook at his Instagram or Facebook pages to sign up - it's free via Zoom. That man has got some energy, but he's had a tricky time in the past. Very inspirational.

Spend all January in dread. Knowing February will be worse.

Oh I love this. Going to save this and read it over when Jan feels gloomy!

This is a great post!

Thank you this is a great post. I should definitely be embracing life and making the most as I had some good health news so I’m not sure why the slump.
I had an early walk this morning, left in the dark and it was a lovely time to be out. Washed car on way back.
Its a start.

Have to say I gave the stupidly busy gym a miss today and went out for a bike ride instead. It was bloody hardwork and cold but I enjoyed being out in the fresh air and sun. It has lifted my mood a bit.

I was aiming to be helpful. Cold is annoying for others, and the constant need to be cooler than anyone else is comfortable was one of the more annoying menopause symptoms pre HRT…

Yeah I do know that... but the type of job I do can only be done in certain cities in the UK really, and the vast majority of jobs are in London. Probably 90% of them. Couldn't afford to live there sadly. But then again I did choose a career that paid less money but one that I'd enjoy and would never be boring. What's that phrase again "love what you do and you'll never work a day in your life?" That's me. Except in January. And February really.

Mind you, I had less than an hour commute until they relocated to the arse end of London. I didn't choose that and neither did the hundreds of other staff who now have to travel for bloody hours.

Anyway, back to hating January...

Quote from article in Guardian today
“There’s something intrinsically cheering about hitting seasonal rock bottom: it couldn’t be any darker, colder, or more miserable. Surely at least we can agree on that?”

@Doesthatmakemecrazy - great quote 😆 It can only get better from here, surely?
It sounds like yesterday was productive for you. Reading your post made me wish I had popped out for an early walk too. The nights start to get lighter now, don't they. I find that to be a huge help. M&S had daffodils in the shop yesterday, so spring can't be far away now. There's light at the end of the tunnel.

I take issue with 'cant get into books'.

Is it the same old stuff? Go to the library or a bookshop or charity shop and get something different to what you usually read. Can be trashy like a celeb biography, or something like a history book etc. Reading really refreshes your mind and it's what this time of year is about, you just need to find the right thing to read.

With the exception of Christmas itself, I find December harder than January. The whole mental load and stress of spending, shopping and preparing for Christmas. The endless darkness, the organising, the social events, work events, family gatherings the expectation to see everyone even if you are on your knees with tiredness and the kids have constant lurgy. I enjoy the period of calm that January brings, no expectations, time to myself and the evenings are getting lighter.

Im on my 50th cold of the winter. Every time I get into an exercise or eating routine, I catch a cold and am back to square 1. If this is what 50+ is going to be like, I'm going to have to buy a house in Portugal and go and live there for 3 months!

I'm actually feeling somewhat positive this January, but that's because I spent August - December really unwell signed off work, and have finally in January just gotten a diagnosis and begun treatment, so it feels like a light at the end of an awfully long tunnel. A fresh start after 2023 being so awful.

Not enjoying the dark and cold though. I miss sitting in the garden in the sun, eating dinner on the patio. There's something oddly lonely about winter, even if you spend just as much time with people isn't there?

Alongside my diagnosis of an autoimmune disease however I also found out I'm deficient in Vitamin D. Its probably a large part of why so many of us feel so low in winter. Everyone in the UK should be taking Vitamin D in winter, according to my doctor!

@DaisyCat33 I live in the gloomy north (East Lancs) and a doctor told me last winter that everyone in our area and further north should take vitamin D all the time as we just don't get enough sun and daylight to be able to manufacture our own!!!! I take 2 super strength ones every day now.........

@Bookworm12345 hugest sympathies to you for your loss, mum and dad were both in hospital for most of January last year and we lost mum in early Feb so have an idea of what you're going through. Try to take some time for yourself as well as supporting your mum.

Another one here hoping that January b*&^%rs off asap, it's been so wet and dreary this winter and it's only dried out now so it can get cold and flipping snow! We're saving for a new roof this summer so trips are out of the window at the moment and it's so miserable!

Sorry, just saw this. Don’t let me put you off looking for a new job, op! I left a job I’d been very happy at for a long time for a new challenge. Given that there was nothing wrong with the old job and that I’m not good with change at the best of times, it was inevitable I’d be stressed by it. It’s a me problem, as they say!

It’s always annoying as a runner in January with the sheer amount of new runners around. I like the fact they’ve got into running but I also know that the vast majority will give up by the end of the month. As an avid runner who has done it for years, it’s really grating to have to jump around new runners constantly when it’s usually completely dead on the streets.