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Original poster

How to have handled this man in Tesco

52 replies

Night409 · 16/11/2023 13:56

I went to Tesco earlier.
I only needed a handful of things so I went directly to them, instead of wondering up and down the aisles.

There was a man walking down the centre of the aisle looking at either side.
I needed something at the end of the aisle, so tried walking past him.

When I got to him he would walk on, then if I went to the left he’d go left and block me and then I’d go right and he’d go right to block me again.
I said excuse me and tried to get past him but he’d quickly go in front of me.

He definitely saw me because he’d put his head down pretending to look at the shelves but look at me at the side of eye.

At first I thought he was joking but there was no smiling or anything.
I thought perhaps he was trying to hit on me and I wasn’t in the mood, so I pretended I hadn’t noticed.

I stopped and pretended to look at something and he stopped.
Then when I moved he moved in front of me.
He wasn’t smiling or trying to be funny.

I then took something off the shelf and went back the other way.
Then I went to a different aisle and he did it again.

In the end I pretended to look at a product, so he pretended to look at something and then I quickly pushed past him and said oops sorry.

I seem to get hit on a lot when I go shopping recently (does cold weather = desperate men?) and it annoys me so I just keep my head down, do my shopping and leave but I don’t even think this man was hitting on me, I think he was just being a dick but I don’t know why!

I’m really annoyed with myself that I let it happen but I’m not sure what I should have done or said.

What would you have done or said?

Would you have given him the satisfaction of a reaction or tried to ignore him like I did?

OP posts:
Pinkpinkpink15 · 16/11/2023 14:00

I would have escaped from the aisle & gone for my other things then back for the things in that aisle. Most people are mad, not bad. I just eye roll to myself & get on with my day 🙅🏻‍♀️.

rwalker · 16/11/2023 14:00

I find people in general just zig zag all over shopping isle
happens all the time to me you go to get past and the walk where u want to be
dint get the impression it’s personal there just in a world of there own

Original poster
Night409 · 16/11/2023 14:04

rwalker · 16/11/2023 14:00

I find people in general just zig zag all over shopping isle
happens all the time to me you go to get past and the walk where u want to be
dint get the impression it’s personal there just in a world of there own

No he was in front of me and watching me and when I went left he quickly stepped in front of me.

Then he’d watch me and I’d go right and he’d stop in front of me.

He wasn’t picking anything up off the shelves.

It was definitely done on purpose but I’m not sure why!

OP posts:
Original poster
Night409 · 16/11/2023 14:05

Pinkpinkpink15 · 16/11/2023 14:00

I would have escaped from the aisle & gone for my other things then back for the things in that aisle. Most people are mad, not bad. I just eye roll to myself & get on with my day 🙅🏻‍♀️.

That’s what I thought.
Perhaps he was a bit crazy as he wasn’t even smiling.

I did double back and go the other way up the aisle but then he found me again in a different aisle.

OP posts:
Knackeredhamster · 16/11/2023 14:07

I probably would have said, right if you don't let me pass I'm going to speak to one of the staff.

Or, if I'd had a chance to get away I would have said nothing then spoken to someone.

Nonplusultra · 16/11/2023 14:08

Because of my own experiences I count it a solid win if I get away from people like this.
I don’t need to have the last word, a witty put down or cool ju jitsu moves.

You handled it fine op.

OceanicBoundlessness · 16/11/2023 14:12

There's no knowing why he was doing this so I think you handled it well.
The only thing I might have considered is speaking to security about him in case he's known or so they can keep an eye in future.

SummersBackHome · 16/11/2023 14:18

The only thing I might have considered is speaking to security about him in case he's known or so they can keep an eye in future.

Yes, I’d have done this. My nephew works part time in a supermarket and they get some regulars who are very strange that they have to move on.

Original poster
Night409 · 16/11/2023 14:18

Nonplusultra · 16/11/2023 14:08

Because of my own experiences I count it a solid win if I get away from people like this.
I don’t need to have the last word, a witty put down or cool ju jitsu moves.

You handled it fine op.

You’re absolutely right.

I was annoyed at myself for walking away and not saying or doing anything about it.

But he was obviously doing it for a reason and so I’m glad I didn’t react.

OP posts:
Original poster
Night409 · 16/11/2023 14:19

Next time I will tell a member of staff and so they can keep an eye on him.

I wasn’t in there for very long but he didn’t pick anything up and so could be doing this to a lot of people.

