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Original poster

Would you leave DS11 home alone?

48 replies

Mawface · 23/11/2023 15:34

Hi, need some opinions on this.

DD2 caught a sickness bug from nursery last week so I had to pick her up/miss two days of work. Then I caught the bug and was off mon/Tuesday. I only get one family day which I've already used this year from DD being sent home and work term time so dont get annual leave. I'm going to probably lose 4 days wages as we don't get paid for child's sickness.

DS8 & DH also had the bug over the weekend and now DS11 has it. DH had to use the last of his annual leave 2 weeks ago because of ANOTHER sickness of DD.

Now, with DS11 being off school today DH had to leave work to pick him up and he's been sick a few times so won't be at school tomorrow.

With both of us having nobody to watch him would you leave DS11 home alone tomorrow? He's a very mature 11 y/o and would just be sat in his room watching TV. I leave just before 9 and DH comes home for lunch at 11.30 then I'd be home by 2.30.

I've left in for an hour or so before but just don't know if I feel comfortable leaving him for so long and with not being well. All opinions welcome.

OP posts:
Morechocmorechoc · 23/11/2023 15:35

With the shirt tike frames so long as he isn't too ill it sounds fine. Also so long as he doesn't mind at all.

OhmygodDont · 23/11/2023 15:36

If his sick then I wouldn’t. If it was a teacher training day then yes but a sick child I wouldn’t leave unattended.

Minikievs · 23/11/2023 15:38

It's 2.5 hours til your DH comes home for lunch, I'd 100% leave him

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ColonelRhubarbBikini · 23/11/2023 16:07

If he was still actively being sick then no I wouldn’t but if that had passed and just in the dry toast and feeling a bit under the weather phase then I would absolutely.

PortalooSunset · 23/11/2023 17:53

Actively vomiting/unwell then no. Maybe if he was feeling ok-ish and just off due to 48 hour rule. As long as there's no chance DH won't get back to check on him between the time you leave and get back. If he's still properly unwell (my usually resilient 14yo asked me to stay home recently when unwell) then I think one of you has to stay. Or have a convenient relapse of your own symptoms?

SoddingWeddings · 23/11/2023 17:58

No, he's a sick child.

Original poster
Mawface · 23/11/2023 18:23

PortalooSunset · 23/11/2023 17:53

Actively vomiting/unwell then no. Maybe if he was feeling ok-ish and just off due to 48 hour rule. As long as there's no chance DH won't get back to check on him between the time you leave and get back. If he's still properly unwell (my usually resilient 14yo asked me to stay home recently when unwell) then I think one of you has to stay. Or have a convenient relapse of your own symptoms?

Have decided DH is going to phone in tomorrow, just don't feel comfortable incase he's alone and vomits. He's quite happy to be here himself but I just don't feel good about it.

OP posts:
IndysMamaRex · 24/11/2023 22:54

Why don’t you get annual leave on term time? How many weeks a year do you take cos I take 6 weeks a years & only lost like 2 days annual leave. I’d look into that.
I’d say they'll be fine in that shirt space of time

Harry12345 · 24/11/2023 22:56

If he’s still being sick and not feeling well then definitely not.

idontlikealdi · 24/11/2023 22:59

No I wouldn't.

SandyWaves · 24/11/2023 23:35

I cannot believe a parent would leave an 11 year at home alone. Sickness aside, burglars, fire risk etc. Madness

User3456 · 25/11/2023 01:14

No I wouldn't
Something needs to be done by government about the amount of infections circulating in schools and nurseries though
It's causing massive stress (health, financial, life) to many many families

Ladyj84 · 25/11/2023 01:20

So your 12 year old would know how to deal with door knockers, potential intruders etc????? Wouldn't get me leaving any child at 11 and especially if there sick. Sorry you choose to have children then they should come first

TerrysChocolateOrange · 25/11/2023 01:21

Not a chance.

RedHelenB · 25/11/2023 06:29

Ladyj84 · 25/11/2023 01:20

So your 12 year old would know how to deal with door knockers, potential intruders etc????? Wouldn't get me leaving any child at 11 and especially if there sick. Sorry you choose to have children then they should come first

Mine were left at that age and were fine, they're not babies.

Ascubudr · 25/11/2023 06:38

User3456 · 25/11/2023 01:14

No I wouldn't
Something needs to be done by government about the amount of infections circulating in schools and nurseries though
It's causing massive stress (health, financial, life) to many many families

The government ? Really ? Public health maybe ? I am childrens' doctor just what exactly do you think the government should do ?

GuitarGeorgina · 25/11/2023 07:27

I would if he’s happy with it and not still being sick.

Celebrationsnakes · 25/11/2023 07:31

I wouldn't at that age.

PotteringAlonggotkickedoutandhadtoreregister · 25/11/2023 07:34

I would definitely leave him for the short time frame, especially if he’s stopped being sick.

actually, if he’s stopped being sick I would send him to school… 🤷🏻‍♀️

PortalooSunset · 25/11/2023 07:35

IndysMamaRex · 24/11/2023 22:54

Why don’t you get annual leave on term time? How many weeks a year do you take cos I take 6 weeks a years & only lost like 2 days annual leave. I’d look into that.
I’d say they'll be fine in that shirt space of time

I would assume op works in an education setting or similar with fixed holidays.

Thequeenofwishfulthinking · 25/11/2023 07:35

I think that’s the right decision. I wouldn’t leave an ill older child at home alone unless there was an emergency.

PortalooSunset · 25/11/2023 07:37

Hope you're all fighting fit again now @Mawface Flowers

Iscreamtea · 25/11/2023 07:38

Ascubudr · 25/11/2023 06:38

The government ? Really ? Public health maybe ? I am childrens' doctor just what exactly do you think the government should do ?

Show quote history

Perhaps stop penalising parents for keeping their children off school when they are ill? Perhaps make it so that employers have to allow parents time off work to care for sick children?

Iscreamtea · 25/11/2023 07:41

I think you have made the right decision. I would be fine leaving him if he was well (after all a child that age is surely safer at home alone than they are travelling to and from school alone, which most of them do every day) but not when he's ill.

Kazzybingbong · 25/11/2023 07:43

User3456 · 25/11/2023 01:14

No I wouldn't
Something needs to be done by government about the amount of infections circulating in schools and nurseries though
It's causing massive stress (health, financial, life) to many many families

I agree. They are so obsessed with attendance figures that they don’t even want them off if they’re throwing up. I saw a secondary school that said in its absence policy that the 48 hour rule doesn’t apply once they are in secondary?! What?!

Have we learned nothing from Covid? If you’re sick, stay home. Grown adults shouldn’t be penalised for being off and kids shouldn’t be hammered about attendance. All this does is cause viruses to spread even more and cause more problems like the OP now has.

OP, you have had an awful week, I’m so sorry, I hope you’re all better soon.