Backstory - Very quiet and introverted. No family. Difficult childhood. Zero community where I live. Made redundant after about 20 years in a nice workplace. During pandemic voluntary work closed. Friends and colleagues retreated into themselves and I stopped eventually when it became one-sided.
Started again using every bit of courage. Been doing some courses and got another job. Get on with them, nice people and made efforts but no friendship. Situational.
I wanted to volunteer for a certain charity for over 30 years in memory of the one lovely relative I had. I was too young to help them but wanted to help others. Every time I enquired there were no vacancies but then there were.
Started properly a year ago after months of training, chasing various people including Head Office for nearly a year for a DBS (all clear) and having six months probation. Very few people get that far.
Problem is it's a toxic antisocial environment. The trainer gave no real support or feedback. Hard from another volunteer I'd been successful!
Few pleasant enough people but 95% have been there years having agendas, are competitive, unapproachable, do hardly anything, cliquey and just turn up to gossip about each other. I'm there to help and don't get involved in that and just kept my head down more and more after being snubbed as a newcomer. I was horrified and am clearly naïve that a charity could be like this when you'd think they'd be kind, whatever their reason for being there. People are leaving and retiring so they need new volunteers who are made to feel unwelcome.
Too many chiefs yet no structure, pass the buck and ignore. The role is tough and that doesn't bother me but the lack of support and camaraderie does when you're dealing with things that can be distressing. You're totally on your own. I've had a few difficult situations and have be. If you reach out you get shut down.
I stopped going as it became too difficult and again, didn't know who to talk to and nobody's interested anyway. Two months later somebody emailed asking if there was anything they could do and they were looking forward to having me back. Very friendly email but I don't know them.
Emailed the director for a two month break which is ending shortly. I really wanted to do this but don't feel able to in this environment. I just feel like resigning but am really upset and feel very guilty when there's so many that need help yet, oh the irony!
No wonder there's a volunteer shortage and it's maddening when I have the resources. Could volunteer other places but after this and having been turned down a few times in the past I won't bother anymore. Better off sitting in front of the TV after work. Sad and lonely but at least you know where you stand and don't get messed about.
Sorry for essay but needed a vent and nobody to talk to. Hope nobody else has experienced but experience says different 