What the chuff do you do with your kids in the afternoons?

[Everyonescoughing]

Have a 3 year old and a 6 month old baby.

It is raining and it’s that cold, icy rain. I can’t honestly say being out in it would be fun for anyone but I would brave it if I just had the 3 year old. However, the baby complicates matters. So that’s out.

All the groups are on in the morning. How to fill the 12-5 time slot?

Our area has afternoon toddler classes, we're in London so just more choice generally. Plus lots of other indoor options like children's centres, soft play, museums, galleries, libraries, NT type properties, swimming, . If it's dry we'll do farms or parks. My dc really need to be out and about as it keeps them active and gives them a change of scenery.

I remember afternoons being a real slog, as you say. Do LOADS of research and you will find at least one playgroup/stay and play that’s on in the afternoon.

And as PP said, nap time for the younger one is a bit of a reset in the middle of the day, so use that to sit down while the three year old has some quiet time, and then gear up for the second shift

I also had membership of local zoo and aquarium but mostly used that in school holidays (in school nursery)

This thread is amazing. Op I also struggle with the afternoons hugely.

I'm heavily pg (got less than 2w to go) and dh went for his last day out at the football on Sunday, leaving me to entertain 3yo dd. (I did shoo him out saying have fun but immediately regretted it and he left before the match was over to get to the tube easily).

Omg I thought I'd never get through the hours.

Loving these tips. I'm definitely going to try the Useless Shopping Trip and the daytime bath ideas! Genius

Arts and crafts often get suggested on threads like this - I know it's very beneficial for kids in terms of motor skills and creativity etc but am I the only mum who absolutely hates doing it? It entertains dd for all of ten minutes and she needs constant assistance/direction/praise. Setting up and clearing away takes way longer than the activity itself.

I remember those long afternoons, although it seems like a lifetime ago but was only about 4 years.
Afternoon baths were a favourite in our house ( eldest at 10 will still stay in the bath for hours) or building a den.
We had a yearly pass for local farm with a small soft play that was great on rainy days as not many people went to the farm so it was quiet.
Agree about the nursing home idea, our local one has a singing group each week for toddlers and the residents.

For example, rainy day today! Have to stay home waiting for a package and then I fancy a coffee. So we’ll take the car and drive to a coffee shop maybe 15min away, hang around for an hour or so then drive back. Kill time whatever way you can right 😂

I've said it before and I'll say it again but I think people's memories get a little hazy remembering the exact age their children were when they could do certain crafts without too much bother. The difference between 2 and 3 and 4 is really big here.

My contribution for an activity idea is: getting dc to chop vegetables for batch cooking.

We got these child-safe plastic knives off amazon which are sharp enough to chop most veg but can't slice through skin (genius). She will chop veg with me for literally half an hour - carrots, mushrooms, peppers, etc. I slice, she dices, like a factory conveyor belt. As long as it's a baton shape when I pass it to her, she can cut it into cubes really easily. Sometimes we put netflix on in the background.

Yea to chopping! And it’s actually useful!!

also loved washing up - water & bubbles everywhere - only the non breakables of course!

I have kids the exact same ages and I do find the afternoons hard. I just try and spin everything out as long as possible. My 3 year old is at nursery in the mornings so I pick her up at lunch time. So she has “rest time” for a bit where she lies on the couch watching tv with a blanket for a while I make a fuss over her having a rest and get her all cosy to entice her to stay there for a bit. Then snack time is set up as a tea party with her dolls etc and she has to make her dolls a snack at her play kitchen, basically turn an activity that would normally take 2 minutes into 45 minutes lol. Then when the baby naps the toddler helps me make dinner that takes ages and kills time. Then a walk around the shops etc if we get bored.

I too find soft plays pretty difficult but do you have any they little role play cafes near you? We have one that’s great, it’s not too boisterous so I can take the baby in to play as well.

@WhatNoRaisins I agree with you there. And to be fair there’s a huge difference between just turned two and nearly three as well.

@Mummymummy89 i really found dc1 so hard when heavily pregnant. I just didn’t have it in me to do much. We got through it but it is actually easier with the baby in tow if that helps, although it does complicate matters too of course.

Oh OP, I feel you! I had similar aged DC last year.

There have been lots of good suggestions so far, like the 'Useless Shopping trip' (we did so many of those!), messy play etc.

For me, baby would be down for a nap from approx. 12-2pm, which left me with 3 hours until dinnertime after her waking up. The two hours of nap time were spent with DS aged 3.5, and it was a lot of him playing in his room with his toys/colouring etc. while I got laundry and other tasks done. He liked to listen to a podcast like Thomas the Tank Engine while he played, which was a nice change from the screen. He would sometimes help prep dinner, though I use the slow cooker and rice cooker almost everyday, and generally do my meal prep in the evenings.

