Being approached and being asked if I’m ok

[Riseandshinee]

I have been trying to get 10k steps in a few times a week. I need to be close to home so I walk around the same places for about an hour with music on. I know this is unusual. I don’t drive so can’t go anywhere different. I’ve been approached numerous times and asked if I’m lost/ok when they see me pacing back and forth. and it’s really putting me off. I am extremely socially anxious/avoid people and I don’t know how to make them stop without changing where I go which I can’t do at the moment.

Just tell them you’re exercising, or getting your 10K steps.

People are asking because they are concerned. It is not something you can stop unless you make it painfully obvious you are just exercising.

How close do you need to stay to your house? I think if you're literally just pacing up and down the same road people will think you're in some kind of distress. Could you widen your route just a little?

Yeah so wear work out clothes and if they ask say yeah thanks im ok just need to work out close to home please ignore me!

I would feel.puzzled and unsettled if I noticed a plainly dressed person pacing the same area.

See it as a positive that if you were really in need of help, there are people out there who are kind and want to help you.

Just tell them you’re getting your steps in! No need to explain further!

well done and I hope you can keep it up.

There are youtube videos which focus on doing 10k steps, if you fancy an indoor workout for a change?

Otherwise I agree that wearing obvious exercise clothes/carrying a bottle of water might help.

Get some head and wrist bands, pop some ear buds in and people will likely leave you alone.
Isn't it nice to know people would help if you needed it though?

My dh was frequently stopped by the police when he was running so he got a florescent jacket and running leggings - they aren't florescent, and it stopped happening.

What kind of places?

Can you walk round the block/ in a circular route?

Pacing back and forwards (as you describe) does sound quite unnerving and is probably why people are concerned.

It's really kind that people are showing you concern. I walk a short route 4 times to reach my 10k sometimes. I have found wearing more obvious "work out" clothing helps keep the odd looks away.

Or just use it as a chance for a wee chat. "Yes, thanks for checking on me, just squeezing in some exercise!"

this.

Are you not at least walking around the blocks near your house? Like a 20 minute loop? If you are just pacing back and forth like a caged animal then of course people are going to be concerned, it's not typical behaviour.

You may be making your neighbours feel anxious. If I didn't know someone I may think they were observing in preparation for criminal behaviour.

If you’re literally just walking up and down one road for an extended period of time I can see why that would be really odd and people might question it

Yeah, maybe workout clothes or a hi vis or something would make it more obvious you're on a mission, but if you can tell a few people that you're just exercising but need to stay close to home then I expect word will get around that that's all that's going on.

Maybe you're triggering off their video doorbells... You have a right to exercise outside, stick your chin out and march your arms!

Get an 80s perm and wear a leotard with neon leg warmers

I would work on finding a way to signal that you are exercising rather than pacing around lost or in distress. So as others have already said, wear more sportswear if you can, or hi vis armbands, etc.

If where you're walking is a quite residential area then people will tend to notice someone who is walking around a lot who doesn't appear to be exercising or walking a dog.

I do that too. Nobody has asked if I'm ok but I do worry that my neighbours will think I'm planning on burgling them! We live in a row of houses with no path other than right outside the houses so I either have to pace up and down the path or cross the main road which takes 20 minutes each way.

There was a lady who used to do this at night where I used to live and it turned out she was leaving her children in the home in bed unsupervised so they were right to be concerned.

Assuming this is not what you are doing then resign yourself to a quick 'I'm fine, thanks for asking' and just be glad there are people looking out for one another in your neighbourhood.

Once they've asked once they won't ask again so it's likely to stop soon.

Also the way you move might be what's setting them off. If you're shuffling around hunched over it's not very good exercise. Head up. Move your arms and legs. Dress the part. Put people at their ease. I exercise outdoors (and sometimes have to just go up and down) and even when I've stopped for air when I first started running, no one has ever been concerned about why I'm there. People are naturally suspicious of loiterers though, and if you're loitering, you're not exercising enough! Read up on exercise posture and form to ensure you don't do yourself a mischief.

You can't make them stop but you can practice a confident response with a smile "fine thanks, just getting my steps in!".

Also it won't solve your immediate problem but please do ensure you're being seen by cars. I think non-drivers don't realise just how invisible you are these days to car drivers, when most street lights are lower lighting than they were 10 years ago for some reason so they don't illuminate the spaces between lamp posts very well anymore. A high-vis jacket or something reflective or a head light would be a good shout.

I'd walk to the local park/common and do laps round the edge there. Much less weird. Or walk the roads/alleys in a circular/P-shaped route. If you go exploring you'll find all sorts of tiny local playgrounds/patches of open grassland and walkways between roads/garage blocks/estates that link straight roads into circular routes.

If you live close enough, your local High Street is good for walking up and down without it being obvious, people will just think you're window shopping. Shopping malls too, the smaller ones you can exit to walk round the outside then back in again for another loop, the larger ones usually are set on a triangle anyway.

Small community libraries are usually set in amongst suburbia and aren't busy, if you prefer to be away from people in general, it's somewhere to walk to/from and the bonus is you get a book! I don't know how you'd go about finding one officially, I usually stumble across them by accident whilst wandering around finding out where this or that road goes.

If budget isn't an issue you can walk to the local corner shop for daily odds and ends, it's not as cheap as the supermarket but gives you somewhere to go and you can choose a "local" store that isn't your local one but one further away, to get more steps in. A lot less people at any one time in these small shops too.

There must be something about what you’re doing or the way you’re doing it that makes people think you’re not ok, because it’s not really normal for people to ask.