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Original poster

Bad haircut sympathy

31 replies

Ormonde · 25/10/2023 17:03

I booked myself a cut and colour to update my style and cover the greys that have sprouted on top. I asked for highlights and lowlights to cover the greys and a shag style haircut. They wrote this on the form and I signed it.

Anyway, the stylist did highlights throughout but only did lowlights on top to cover the greys. So my hair is two different colours now. Not even two good colours, it’s visibly stripy. And the style she’s cut isn’t a shag. I questioned this and she said “a shag is just a shaggy layered haircut and that’s what you have”. I said no, a shag is a specific haircut like a mullet is a specific haircut. She shrugged and said “well that’s my version of a shag”. It absolutely isn’t a shag, it’s more like a bob.

So I complained, and she sent for the manager, who brought my form and insisted I had exactly what I’d signed for. I pointed out again that my haircut wasn’t a shag, and the stylist said that’s her version of a shag. The manager started shouting and told me to pay and get out and don’t come back.

I’m autistic and I don’t cope well with confrontation or shouting. So I had a meltdown. Which they responded with more shouting. The manager took my purse from my bag and thrust it in my face, and yelled at me to get my card out, then shoved the payment machine in my face and started yelling to tap my card. Then she threw my bag and coat outside in the street, and when I went to get them she locked the door.

I’ve had a really hard time lately, and I just wanted to look nice and feel better, and I don’t. It’s cost me a lot and my hair is a mess, and I’ll have to borrow money to get someone else to fix it. Now I’m really scared to go to another hairdresser too. I’m on the verge of just shaving my head.

OP posts:
Mamette · 25/10/2023 17:11

Wow OP. They sound like absolute pondlife.

Did they make you tap your card? I would report the transaction to the bank and explain you did not authorise it.

Do not shave your head. Take the rest of today to treat yourself to nice things that you enjoy and try to put those imbeciles out of your mind.

If the bank cancels the transaction you could try another salon. Check reviews first.

cansu · 25/10/2023 17:11

I am guessing that the part where you had a meltdown has a bit to do with what happened. A shag haircut can be done in lots of different ways. Just Google it and you will see many variations. Hard to say it was done bay without seeing it. Your reaction seems to have not been within the bounds of acceptable though.

Phonedown · 25/10/2023 17:15

I'm so sorry this happened to you.

The hairdresser had no right to touch your belongings or to shout at you.

The Consumer Rights Act 2015 (England and Wales) says:

  • If a service was not provided with reasonable care and skill or as agreed, the service provider must put things right within a reasonable time and at their own cost.

The problem is that they behaved in such a heavy handed way that you rightly don't want to go back there.

If I were you I would be tempted to give them one more chance to refund you for your hair cut. But I wouldn't approach them. I would write to them and tell them that the haircut is not what you asked for the colour is unacceptable. Take plenty of pictures and include a picture of your bad hair alongside a picture of what you would have expected it to look like. Tell them that you would have been happy to allow them to rectify the hair do but due to their unreasonable violation of your personal space and abusive behaviour you now insist on a refund. If they don't give it to you, explain that you will be contacting trading standards and posting the pictures and a detailed description of what happened to you on all social media and review platforms.

Please don't shave your head. This is likely to be very fixable.

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about this subject:

Beauty
Phonedown · 25/10/2023 17:18

@cansu you can't possibly know what ops reaction was without asking her what she means by meltdown. Most people who work with the public are now aware of different neurotypes or at the very least how not to escalate high conflict situations. These hairdressers escalated the situation and potentially broke the law by physically removing ops purse from her bag. The op has every right to be shaken and upset.

Chewbecca · 25/10/2023 17:27

Sorry to hear you had such a bad time. I bet you look a lot better than you think.

Might it be easiest to try to forget about the experience and just never return to that place? Hair grows so quickly and looks completely different after a home wash / dry.

Maybe take pics with you next time you visit a salon to avoid any misunderstanding. When I google image a shag haircut, I get many different styles.

