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Original poster

Did your partners get a card or anything from work when you gave birth?

47 replies

Comff · 22/12/2023 23:44

Not sure whether this is usual or not and need some perspective:

Female partner going off on maternity leave and gets a card and joint whip around gift from the office she works at.

Male partner also taking (paternal) leave, although not as long (6weeks) gets nothing.

Both are in a similar work set up where whip around presents or cards for big birthdays, marriages, etc are the norm.

Thought a card might come after the baby arrived but it’s been a while now and still nothing. Is this usual for men? Did your partners get well wishes from work?

OP posts:
ughChristmas · 23/12/2023 01:14

My DH's workplace always sent a card and flowers.

Floralnomad · 23/12/2023 01:17

When we had our first my husbands colleagues bought some lovely gifts for the baby , he only took a day or two off ( 30 yrs ago ) .

Redglitter · 23/12/2023 01:58

My work always has a collection for a baby when the Dad works with us. I'd think it was odd if we didn't

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Families
Smugandproud · 23/12/2023 02:06

Dd had a baby last year. My sil got a few gifts and cards, some biscuits and baby things.

DreamingInPhosphorescence · 23/12/2023 02:09

I got a card from work, dh got a card and £200 cash from everyone in his department.

sashh · 23/12/2023 05:07

Are you in the same workplace? If you are then it's one baby one card / present.

I would organise a card for a father but not a present. It depends on the workplace though.

Letsgotitans · 23/12/2023 05:25

No my husband didn't get anything, I didn't think anything of it as if anyone wants to gift something it's an added bonus, not expected. He works for a huge multi million pound company and has been there for years.

PackageCount167 · 23/12/2023 05:57

Big bouquet of flowers for each baby (3)...

CICTGIGF · 23/12/2023 06:01

First baby DH came home with a £50 gift card and card signed by his colleagues, by the second baby he had changed jobs and came home with a card and a big bunch of flowers from them.

Rickenbackergoodgrief · 23/12/2023 06:02

No, he did get dragged off to wet the babies heads though.
I've never heard of a father getting cards and gifts before.

shivawn · 23/12/2023 06:10

Yeah but a gift from the company not a collection from the staff. He works for a multinational company and this stuff is all arranged by someone in the head office in California.

With our first child we got a big hamper of stuff including a big teddy, a dressing gown with his name embroidered on it, clothes etc. Our second child is 3 weeks old now and nothing yet, my husband thinks they might not send anything because him being born has coincided with his directors assistant leaving and not yet replaced so there will be no one to order a gift and send it out. I don't really care either way to be honest.

ofestivetree · 23/12/2023 06:11

No. Really why does it matter so much to you though? It's a work place. Once you leave a workplace they don't care anymore.

anyolddinosaur · 23/12/2023 06:15

No. But I was involved in buying a gift for a male colleague's baby after it was born. Different workplaces, different behaviour.

2Rebecca · 23/12/2023 06:16

Mainly women on mat leave get a card. Our work doesn't do many gifts. Particular people you work with may choose to get a gift. Men on paternity leave rarely get gifts. I think having a baby and being off work for a while is felt to be its own reward.

PurBal · 23/12/2023 06:18

Yes. My work do a new baby hamper regardless of whether you’re male or female. DH got something from his employer and one of his clients.

autienotnaughty · 23/12/2023 07:21

When I went on mat leave my work did a buffet and I got a Moses basket and a few gifts /treats. After baby was born dh work sent flowers and a card which I thought was very sweet.

SnapdragonToadflax · 23/12/2023 07:24

I don't remember my DP getting anything. Maybe a card I guess? Definitely no gift.

IcouldbutIdontwantto · 23/12/2023 08:20

Yes, DH was sent some flowers and a teddy for the baby when DD was born. I've input into collections for gifts for male colleagues who's partners have had babies too, but as they're off for less time, it's less of a leaving/off for a year on mat leave thing and more of a 'congratulations on the baby' thing iyswim.

IcouldbutIdontwantto · 23/12/2023 08:21

IcouldbutIdontwantto · 23/12/2023 08:20

Yes, DH was sent some flowers and a teddy for the baby when DD was born. I've input into collections for gifts for male colleagues who's partners have had babies too, but as they're off for less time, it's less of a leaving/off for a year on mat leave thing and more of a 'congratulations on the baby' thing iyswim.

I should add that the gifts have always been for the baby, and maybe a box of chocolates or something for mum and dad to share!

Parky04 · 23/12/2023 08:41

I didn't receive a card/gift when I went on paternity leave. Wasn't a done thing 20 years ago.

GoodOldEmmaNess · 23/12/2023 08:49

The maternity card/ whip-around is a farewell to a colleague who will be absent for months and months. It is also an acknowledgement that the woman has been through an immense physical process.
Six weeks of paternity leave just isn't the same. If there is an office convention of acknowleding paternity leave with a card, then he is right to feel a bit miffed at not getting one, but if not then it feels a bit needy.

PinkPrawns2 · 23/12/2023 08:52

I work in maternity services and got nothing from anyone 😞

DH got a lovely card and £50 voucher

Still sad years later Sad

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