Once DD was awake, it was snack time and then we HAD to go outside. If we didn't, we'd go stir crazy. Even in the rain etc. My DD also hated the rain cover, so many afternoons were awful. I purchased a puddle suit, some boots (once she was walking) and just let her get wet and dirty. Same for DS. I had several coats and suits that I rotated as they were always soaking wet. I also wore DD in the baby carrier (front facing) if she was really fussy, and we all just got soaked.

Once home, it was all about warming up with a warm drink, and then we'd do some activities together, like dancing to YouTube videos, or I'd bring some toys up from the basement. There is a great second-hand toy shop near me, and I'd get a huge box of toys for a tenner, and donate them again once we were sick of them. In our basement I have 7-8 boxes of toys ready to bring out on days with terrible weather.

This was all before we had a garden. Now that I have a garden, we are out there a lot in the afternoons. My DS likes to draw with chalk on the pavers, or play with his toys in a bucket of water, and DD just kind of toddles about.

But one thing's for sure: I never got anything 'done' in the afternoons. So I had to make sure all the chores/dinner etc. was sorted before DD woke up from nap. I learnt that the hard way!

I agree - arts and crafts didn't become enjoyable until my DS was around 4 years old. Before then, it was just a stressful mess. Now, it's one of my favourite things to do with him.

I remember paying a lot of money for an art class at a cafe for him when he was 3. The idea was that the parents could have a coffee and chat while the kids did art. The group of 3-year-olds at the table (my DS included!) were unable to sit and follow the class. They ended up getting out of their chairs and running around... it was horrible for all the parents! I don't know what the art teacher was thinking! Or myself for that matter, as a teacher! It's like we all forgot that they were 3! Needless to say, none of us finished our coffees...

I had a 2 year old in lockdown and the amount of well intentioned but terrible advice on "things to do with them" people would message me honestly made me want to stop communicating with people.

If it wasn't raining we would either go a short walk or play in the garden for a short while. I never really did anything planned in the afternoons. I would let them play in the livingroom with toys, drawing etc. Sometimes make them a tent with a blanket over a couple of chairs. They could entertain themselves for ages with teddies and dolls etc getting dragged in and out.
I used the time to get on with housework and prep dinner. I would have the 3 year old helping me by picking things up. Giving them the basket of laundry to put in the washing machine. Helping with any cooking or prep I was doing, basically just having them pottering about with me chatting and doing stuff. The baby would nap and once he woke up I would let the older one help get by asking them to get me the nappies, wipes etc. The older one loved to help entertain the baby and making them laugh playing peek a boo and "reading" them stories
They really don't need something planned every day, just being part of day to day stuff going on in the house as Ive said above is stimulating and they are constantly learning as they go.
Kids need downtime as well. Ther rush to fill every morning and afternoon with a planned activity can be counter productive. They need to also learn to entertain themselves. Nothing wrong with some telly also, obviously 6 hours is way to much in one go but pop an episode of something on for 30 mins for a bit of chill time a couple of times a day will do no harm.

I read posts like that one and wonder if I have exceptionally needy kids. Baby wakes up as soon as put down so can’t do anything productive when napping (that tends to be when I do rely on the TV) and I’ve never cracked doing chores with a toddler. Well meaning but destructive is how I’d summarise her at this stage!

Mine were like yours. Chopping vegetables was a winner but other chores were not.

I’m ordering a child friendly knife!

Hate it. That's what paid childcare is for - the wonderful people who do that job get paid for it! I also do not cook/bake/do housework with tiny children. Mine is now nearly 5 and has been of more use than hindrance for less than a year. Hideous before that!

Hope it works for you like it does for us!

I originally bought them because I read somewhere that it might encourage dd to eat more veg. [Hollow laugh] she loves chopping them but still won't touch any veg except sweetcorn and the watery bit inside a cucumber.

But it kills time!

The 3 yo can play and the baby sleeps?

I'd occupy myself and leave the 3yo to play, learning to play independently is so important.

I used to take them to a massive shopping centre or indoor food market near where we used to live. they could trundle around in the warm and look at all the shiny lights and look in the toy shops and 'help' with any supermarket shopping.

Or soft play, sometimes.

Sometimes we'd cuddle up under a duvet on the sofa and watch a film or I'd read to them or we'd get the Duplo out and build a castle or get the train track out and build that.

pet shops often have animals to look at

Just thought I'd come back on with another idea to contribute after thinking about it (also I'm keen to keep this thread alive because it is what I love/need on mumsnet)...

Dh likes to put together flat pack furniture with 3yo dd. I mean, obviously only if such a task needs doing! She's surprisingly not unhelpful - she can identify which screw/tool is needed from the ikea diagrams and then pass it over. She can also hold a thing steady while dh hammers or screws it on. FIL also got dd to hold the torch when he was doing some mice-proofing in our garage for us, also passing up screws/rivets when he was up the ladder. I really appreciate this because I was brought up thinking any handyman type work was something you paid people to do and wasn't for us delicate flowers (I had a single mum with no DIY skills). She's even got a toy hard hat she can wear. This can consume an entire weekend's worth of afternoons (chef's kiss)