Talk some sense into me! Decluttering old clothes

[Iamlikesorry]

I've recently moved house, its lovely but smaller. We've got rid of years of useless possessions that have accumulated. (Now late 50's).

But....

I have a huge wardrobe of clothes, some go back 20 years, very few fit me now. I really struggle to let go.

Even I were to lose 4/5 stone, I'd surely want to buy new things. I'm not so hard up I couldnt start the process.

But I think underneath I feel that if I give them all to a charity shop (they're decent but not high fashion) I'd finally be admitting I wouldn't be a 12 again. Plus I think of all the money spent over the years!

Being a 12 again is not dependent on what old clothes I still possess. That could happen regardless (with a huge sustained lifestyle change!)

Help me!

Why am I struggling so much? (Suspect I might be ADHD, DD and nephew have been diagnosed recently and I see lots of behavioral/emotional similarities! Not sure its remotely relevant though)

Talk some sense into me.

Cant move properly into our bedroom, its full of clothes with not enough space to put them!

Following with interest!

Would it make you feel better if you sold them?
Do you think you didn't get your money's worth out of them when you were wearing them?

The money they cost was sent years ago. You could have spent the same money on daily coffees or meals out or something and you wouldn't have clutter, but you'd still have spent the money.

They are clothes for who you used to be, not who you are now. Whittle through them, keep only the things you love. Donate or sell the rest.

Could you do it in stages? That might feel more manageable than a massive clear out all in one go. You could start with the obvious ones that you really don't think you'd wear even if you were suddenly a size 12 - there must be some. Then come back to it in a month or so and get rid of a few more. And so on.

I suspect it's a bit about hanging onto youth.

Some have nice memories attached.

But it also makes me feel a bit crap looking at them thinking that I used to have a nice shaped body! But I didn't even think that at the time!

I could try and sell a few of the nicer labels. (Not many of them!)

It is difficult but you can do this! I recently bagged up and got rid of all my short dresses and leggings because I noticed that the style has changed and they looked dated. I don't miss them because I would never choose to wear them. I now swoosh around in billowing long dresses like someone from Little House on the Prairie 😁

Can you look through for anything that is really out of fashion to go first?

Watch Stacey Solomon Sort Your Life Out on BBC, or Nick Knowles Big House Clear Out on Ch5, or Marie Condo on Netflix for some inspiration! This is what has kickstarted my declutter and clear out.

8ts so satisfying once you get started!

If you don't love it, if it doesn't fit, if it doesn't bring you joy.....sell or donate it.

Good luck

Just read your own post. You have talked enough sense to yourself already. No more is needed. Time for action.

I'm addicted to these!

We've done really well in other areas of the house and feeling the benefits. I think Stacey was talking about clothes in the last episode which touched a nerve, I'll go back and have another look.

Try " how many do I need?" As an exercise.

Pick a small(ish) subset so rather than "all my trousers" go for jeans or "work trousers"
Work out how many is reasonable to have eg. 5 pairs of jeans.

Take out all jeans pick your 5 that are in good condition and fit.
Take remaining and sort into bin, charity and vinted.
Vinted takes 60secs to list and even suggests a price. List at highest suggested price max.

I use this exercise with my DH.

I also know it's so hard to part with lovely things you won't use. Currently selling clothes my DD has grown out of .. I initially was annoyed at listing them so cheaply on vinted but I've made already made £50 since Friday! And am reclaiming space!

Same here. I did lose weight last year (and piled it back on again) but found that even though all of my nice stuff fitted me again, I still didn’t wear much of it. There’s only so much clothes you need! When I was younger, and worked in an office, I’d choose lovely outfits every day. With handbags, shoes, jewellery, coats… (most of which I still have). Now, I’m a freelance worker & a mum. My style is different, too.

BUT, they’re all nice clothes! I have way too many, no space. I find them the hardest thing to part with. It’s why I could never Kondo successfully. Start with clothes first, because it’s the easiest? Um, no! However, I’d love a total revamp before I’m 50. And editing my wardrobe down to the stuff I’ll wear is essential to that. It’s so very hard though, OP. No wonder Vinted is so popular, clothes are rubbish nowadays!

I totally get this - we need to make space as there's a new baby on the way and all our cupboards are full of my old clothes. I'm also finding it hard to accept that I'm a couple of sizes bigger than I used to be and won't be fitting into some of the smallest ones again. But I did recently do as a PP suggested and start getting rid of things I probably wouldn't wear even if they fitted me - and I didn't miss them once they were gone. It's the getting rid part that's hard, not the fact they're actually gone.