Hipnotised · 25/10/2023 17:31

I think the mix up has been where you wrote 'highlights and lowlights to cover the greys' which they have taken as: Highlights. And lowlights to cover the greys. Whereas you meant both to cover.

And the shag style equally could have (and was) interpreted differently.

Next time take a picture.

But I certainly wouldn't go back there.

Phonedown · 25/10/2023 17:35

I agree that haircuts can be misinterpreted but that is why hairdressers are trained to find out exactly what the client wants by having robust consultations and even checking with pics on their own phones if necessary. If all of us non-hairdressers know there is ambiguity in descriptions of hair, then the person being paid a lot of money to cut hair should also be aware of the ambiguity. And if a mistake is made or they have misinterpreted what has been said then the best response is to say "Aw I'm really sorry you don't love it, can we try to find some pics of what you were looking for and we can book you back in asap to see if we can match it better." Not verbal and physical aggression.

honkersbonkers38 · 25/10/2023 17:36

@Phonedown is right - that's what I'd do. Write - see if you can get a refund. Give a time limit (maybe 7 days). Then follow @Mamette's suggestion and report to the bank. You did not authorise the transaction - you disputed it. It was taken by coercion. Get the bank to challenge it.
And then try to focus on doing a few nice things for yourself to re-balance.

Rogue1001MNer · 25/10/2023 17:42

Firstly, @Ormonde I'm so sorry this happened to you. It sounds horrendous for ANYONE. So sending hugs n love for that.

Very gently, and honestly not trying to be nasty, I just googled shag haircuts, and before even clicking, Google gave me several suggestions
Short
Modern
With bangs
Pixie
For women over 60, etc
So it does seem like there's a lot of scope for misunderstanding.

But ignore that, be kind to yourself tonight and maybe tomorrow there'll be a way for a different hairdresser to rectify it.
But hugs for now

xogossipgirlxo · 25/10/2023 17:53

how horrible. I hope you’ll leave them google review

Original poster
Ormonde · 25/10/2023 18:55

I did show a picture. I gave them this photo and ended up with a bob like this. Shag has more weight on top and thinner at the bottom. Also my hair is two different colours.

I think the mix up has been where you wrote 'highlights and lowlights to cover the greys' which they have taken as: Highlights. And lowlights to cover the greys. Whereas you meant both to cover.
But why would you make someone’s hair two different colours? Nobody wants one colour on top and another underneath. It doesn’t seem a sensible thing to do.

They did not force me to pay as such. They took my purse from my bag and put it in my hand, then thrust the card machine at me and demanded me to pay. I took the card out of my purse and tapped it because I was scared and overwhelmed. So I suppose I did authorise the transaction.

When I say I had an autistic meltdown I mean I lost it. Their confronting and yelling was too much. It was very hard for me to go to the hairdresser to start with, I had already struggled being there for three hours. So when they yelled at me I lost control of my behaviour and cried and screamed, and started rocking back and forth and stimming, and hitting myself on the head. That was when the manager took my purse from my bag and said “pay and get out or we will call the police”.

I am just very shaken and upset, and out of pocket. I had told them before my appointment that I’m autistic and felt very anxious about coming. I said I didn’t want my head rubbed with a towel because it upsets me, and I didn’t want styling products on my hair because I can’t stand the smell, etc. I never go to the hairdresser but I pushed myself because I was sick of the greys making me look old. I wanted to look nice for once. But it was just an awful experience.

Bad haircut sympathy
Bad haircut sympathy
OP posts:
cansu · 25/10/2023 19:10

You have a lovely haircut if you have what is on the right. I think photos are not easy. Perhaps with your hair length and type she couldn't reproduce that.
Regardless your reaction was probably very upsetting for you and them. I think you perhaps need to take someone with you next time.

Original poster
Ormonde · 25/10/2023 19:37

Or maybe they shouldn’t yell at people who politely say they aren’t satisfied.