OP posts:
frazzled22 · 16/11/2023 14:22

I would of turned round and gone the other way then gone back to that aisle

NorthCliffs · 16/11/2023 14:23

I would've said 'Excuse me!' loudly, pushed past, done my shopping, then had a quiet word with security on the way out. But I'm direct like that. Life's too short to deal with twatty people.

TheLightSideOfTheMoon · 16/11/2023 14:26

“Do you need HELP?”

”Where is your CARER?”

”Do you know WHERE you ARE?”

Call people out on batshit behaviour. I have no idea why we put up with it.

Bambooshoot · 16/11/2023 14:32

NorthCliffs · 16/11/2023 14:23

I would've said 'Excuse me!' loudly, pushed past, done my shopping, then had a quiet word with security on the way out. But I'm direct like that. Life's too short to deal with twatty people.

You are so much more polite than me! After the first few steps of the Tesco tango I’d have just said “will you get the xxxx out of the way!” and pushed past. And I wonder why no one hits on me in supermarkets. I’m so lovely!

MarilynSays · 16/11/2023 14:41

i would've just done a very passive aggressive " Do you need a member of staff to help you dear? Are you alright?" Then either got staff to help me or roll my eyes and walk off. Prob then go to another supermarket because I would be too scared to ever bump into him again! 😂

AgaMM · 16/11/2023 14:50

I mean, you don’t know that this guy was trying to hit on you, so that’s a bit of a random assumption. Some people are just odd and he probably had a bone to pick over something you have no idea about!

You did well though. Yes you could have confronted him but sometimes it’s not worth it. Don’t waste any more head space on him.

PumpkinFence · 16/11/2023 14:53

It’s very easy for us to comment when we are at home and safe and have time to think. I would have probably just wanted to get away and in an ideal world alerted a member of staff

TheWomanTheyCallJayne · 16/11/2023 14:53

AgaMM · 16/11/2023 14:50

I mean, you don’t know that this guy was trying to hit on you, so that’s a bit of a random assumption. Some people are just odd and he probably had a bone to pick over something you have no idea about!

You did well though. Yes you could have confronted him but sometimes it’s not worth it. Don’t waste any more head space on him.

Op says they didn’t think he was so that assumption wasn’t made

Fiftyvines · 16/11/2023 14:56

frazzled22 · 16/11/2023 14:22

I would of turned round and gone the other way then gone back to that aisle

This is exactly what i would have done or moved on to another aisle/item and come back at the end. I have no patience for games and if he wants to be a dick that's on him.

Elastica23 · 16/11/2023 15:05

I'd have stepped on him, or kicked his leg hard as I strode over him to get the item I needed "Oops!"

Floooooof · 16/11/2023 15:06

I'd have said "excuse me, can I get past please?" loudly and a stared at him until he moved aside. Even if I still needed something in that Isle, I'd have to make a point....but I might be a bit bloody minded

VWT5 · 16/11/2023 15:10

I might have spoken randomly into my phone while looking at him and saying “yes, black trousers, green anorak, balding……can you see him on screen?……long pause….. etc…let him think security are watching.

I’ve done this successfully when feeling threatened at a railway station, also given a thumbs-up sign to a random window overlooking the rail line…enough for the perpetrator to think twice and move on.

Original poster
Night409 · 16/11/2023 15:14

frazzled22 · 16/11/2023 14:22

I would of turned round and gone the other way then gone back to that aisle

I did do that and he did it again in a different aisle.

OP posts:
Original poster
Night409 · 16/11/2023 15:17

Floooooof · 16/11/2023 15:06

I'd have said "excuse me, can I get past please?" loudly and a stared at him until he moved aside. Even if I still needed something in that Isle, I'd have to make a point....but I might be a bit bloody minded

I said excuse me a couple of times but he pretended he couldn’t hear me.

In the end I pretend to go to the right to look at something and then when he did it too, I quickly pushed past him and said oops sorry before he had time to block me.

I was annoyed that I wasn’t direct enough though!

OP posts:
Original poster
Night409 · 16/11/2023 15:18

VWT5 · 16/11/2023 15:10

I might have spoken randomly into my phone while looking at him and saying “yes, black trousers, green anorak, balding……can you see him on screen?……long pause….. etc…let him think security are watching.

I’ve done this successfully when feeling threatened at a railway station, also given a thumbs-up sign to a random window overlooking the rail line…enough for the perpetrator to think twice and move on.

Great idea!

OP posts:
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