I want to hugely reduce my phone use - anyone want to join me?

[WatershipClown]

I’ve just had two weeks off work and I am filled with regret that the main thing I have done, for two weeks, is go on my phone and scroll.
I don’t feel well rested, I haven’t read any books or done anything creative, I haven’t socialised, nothing. I’m also very overweight, the house is a mess and I feel like I have no time, but the truth is I just waste it on my phone.

My arbitrary rules are:
I have decided to restrict phone use to 5 mins in the morning, 5 mins at lunchtime and 5 mins after dinner.
No looking at even bank app unless absolutely necessary.
No online shopping unless essential.
Can use maps/national rail app as necessary if driving out of area.
Can listen to podcasts but no more than 2 mins to choose one.

I would like to do more cooking, painting, reading and exercise with the vast amount of time this will free up (delusional? Me? 🤣)
Is anyone else thinking they also need to change something in a similar way?

I feel the same

I have my own business and a lot of it involves social media plus a lot of fb and insta inquiries so it's really difficult to stay off my phone

I need to do this so badly. I work remotely and have intensely busy times and really quiet times. I’m also using it to relieve anxiety and a kind of boredom/ overall lack of fulfilment at the moment I think.

I’m sat at a train station currently, I was looking forward to my long journey thinking oh well at least I’ll get time to read, but all I’ve done so far is scroll. I miss the days of getting through a at least one book a week - always managed 50 books a year easily, far more some years. I managed about 30 so far this year due to a concerted effort to have less phone time at the start of the year, but have stalled and not picked up my latest book in well over a month now.

More importantly, it’s not doing my relationship nor my parenting any favours.

I’m getting ready for my 20mins, three times a day ration of phone time from tomorrow.
Have been more conscious of phone use for the past few days. I have noticed that I used it on a train journey but it was mostly because I felt awkward about sitting amongst three couple who were friends and having a conversation (nowhere else to sit). Using my phone was a good way to feel less self conscious. Then I forced myself to put it away and felt compelled to shut my eyes And pretend to sleep! 😂
Anyway the point is that there is something that triggers phone use each time, and by leaning into what that feeling is, I am hoping I will be less mindless when I pick up my phone without an express purpose.

I'd like to join in now, but first of all I want to reduce my use in the evening, I've downloaded Erika and set it to shut most things down at 10 pm until 8 am. I hope to get used to that and then cut down on my use during the day as well.

I'm thinking that when I lose time to mindless scrolling I need to think of it as like an alcoholic deliberately staying in the pub when their family is waiting for them at home. Alcoholics don't just go for one pint after work - they don't come home for hours. They also do things like drink first thing in the morning before work.

I regularly lose a lot of time to mindless surfing on my phone when I wake up, instead of sleeping for long enough, or getting up. I wouldn't go to a pub before breakfast, yet I take myself out of family life to surf for that amount of time every morning instead - is that actually much better?

I also wouldn't go to a pub for hours every day to watch strangers do short funny sketches or talk about their parking arguments (with diagrams). Nor would I sit in a pub for hours to follow breaking news stories or political debates. I wouldn't dream of leaving my house to do those things for hours every day, but I spend the same amount of time doing them online. It's crazy.

So, my new question for myself when I'm doing something online will be "am I in the pub?" Am I doing something purposefully to fulfil an aim, or have I just clicked on something to mindlessly satisfy my alcoholic-style dopamine cravings, with no purpose or plan? By clicking on this site that I know I'll likely get stuck on for ages, am I actually doing a type of sneaking off to the pub, like an alcoholic?

This is a really good analogy actually. So true.

This thread is a couple of months old now but I wonder how you are all doing? I would like to reduce my screen time. A lot of this thread has resonated - using it for distraction (from both boredom or from uncomfortable emotions. and also for some kind of connection .. And getting pulled into rubbish when initially picking it up for a purposeful reason. I took sometimes feel like I'm looking for something but don't know what.