OP posts:
Wendysfriend · 25/10/2023 20:07

It's shocking how you were treated, I don't know what to say, I am just gobsmacked that this happened to you

Is the pic on the right your hair ? If it is it's absolutely gorgeous, it's so healthy looking and shiny and I love the curl. I don't normally comment on pics posted here but if I think something looks shit I'll say it. It's actually so nice that I'm now considering getting a curl done in my own.

Is the manager the owner ? Maybe you could contact the owner ? There has to be something that can be done for the way you were treated

Rogue1001MNer · 25/10/2023 20:15

The haircut on the right is GORGEOUS!!!

And doesn't look like it's 2 colours AT ALL.
(And you're v pretty!)

Anetra · 25/10/2023 20:16

I know of a lot of people in retail would be horrified and scared if someone started yelling and punching themselves in the head

cansu · 25/10/2023 20:16

No they shouldn't be rude to customers. It is however hard to judge given you describe yourself shouting and having a complete meltdown. It is hard to imagine you went from polite dissatisfaction to total meltdown. In any event it was clearly an awful experience I usually find that with hair it is best to give it a few days to decide what you think.

HazardLights · 25/10/2023 20:19

Rogue1001MNer · 25/10/2023 20:15

The haircut on the right is GORGEOUS!!!

And doesn't look like it's 2 colours AT ALL.
(And you're v pretty!)

I’m guessing that it’s an example, rather than the OP herself

Wendysfriend · 25/10/2023 20:26

HazardLights · 25/10/2023 20:19

I’m guessing that it’s an example, rather than the OP herself

Show quote history

Oh I thought it was the OP too. I was wondering how it looked so perfect.

biscuitnut · 25/10/2023 20:27

haircuts can be very subjective. Even a photo is not a guarantee you will end up with your hair looking as requested. Your texture, thickness etc could be very different to the photo. You have autism and can’t help how you reacted but on the side of the hairdresser they have other clients to think of and probably just wanted you out. Get someone you trust to check your hair. It might not be anywhere as bad as you think. If a trusted friend or family member thinks your hair is a disgrace then ask them to take a photo and then ask for a refund. I have cried my eyes out over what I think is a disaster before now and found I actually quite like my hair after a few days. At the end of the day it’s hair, it can be fixed I promise

Original poster
Ormonde · 25/10/2023 20:57

Rogue1001MNer · 25/10/2023 20:15

The haircut on the right is GORGEOUS!!!

And doesn't look like it's 2 colours AT ALL.
(And you're v pretty!)

That isn’t my hair. It’s the closest match I could find on the internet. Mine is brown on top and brassy blonde underneath. And it’s a weird shape.

OP posts:
Original poster
Ormonde · 25/10/2023 20:59

At the end of the day it’s hair, it can be fixed I promise
By getting into debt to pay someone else, and going through all the trauma of a hairdresser visit again.

OP posts:
Pccleaner · 25/10/2023 20:59

That’s awful. Leave a bad review for them. You deserve better than that treatment.

Anetra · 25/10/2023 21:01

could you put a wee home dye on it for now? I don’t know how you’ll cope with another hairdresser visit

Anniecott · 25/10/2023 21:21

I can't believe how many of you seem to be defending the hairdresser because the op had a meltdown when over stimulated in a stressful situation. The hairdresser has handled it appalling, I'm a stylist in a salon and we deal with clients on the spectrum every day in the salon, as so many people are neurodiverse, and we have to learn to accept and adapt to make every ones appointment a good experience. That aside the least you should expect when you have your hair done is get what you asked for, if your hair is not suitable for the cut and colour you ask for, it is up to the stylist to explain that and make suggestions that will work, that hasn't been done here.
Op i would ask a trusted friend or family member to ring the salon on your behalf if you don't feel able to ask to speak to the owner, they don't deserve to have the chance to fix it, not many salons offer refunds but in this case I think you should fight for one.
Where abouts do you live?