I have solved the small orange problem

[noblegiraffe]

I just saw a Waitrose billboard that said "You know it's Christmas when you peel your first clementine" which made me think "I know it's Christmas when I consider Pigs in Blankets to be a viable crisp flavour" but it got me mulling over the issue of small oranges, and I think I have finally solved it.

The correct order for small oranges is:

1. Mandarin - the <chef's kiss> of small oranges.

2. Satsuma - a solid entry in the small orange category, easy to peel. Sometimes you get the odd duff tasteless one but usually delicious.

3. Tangerines - could be ranked higher but rarely on the shelves so I kind of forget they exist.

and WAY down the bottom, basically in the bin

4. Clementines - the absolute worst. What is up with that horrible flavour? You'd get a better orange experience from drinking some juice straight after brushing your teeth. They try to disguise them by rebranding them 'easy peelers'. Look at the small print and it's a covert clementine.

I think this is one thing we can all agree on this Christmas.

Sadly they all seem to be mushed together under the banner "easy peelers" these days so you never know what you're going to get.

I bought satsumas in Marks and Spencer’s yesterday. They had a fridge unit full of different small oranges all labelled with what type, including tangerines

Are clementines really the worst? I'm planning to make Nigella's clementine cake for Christmas, should I use a different kind?

I find all small oranges disappointing these days. Dry, insipid, surprise pips and too much white stringy crap that Must Be Removed before I eat them.

Yeah, I agree, they’re all bunged in the ‘easy peelers’ bags. Never know one bag to the next if they’re going to be juicy and sweet little balls of deliciousness or nasty bitter, sour, cat’s bum mouth inducing nastiness.
Currently enjoying an M and S bag of the former, though next week could easily get the latter. Why? WHY????

A fridge??
This opens up a whole new MN question - do you keep your small oranges in the fridge?

I normally go to Sainsbury's and they proudly label their mandarins and satsumas, but when you look at easy peelers, if you check the label they say 'clementine' in tiny letters.

What about Nadorcotts?

Apparently they are a mid to late-maturing Clementine-type of mandarin

Yes to the fridge - love them icy cold! I see, shall go to Sainsbury’s in future then.

@noblegiraffe yes I was a bit puzzled by the fridge too as mine are just in a bowl on the table when I get them home. I thought it was worth mentioning as I only saw them by chance as I was passing, in case others were seeking them in the fruit and veg section 🍊

I quite like clementines to be honest but I had a proper navel orange yesterday for the first time in years and it was bloody lovely.

I'm not sure I've bought a proper orange in years, they just seem too much like Hard Work.

Sounds good. Our supermarket just sells one type labelled easy peeler and what's in the bag really varies- sometimes very tight-skinned clems, sometimes baggier so you never know whether it's a good satsuma or a bad clementine.

I have never heard of them, but I am automatically suspicious of them. Another attempt to get people to buy clementines by tricking them into expecting something nice?

Yes! I love proper satsumas but they're very hard to find, and Sainsbury's is always sold out of tangerines.

When you look at easy peelers they're always clemenules, I don't know why they don't just call them what they are as they're not actually that easy to peel (especially compared to satsumas!)

I second M&S for getting a good selection of orange options (big and small) and actually labelling them.

I am very partial to a tangerine myself.

I use to like a good blood orange but I don't think I've seen them in the store for yonks.

I don't put oranges in the fridge because I like the taste of them.

I haven't had a tangerine in years!

The blood oranges come into season and should start appearing in January. I get them every year from Sainsbury's (and sometimes Waitrose)

Thanks, I'll keep my eyes peeled!

Satsumas are the best. Agree Clementines are the work of the devil. My local Sainsbury's never has satsumas so I'm going to have to prioritise getting to M&S for them now.

Just to add, me and my Mum have reliably been getting lovely satsumas from Sainsbury's every week for over a month.

What pisses me off at this time of year, is my brain jumping about between various pronunciations of Clementine. Jamie Oliver is always on about shoving a Clemen-TEEN up a Turkey's jacksie. I always think surely it's Clemen-TYNE / Clemen-TINE (And then the song comes into my head)

You'd normally trust Nigella wouldn't you? I'm wondering if she's in the pay of Big Clementine.

There are two separate videos when you Google, that both state different apparent correct English pronunciation. Alexa says she says Clemen-TYNE, but is always working on how she says things.

Anyway, I'll shut up now.

<snorts> If she is, then so is Jamie, as it's never a Tangerine or Mandarin that he uses.

Jamie Oliver is always on about shoving a Clemen-TEEN up a Turkey's jacksie.

I would suggest putting them in the bin, but up a turkey's arse is probably also fitting.

I pronounce it Clementeen, when not pronouncing it the work of the devil.