So anyway, I signed up to weekly emails from the guardian written by the person who wrote how to break up with your phone.

Today I spent 5hr 16 mins and unlocked my phone 80 times. I have been at home with 3 year old. Gosh. I want to do better.

@CountryMouseInAFix I recently bought a book called “The Phone Fix” by Dr Faye Begeti. She’s a neurology dr and neuroscientist. (The Brain Doctor on Instagram).

It’s and fantastic and full of information and practical steps towards using your tech in a healthier way. It’s very non judgmental and kind which has helped me because going cold turkey and harsh approach hasn’t worked for me in the past. I’d recommend it! Maybe head to your local library and request them to order it in?

I did well when I had my crochet project but now I've finished that , phone use is creeping up again.
Need to start something new.

The intention is there but the actual doing it not so much. I read Digital Minimalism last week which was okay but the author had never really been addicted to his phone and didn’t use social media. I’m going to investigate the suggestions above as it’s so frustrating to realise I’ve wasted hours with nothing to show.

I'll join please OP. I'm terribly addicted to my phone, can feel the twitchy fingers and need for dopamine. Apart from anything else it's fucking up my eyes. I wonder if in the future we'll be shocked at how we allowed ourselves and our kids to have devices. Like how people used to be able to smoke anywhere or how drink driving used to be more acceptable.

I will definitely try the Erika app thanks and maybe find a hobby (used to love tapestries and quilling). I also have this time delay safe that's fantastic but I've gotten out of the habit of using https://www.amazon.co.uk/Kitchen-Safe-Locking-Container-Height/dp/B00E92JXHG I don't think about it when it's in there.

Yes! I'll join you!

I’ll join too! One thing that I’ve started doing is when I feel like mindlessly picking up my phone I wait for just 5 minutes. If I still want to pick it up after that I do it guilt free. Quite often I get bored of waiting and get on with doing something else. It’s very effective!

Evenings are my weakness, I find it very hard to stay away then so I try to make my changes in the morning as it’s easier and give myself a pat on the back if I succeed (well done me) 😅

I've done a bit better today. Been able to get outside which helps, and had some work to do. But still longer than I would like. It was mostly intentional, but then later in the day I could feel brain saying I deserve a treat for being so good and fifteen minutes later I realised I was stopped standing in the middle of the hallway watching shit on insta.

I think being conscious of it has helped today. And the pub analogy up thread. Would like to break the habit / compulsion..

What's your new hobby going to be @ThePoshUns ? Annoying how it creeps back even after a break isn't it

Oh meant to also say that I read somewhere that phones are designed like fruit machines and even the colours give our brains a hit of reward, whatever I read said try turning it into black and white so I'm going to try that for a bit and see if it helps

Following!

I started a new crochet project this evening so spent 2 hrs in that. Phone use is half today of yesterday's

Man I feel the same. Damn mumsnet late at night!

Given how tired I've felt today I'm actually pleased with my digital wellbeing report for today... Less than yesterday! And I honestly felt I was on it more today - perhaps I was more conscious of what I was doing?

Will be interesting to see what happens tomorrow as I'll be spending the day reading/writing for a project I'm doing, and my focus recently has been terrible

Hello, well done those of you who've had some wins this week. I couldn't find the Erika app so instead I've just started the 7 day trial of Minimalist Phone. Seems good so far and has a monochrome mode @CountryMouseInAFix

I've otherwise failed spectacularly this week; zero change. But I haven't really been trying. I just need my damn phone for so many things ugh. Though I have watches now which is good. Need to get an alarm clock so I don't have to have it in my bedroom at night. Anyway, good luck to all of us!

@BlurpBlorp so much of life is conducted through our phones now! I'm trying not to mind that stuff tbh. What I mind is the mindless scrolling, shopping for stuff I don't need and following random rabbit holes of 'research'.

Today my screen time is already high, but for example 45 mins of that is from an exercise class I did online and following along a recipe as I cooked...