I have an older brother who is 40. He studied for his phd until a few years ago and has done very well academically. He is now on a 6 figure salary and is liked at work. If relevant, DH and I are also on a 6 figure salary.
Our parents live abroad and are retired. They are asset-rich but cash poor as they now rely on their pension as their only source of income. Until this year, our parents have always paid for his tickets to come visit or for any holidays. For his last visit, his paid for his own tickets but took absolutely no money with him. He also refused to use his card locally. So, my parents paid for everything including his visit to the dentist, the doctor, blood tests etc.
Our parents gave both of us money for a house deposit. My brother has over £300k in savings. He lives is a house share with other men. He does not drive or own a car. He speaks to my father several times a day - when he wakes up, during his breaks, after work, before going to bed etc. He has no friends.
Why is it my issue? As my parents are getting older, there is more and more pressure on me to assume some "take care of him". A few years ago, I organised a holiday for the family and he was supposed to pay me back for his share. He never did as I "would not miss the money". Every time we go out for lunch, I have to pay the bill. My parents constantly ask me to buy him things.
If money was an issue, I would absolutely pay for things. However, money is not an issue for him. He has more disposable income than I do.
Is he just tight or does he have some undiagnosed issues?