Flatmate says I owe her £600

[Digestivesandcheese]

I was meeting my flatmate (who is also a good friend) in London recently and agreed to bring her weekend bag with me on the train (She was meeting her DM earlier in the day for a trip to the Theatre) I had a rucksack containing my things for the weekend.
I got off the train in London and realised I had stupidly left her bag on the train. I got back on the train but the bag was gone! It hasn't turned up in lost property. I have chased up several times.
My friend says I owe her £600 for the bag and contents. I agree it was my fault but can I claim compensation from the rail company as the bag hasn't turned up? If not, I will have to borrow money to pay my friend for her things

OP, I think the first mistake you made was telling your friend and this thread you 'left her bag on the train'.

I would say to leave a bag on a train would be to leave it on there and realise hours later or after the train had pulled away. That isn't what happened here, as you went back for it straight away, and you realised it had been stolen or somebody took it by mistake (it happens).

Was her bag labelled at all with a number and an address?

I wouldn't have taken responsibility for her bag with expensive belongings in, not without agreeing that if anything happened to the bag

@daisychain01 hindsight is a wonderful thing. This is not something that would ever cross my mind to do, unless a similar situation to OP had happened and I learned from my mistake. Also not very helpful to outline what she should've done. Make her feel worse 🙈

Great example of the saying "no good deed goes unpunished".

You do a friend a favour, make a mistake, and end up with a huge financial punishment.

Personally if I was the friend I wouldn't expect you to pay - you were doing her a favour, and made a careless but easy enough to make mistake. Someone took advantage and stole the bag.

I'm sorry she is making you pay £600 OP - it sould like this isn't easy for you to cover.

It's good of you OP. I wouldn't expect it from my friend.

My travel insurance covers me for things like this even on long weekends in the UK. Do you have any?

This friend is also her flatmate. Can you imagine the Ill feeling and atmosphere there would be, if the OP doesn’t cough up for the bag SHE lost?

Think of it like this…if a friend of yours borrows your car, forgets to lock it and it’s stolen, you wouldn’t expect her to pay for it? Remember, if the vehicle isn’t locked and is stolen, the insurance is void and you wouldn’t get anything from your insurance company! You wouldn’t have an issue losing several thousands of pounds?? After all you took a chance in loaning her the car.

I had a suitcase go missing once, I eventually got it back after 6 weeks so you never know.
How can you be 100% sure the items in and the bag itself came to £600? She could've just chosen that figure at random to suit herself.

Unless she's got proof of purchase for the bag and all its items?

If I fucked up and left a friend’s bag, that I had assumed responsibility for, on a train then I would pay for it. I would expect a friend to do the same in the event they lost my belongings.

£600 may be a lot of money for OP, but it isn’t a lot of money for a mid range bag, makeup and other personal care items.

Have you reported the theft? Which is what it was. Obviously you will be much more careful in future but you might be able to get cheap travel insurance through your bank account or similar

What a horrible attitude. Of course she should pay!

Is it it just? Some people are past belief.

Do friends/flatmates really ask their friends/flatmates who was helping them to bring a bag, to pay for said luggage if it gets lost/stolen/forgotten?
That doesn't sound like friendship.
OP, you have my commiserations.

OPs insurance is unlikely to cover her for losing someone else's belongings. I got burgled and mentioned to the assessor that a guitar belonged to a friend and it was instantly removed from the claim.

I wouldn’t pay the full amount, get her to itemise, reduce for wear and tear.

It might also be worth going to citizens advice. in fact I would do this first.

It was stolen, you didn’t lose it. You should make a theft report.

I would never speak to her again, if you do have to pay for any of it.

I really wouldn’t.

It was probably stolen, before you got off the train, to be honest. Think carefully.

If I was your friend I wouldn't ask for £600 when you were doing me a favour and while very annoying- it is a stupid mistake and obviously someone has nicked it.

It's quite possible that the goods cost a fair bit more than £600, and she's rounding down. And it would be a pain to have to replace everything.

On the other hand, you take a risk of your own if you decide to give stuff to someone else to look after (I weighed this up when letting a friend borrow my car - ie: can i afford to pay if they have an accident?)
Whether I would ask a friend for the full amount would probably depend on my salary vs her salary - and possibly round it down to £500

If I had lost something belonging to a friend, yes, I would probably offer to pay for it. But if I had lost the item in the course of doing a favour for said friend, I would be absolutely gobsmacked if my friend decided to accept my offer of payment.

Yes, decent people offer to pay for their mistakes. However, decent friends would never expect others to be out of pocket as a result of trying to help them.

If the OP is a bad friend for not wanting to pay, her friend is an equally bad friend for expecting it. If you entrust expensive items to someone else without any insurance, so that they can do you a favour, then you do so entirely at your own risk in my view.

Lending me a car would presumably be for my benefit. The OP was doing her friend a favour, so it was for the friend's benefit.

In the OP's situation, I would offer to pay. But if my friend was selfish enough to accept the payment, then I would start thinking about how to phase her out of my life. Decent people do not treat their friends like shit.

Yes. If you assume responsibility for someone else’s belongings and lose them, then absolutely.

I would expect a friend to offer, as I would. I wouldn’t consider someone who didn’t to be a friend.

I wouldn't. I'd replace the vital stuff myself (straighteners for example) and shrug my shoulders over the stuff that wasn't vital (clothes.)

Crikey, to replace my bag if I lost it today would be around £6.49

I guess it's difficult if you live together. Also depends how vindictive she is. Is she the type to air dirty laundry all over social media/make your life hell if you don't pay the £600?

I'd expect them to offer and then I'd say no don't be silly, it was an accident and you were doing me a favour. And that would be an end to it and we'd still be friends. Assuming it was a good friendship that I wanted to keep, that's far more important.

Decent people do not treat their friends like shit
Indeed they don't. Leaving £600 worth of a friend's belongings on a train and then shrugging your shoulders would be doing just that.