I need to do this too!

I think I'm going too take the approach of "what am I going to keep" rather than "what am I going to get rid of". Assume it's all gone and you're starting from scratch. What items from your current wardrobe would you choose to "buy".

Now I just need to follow my own advice...

Read Marie Kondo. That book somehow reprogrammed my brain and I was easily able to get rid of things I had struggled with previously, literally 60% of my wardrobe went.

RU, great idea to shop your own wardrobe.

BB, yes to the small stuff. Even when I lost weight, and looked great, I still thought “I’ll get into my size 8s”…

I'm going to ask the woman for a commission 😂😂

dana k white is your woman for this. Her YouTube's are brilliant.

container concept - you can keep anything you want to, you just can't keep everything.

decide on a container (amount of space you are willing/able to give to clothes that don't fit you anymore. Put your favourites in first, if you come across something else you really love, ask yourself what you like less that's in the container& swap them out. Put the other in the donate box. Continue until you've got everything either in the container or donate box. You can, of course, use a second container, but you have to decide what else you're going to get rid of to make space for another container of clothes that no longer fit you.

it IS hard, but if you listen to Dana she makes sense & helps you take the emotion out of it.

I'm a similar age to you & I'm struggling with the change in mindset -the feeling of having run out of 'one days'.

i think you need to focus on those clothes no longer fitting your lifestyle even if they fitted your body again. I have a couple of suitcases in the loft of clothes that no longer fit (and never will) & I'm going to keep a pair of trousers that I love. & the first suit I bought when I started work. I think I'm ready to say 'good bye' to the rest. I don't want a ton of stuff that just sits in the loft & before long I'm not going to be able to access it myself (knees) & I don't want to have to ask someone else to deal with it.

I've done things this sort of way before - it's a totally different sort of psychology, much more positive. Things have to actually earn their keep in return for space in the wardrobe!

I could put everything on the spare bed, sort into piles, and just bring back in the most suitable.

I only want nice/useful things in this house. I've thrown away anything that was chipped or damaged. Why keep things that don't fit or I wont wear?

I'm actually starting to feel excited about something of a new image....

Should have said... If they don't sell on vinted in 4 weeks I halve the price.

After 6 weeks total they go to charity.

Would it help selling or donating to a 'good cause'? Maybe not just giving to a charity shop but maybe a woman's refuge, or for newly arrived refugees or something where you know the clothes will be needed.

Also just think of the lovely new updated wardrobe you'll be able to get when you're at your new healthiest self. In all honesty when I have lost weight and fitted back into things from years ago they haven't really been the kind of thing I want to wear anymore. I have to do things in stages though and often put things back in the wardrobe as I'm not ready to let go, and then get them back out in 6 months and do feel ready. Sometimes things go back in multiple times.

Would you even wear some of these clothes now? 20 years is a long time ago - these clothes will be very dated. Chuck or sell anything particularly nice on vinted

I gave away my thin clothes and found it jump started my weight loss, not quite sure why but it made me so much more determined (I am quite a contrary sort 🤣)

The thing that I found I had to do, when giving said thin clothes away, was to take a minute and thank each piece and for the more ‘important’ bits have a quick think about when I had worn it. I think because I had emotions attached to the clothes that were really about a memory of the event I needed that little bit of ritual to allow me to separate the two and pass the clothes on to a new home. Then after I had the box full to give them away I told them all to go and make their new owners happy…Im clearly also very sappy as well as contrary! I found the inspiration for doing that from Marie Kondo.

You could sign up to a SBS wardrobe declutter.

Giver her a follow on Instagram and she has Patreon too.

https://styledbysusie.co.uk/shop/

I'm feeling emboldened! Thanks for all your ideas.

I'm really enjoying the calmer atmosphere in other parts of the house.

Its just me now - clothes and aging Neal's Yard products etc. Have to remember they dont age like fine wines!

What is this?

Definitely use your posh face creams! And just refill the lovely pots. I’m terrible for keeping nice perfumes, etc…

STS, being a second-hand shopper all my life, I love the idea of a story behind the clothes. Gonna do that with mine!

Love being a second hand shopper!

And actually, it would be good for the planet if some of the stuff festering in my wardrobe had a new lease of life.

Listened to Dana White re containers. Makes so much sense.