Schools demand national campaign against parents who are abusive to school staff

[noblegiraffe]

A survey suggests that 30% of classroom teachers and 75% of headteachers have received verbal abuse from parents this year, a marked increase on before the pandemic.

The North East Schools network would like to see a national NHS-style campaign to highlight the issue and to say that abuse against school staff is never appropriate. Given that there are many public places that have signs up saying 'abuse against staff will not be tolerated' it always surprises me that this is not already a thing in schools.

Interestingly the article notes "While most interactions with parents were positive, there were small groups of parents “willing to be abusive towards school staff” – including complaints straight to external government agencies.
These bodies, such as Ofsted, the Department for Education and the Education and Skills Funding Agency “should only get involved once the school has completed their complaints procedure”."

Perhaps all those on here who rush to write 'complain to Ofsted' about some school incident should take note that they are part of the problem.

https://schoolsweek.co.uk/schools-demand-national-campaign-against-abusive-parents/

Are you saying Ofsted do have teeth in these situations then? Or that a Headteacher wouldn’t try and manage out an expensive teacher if a complaint was made against that teacher through the proper channels? If it’s the latter then you seem to be saying that no parent can ever say they are going to complain about something, even through the proper channels in case they alarm the teacher. Which is….ludicrous. And still not abusive.

”I’m not happy about how that teacher spoke to my child, I will be taking this further” = abusive? Come on.

Ok I’m certain this won’t be popular but when I was at school there was very little cause to complain about teachers. You went in, they taught, you went home. Unless something absolutely wild happened like a teacher stripping in front of his class, there was simply nothing to complain about. There were always personality clashes between teachers and students but that was a fact of life and you just got on with it. It’s now we have much higher expectations of teachers/schools and expect them to have an involved quasi-parent role that there is cause for ‘complaints’. Maybe we just need to go back to teachers teaching and not being expected to be everything to everyone and involved in every aspect of the kids lives. There needs to be clear lines of demarcation and parents need to back the school when their child is disciplined.

@Saucery Unfortunately it is more often the latter than the former. Parents seem to think that Ofsted will sweep in and clear out anyone they disagree with.

They don’t often think about how that would affect the overall running of the school.

I say that some people don’t see teachers as human from direct experience. I have been sworn at, accused of bullying, called a liar, had parents and kids take pictures of me when I am out and about and put them on social media. Colleagues have been followed home, been hunted down and brigaded on social media.

Yes, decisions to off-roll or unlawfully exclude are typically made by the Head and the complaint would describe the Head's behaviour/decision making.

Yes, you've been clear who you think the problem is but how are you creating a media anti-abuse campaign saying that complaining to ofsted is abusive behaviour without putting people off from using ofsted?

If it’s the latter then you seem to be saying that no parent can ever say they are going to complain about something, even through the proper channels in case they alarm the teacher. Which is….ludicrous.

No, that's not what I'm saying.

I'm saying that your insistence that teachers shouldn't worry about spurious complaints isn't actually that helpful.

I think the ofsted issue is just a measurable thing to provide some contextual data around complaints to add to the headteachers anecdotes. Some will be part of an abusive pattern of behaviour some will be people thinking incorrectly its just what you do. But either way its a big increase and it points to a breakdown in parent school relations and a shift from before.

It would be interesting to know why there has been a shift.

Its never ok to be abusive.

I'm not creating any media anti-abuse campaign. You can read about the one in the article I posted in the OP, which includes mention of spurious complaints to external agencies.

I know. I work in education and have witnessed real abuse more times than I would ever have wanted, particularly at my previous school.

Saying the word ‘Ofsted’ is not abuse. They won’t address complaints that haven’t been through the proper channels, so there isn’t a problem there and all school staff need to be aware of that so they don’t worry about it.

Saying the word ‘Ofsted’ is not abuse.

Good thing no one has claimed that.

How does one determine if a complaint is spurious or not without investigating it? Sounds like some people don't want parents to have an avenue to complain at all and for their power to be absolute. That's dystopian.

Except no one has said that.

These are two completely different issues.

Not following the complaints process isn't abuse. It may be OTT, silly, obtuse. But it isn't abusive.

Lots of people feel uncomfortable reporting concerns to the same staff who are the ones you're concerned about. Most people don't like conflict. It's easier to report to Ofsted etc. I'm not saying that's correct, but it's hardly abusive.

Actual abuse against school staff is awful and never called for. It sets an awful example to your child and high rates risk a very real issue with retaining and attracting school staff in the future. Shame on those who do abuse public sector workers.

I'm looking forward to giving our teachers and headteacher some thank you biscuits this Christmas, they bloody deserve it.

In this case what is being said is that HTs will use any complaint to get rid of teachers that they don't like or just want out of the school.

No one is saying that complaints shouldn't be investigated.

I'm saying that your insistence that teachers shouldn't worry about spurious complaints isn't actually that helpful.

Why not? Nothing will come of them. Why waste time worrying about something that will have no impact on me whatsoever?
If someone says to me “I’m not happy about this, I’m going to escalate it to Ofsted” I will tell them the correct way to raise a complaint. If they have no cause for complaint I won’t be giving it another thought.
If someone squares up to me and shouts that I’m “fucking useless and Ofsted are going to hear about this!” I’ll be putting considerable distance between me and them, probably not bothering to go into the formal complaint procedure there and then and informing my SLT immediately. That is abusive.

