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Original poster

Who is your “SIL”?

109 replies

Raincloudsonasunnyday · 23/10/2023 22:50

Is it:

  1. your DH’s sister
  2. your brother’s wife
  3. your DH’s brother’s wife
  4. 1 and 2 only
  5. all of 1, 2 and 3?

Having a not-quite-an-argument with my DH.

OP posts:
maimeo · 23/10/2023 22:57

One and two only. Not related at all to three!

Really?!

Are your DH’s brother’s DC related to you?

Yes they are, there's a genetic connection. But no shared genes between me and my brother in law's wife😊

Rockgod · 23/10/2023 22:57

That’s stumped me.

But I’m thinking, in number 3, my DH’s brother is defo my brother in law but brother in law’s wife is not brother in law’s sibling (it’s his wife) so how does she become a ‘sister’ in law?m

So I’m going 1&2 only and wishing I was Indian/Spanish or from another country where we could have names for them all.

Hadalifeonce · 23/10/2023 22:57

Interesting, I speak about my SiL' s husband either as that or my DH's BiL.

TheDogsMother · 23/10/2023 22:58

One and two only.

SantaBarbaraMonica · 23/10/2023 22:58

All

Rockgod · 23/10/2023 22:58

edited my original post to make more sense

SkaneTos · 23/10/2023 22:58

Mostly 1 and 2.
But it can definitely be all of them.

And I agree with a previous poster, it can also be the sister of your wife/female partner (etc.)

ChaToilLeam · 23/10/2023 22:59

1 and 2 (if I had a brother, which I don’t).

YokoOnosBigHat · 23/10/2023 22:59

All of the above.

Original poster
Raincloudsonasunnyday · 23/10/2023 22:59

I think all of them are! And k think my DH’s siblings’ DC are equally my nieces and nephews BECAUSE they’re my DCs’ cousins.

If I had no DC and I split from DH, don’t think I’d see his nieces and nephews as mine. I’d prob refer to all the women as SIL’s or ex-SILs depending on whether they’re my brothers’ wives or DH’s sisters (former) or DH’s brother’s wife (latter).

Which isn’t logical or consistent, really…

Weird one

OP posts:
Lizzieregina · 23/10/2023 23:00

4

my brother’s wife or my husband’s sister only

Also the offspring of DH’s siblings are his nieces and nephews, not mine.

Original poster
Raincloudsonasunnyday · 23/10/2023 23:00

maimeo · 23/10/2023 22:57

One and two only. Not related at all to three!

Really?!

Are your DH’s brother’s DC related to you?

Yes they are, there's a genetic connection. But no shared genes between me and my brother in law's wife😊

Um, there’s a genetic connection between your husband’s brother’s children and you? Yikes!

OP posts:
AllProperTeaIsTheft · 23/10/2023 23:00

All of the above. And, Mumsnet notwithstanding, for those of us no longer living in the 1950s, DH can be replaced by DP!

a) Nobody is living in the 1950s, regardless of their marital status and b) I'm pretty sure that technically the status of in-law is conferred by actual marriage.

OhDoSitDownAndShutUp · 23/10/2023 23:01

Husband's sister
Brother's wife.

That's all. Hsuband's brother's wife is Husband's SIL.

Blanketpolicy · 23/10/2023 23:02

All for me.

Cambridge dictionary

the wife of your brother or sister, or the sisterof your husband or wife, or the wife of the brother or sister of your husband or wife

TenderChicken · 23/10/2023 23:04

1and 2 only.

I have a number 3 and I've never thought of her as my SIL. She is BIL's wife.

Rockgod · 23/10/2023 23:04

maimeo · 23/10/2023 22:57

One and two only. Not related at all to three!

Really?!

Are your DH’s brother’s DC related to you?

Yes they are, there's a genetic connection. But no shared genes between me and my brother in law's wife😊

There is no genetic connection between your DH’s brothers kids and you. Unless there’s something you’re not telling us…😂🙈🤔

ColleenDonaghy · 23/10/2023 23:05

4 - it's only the first two technically. But fine to use it for 3 informally I think unless the actual degree of relationship is relevant.

DeadButDelicious · 23/10/2023 23:10

I have never actually thought about this in depth and now I'm confused 😂. My DH's sister is my SIL and I've always referred to her husband as my brother in law mostly because he's my DH's brother in law and now I don't know whether that's 'right' or not. It's too late in the day for this. 😂😂

mrsfollowill · 23/10/2023 23:10

This has thrown me! I have no brothers - only a sister and her husband is my BIL.
DH has sisters and brothers (one of six) His sisters are my SILs. I always think of his brothers wives as my SILs too. The brothers children have a genetic link to my DH and to my own son but not to me. My DH sees my sister as his SIL - but then only my son and I have the genetic link to her. My head hurts now so I'm going to have a G&T and a ponder Grin

AnotherEmma · 23/10/2023 23:12

Raincloudsonasunnyday · 23/10/2023 22:50

Is it:

  1. your DH’s sister
  2. your brother’s wife
  3. your DH’s brother’s wife
  4. 1 and 2 only
  5. all of 1, 2 and 3?

Having a not-quite-an-argument with my DH.

  1. your spouse's sister
  2. your sibling's wife
  3. the wife of your spouse's sibling

Women can marry women, remember!
(and FWIW I think it's all 3... I'm not sure if #3 is technically a SIL but it's too much of a mouthful to explain each time, so SIL it is)

CherryMyBrandy · 23/10/2023 23:14

1, 2 and 3.

My DH has two brothers. They are both my BILs, and their wives are obviously SILs. It would be weird if they were nothing!

CherryMyBrandy · 23/10/2023 23:15

CherryMyBrandy · 23/10/2023 23:14

1, 2 and 3.

My DH has two brothers. They are both my BILs, and their wives are obviously SILs. It would be weird if they were nothing!

Also, if they weren't my SILs, they would be my DH's SILs (as his brother's wives) but not mine, which would also be weird.

CorylusAgain · 23/10/2023 23:15

1 and 2 but understand why 3 might be referred to as sil simply because there isn't a specific term. But for me it would be dh's sil or BIL's wife rather than my sil.