Friend keeps slagging off my artwork

[Yor]

I have an Instagram account dedicated to my artwork as a hobby which consists of my drawings. Whenever I meet up with her she always says things like “you’re hardly any good to post to insta, are you?” or “looks like a 3 year old drew it”, then just laughs. I just do a fake laugh and move on. I think she thinks is just banter but I think she means it secretly and she never likes the posts either. It really makes me feel shitty when she puts my artwork down all the time.

It would be a good idea to block her from your Insta page, actually.

Her not seeing your art may be enough for it to stop and if she asks why she can't see it you can say she'd made it very clear she didn't like it so you thought it was for the best.

Just because you knew her at primary school doesn't make her a friend.

She can't even be diplomatic and polite about your artwork. She'd be an ex friend if it were me as she has no manners or grace.

It is hurtful. I did a clay model of a woman, I was so happy with it. My mother said "it's got no clothes on". That's all she saw. Some people have no access to the part of them that can appreciate or create art.

OP I ridded myself of a friend like this and I was frightened at first to lose them and all I believed we had... I now am surrounded by friends who all have a common attitude of supporting each other and are each others biggest cheerleaders

Was well worth ditching the previous friendship for

We're still honest but offer constructive criticism in a respectful way and have plenty of banter, it just doesn't have that derogatory undertone to it

You should find better friends, it's much more enjoyable

You've known a mean, jealous cow forever.

You've been putting up with her nasty comments forever.

She's got away with it forever.

Guess what?

You can tell her - stop making mean comments about what I love to create, or 'forever' becomes 'never again'.

Some people can only make themselves feel better about themselves by making others feel worse.

They are just sad people.

Why can't you cut her out your life?

If she punched you in the face every time she saw you, would you still meet up with her?

What's the difference? She may not be physically punching you but she's punching to hurt! She's a real nasty piece of work!

I can name a few friends whose artwork I don't like and they also happen to be acclaimed in the international art world. I doubt your "friend" knows more than me about art. But whatever, I wouldn't pretend to like someone's work, I just keep my opinion to myself.

Block her from following your IG and if she asks why then tell her the truth.
Doesn't sound like much of a friend if all you have in common these days is memories of the past.

Firstly - that is no friend. A friend should lift you up, not put you down.

Secondly - the thing about art is that it is extremely subjective. I love art, and paint a bit myself - but there are pieces I would happily hang on my wall and equally, there are others that are just not my taste... that does not, however, mean I cannot acknowledge/respect the work that went into a piece. The kinds of remarks you are getting are simply nasty and uncalled for.

You can absolutely cut her off. I wouldn't be dealing with that

Just explain to her how hurtful you find it

You say to her, "Does your rubbishing me make you feel better about yourself? My artwork which I enjoy doing immensely is open to interpretation but your put downs sound bitter and churlish and I can't help but wonder why you want to knock me down rather than build me up?"

Then I'd dump her.

Imagine how Tracy Emin feels.

Art is really subjective. As long as it makes you feel good doing it and showing it then to hell with what everyone else thinks.

I'd have said something when she did but I know it's not always easy. She obviously thinks she can get away with saying stuff and thinking it's a 'joke' whether she means it or not. I wouldn't call her a friend though.

Is she trying to spare you from embarrassing yourself though? Because what if she is right? And people are slagging you off behind your back. I have a few friend with instagram for this, no one says anything to their face, but it’s really bad and they are being made fun of by mutual acquaintances and I do wonder if I should tell them or just keep my mouth shut.

of course you can cut her off

She's not a friend OP. I binned a jealous "friend" who would make hurtful comments and I grieved the friendship for a while because there were so many good memories. But they weren't enough to keep it going anymore and it sounds like it's time for you to call it a day with this person.

It doesn't matter whether the artwork is potato prints or @Yor is the next Van Gogh, if she wants to post it to instagram it's up to her!

As for your acquaintances, if you don't defend the person they slag off, you're as bad as them. Some people just can't seem to leave the playground and bullying behind them but bring it into adult life.

This is exactly what she relies on - the idea that she can be as much of a bitch as she likes and brush it off with an airy “Oh, Yor and I have been friends forever - we can say anything to each other”. She needs to be told she can’t.

If she does it again, tell her “Look, I know I’m not exactly Picasso and I’m not claiming to be. But I enjoy it, I want to carry on doing it and I don’t want you pissing on my chips, frankly”. If she gets that she’s gone too far, maybe the friendship can be saved. If she rolls her eyes and says “For God’s sake, it was only a joke” or similar, you know she’s not worth bothering with anymore. You can survive without the occasional nostalgic laugh about the time Sally Hudson’s knickers fell down in Year 6.

The thing is if it’s only a hobby, does it really matter? If the OP has decided she’s a great artist and should quit her job to do it full time, then yes, maybe her friends should be worried. But there’s no suggestion she’s done anything of the sort. Even if that was her plan, there has to be a more subtle way of advising caution than to say her artwork looks like a toddler did it.

I’d imagine she’s jealous. If not of your talent, maybe of you having the courage just to do what you like.

I don’t say a word. I’m not going to sit and say it’s great work when it’s not, and the posts are braggy and attention seeking rather than just, “here is a thing I did” so not defending it, but I also don’t slag it off.

Your friend should be supporting you or at least keeping quiet about it. I find it really hard to lie and say that I think something is great when I don't so I'd just not mention it.
I've recently started drawing again for the first time since I was a teen and I haven't posted my work anywhere. I think you need to have a thick skin to do that and you have to accept that once you put it out there you can't control the comments you will get, although I'm far from terrible I'm not ready yet to have my work pulled apart. I do admire the people have the balls to post their art, even when it's not very good, though.