Why not? Nothing will come of them. Why waste time worrying about something that will have no impact on me whatsoever?

Because it's human nature to worry about this sort of thing. You don't, and that's great for you, but I know enough teachers who have lost sleep about this sort of thing to know that your position is not the default.

In this case what is being said is that HTs will use any complaint to get rid of teachers that they don't like or just want out of the school.

Yes, I know, which has nothing at all to do with the report about abuse in the OP. I’m not sure why @noblegiraffe threw it in tbh, but I thought I’d address it in case it turned out to have some relevance. It seems it does not 🤷‍♀️

Last week a parent threatened us with ofsted because we wouldn't take her son on the rewards trip because his behaviour was so appalling.

Apparently his dad will "fuck up that bitch" (the head of year) if she's doesn't let him go.

Charm personified.

And I know enough teachers who wouldn’t worry about it to know your position isn’t the default, so there you go, Clash Of The Anecdata.

Perhaps you know a lot of timid, inexperienced teachers, or a lot of teachers who skate the line of professional behaviour, or a lot of teachers with shitty SLTs who want to replace the entire staff with NQTs and Cover Supervisors….

Still doesn’t alter the fact that a stated intention to contact Ofsted, as long as not accompanied by abusive or threatening behaviour or language, is not in itself abusive.

Schools hold the power over the parents and child. Example - If you're unhappy about something and you get fobbed off and nothing gets done, then you go to the chair of govs and still nothing gets done and your child is being emotionally and physically hurt by other dc in the school then yes I can imagine tensions get high when a parent feels powerless. And it's easy to say well remove your child but if they're sitting their SATs or in yr 10/11 it's not that easy. Schools change the rules over night, the very strict behaviour policies from academys are not trauma informed ways of managing behaviour and I can totally see different scenarios that create a lot of tension, stress and anger in parents. It's basically suck it up or your kid won't get to their exams and then fail at life.

Boundaries aren't there in an effective way. Behaviour isn't managed appropriately, bullying and racism is rife and school children have to put up with much worse conditions than the workforce.

Honestly I'm so glad my dc have left school. The last year of school was a nightmare for my son and yes I did end up shouting at a headteacher because of his computer says no attitude. I'm a grown up, in a very demanding job where emotional regulation is key to effective working and yet I lost my shit because of how shit things were for my son and the lack of support the new head had for him. Probably how powerless I felt too. If me, a fully rounded and regulated and educated adult who works with the most traumatised YP in my day role couldn't manage my emotions then I'm not sure how others who don't have that, who are living in choas and survival mode, are managing. Luckily for my son the chair of the governors listened to me and took my suggestions seriously. I doubt he would have listened if it wasn't for my work credentials, my work contacts in LA education and obvious knowledge of the Children Act and how I pointed out schools duty of care which they were failing.

Part of the problem is lack of consequences imo. If you were abusive and threatening in a supermarket you’d be banned from going in there again. They won’t ban you from a school or expel your child over it. If they did expel children over parental behaviour the local authority still has a responsibility to place the child so it pushes the nasty parent onto another school. I’m not really sure what the answer is but consequences need to be dished out. Maybe banning abusive parents from school grounds but how do their kids get dropped off, would they just use it as an excuse not to take kids to school anymore? It opens a can of worms and the children themselves are the ones to suffer the consequences of their parents actions in the end.

I’m not sure why @noblegiraffe threw it in tbh

Because it is included quite prominently in the article which I linked to and has been discussed by Amanda Spielman as part of a fracture between schools and parents which has seen what she describes as 'increasing friction' between the two.

And given that I was posting the article on MN, to make it relevant to the place I am posting it, I thought I would mention the tendency on MN of some posters to throw in 'complain to Ofsted' as advice about school incidents rather than recommend the school complaints procedure, or trying to work with the school in any way.

I've also been aware of an incident where reports were (incorrectly) made to Ofsted and the school was shamed in the press, and it was horrible and stressful for those involved, not a minor thing easily brushed off at all.

I didn't say it was in itself abusive. I said it can be (and is) used in a threatening or intimidating way.

And yet the spurious reports are being used to force teachers out.
It is part of the problem.

How much injury do you want for him?

Beaten to a pulp in front of Year 7s?

Stabbed in the playground in front of everybody?

Smack in the face after the assailant has charged directly through the 67 year old woman who runs reception and knocked her to the floor?

Who's giving him first aid and CPR - a 22 year old ECT, a Year 11 prefect?

How about the effects upon the other staff and students - how about the child of the attacking parent, should they have the disruption in life from their parent being arrested for murdering their teacher? How about carrying the guilt for being responsible for the teacher's death or serious injury for a lifetime?

How about the need for another thousand students to feel safe in school - something they clearly aren't if a parent can come in and assault or kill a teacher? Today, a disliked Head of Year, tomorrow it could be one of them on the floor in a pool of blood.

I've been trapped in my office, I've seen the terror in the kids when a parent/sibling/friend/gangleader has gained entry into a school and are searching for somebody. I've seen the campaigns of terror that have been waged upon staff.

A flippant no sympathy comment belies the very real trauma and risk that something like that presents to a school.