If you work in pre-school childcare, what are your bugbears in children/parents?

[GlitteryGreen]

Just out of interest really as my 13mo little girl started nursery recently. She's usually breastfed to sleep and cosleeps at night, both of which I had to put on her entry forms, so I was concerned the nursery would find her a nightmare to get down.

Just wondering if there's anything you see in children that start which makes you think arghh nooo?!

I agree with @Brunointhemiddle In the age 3+ the biggest issue is lack of independence skills. I know its part of our job to teach this but starting with a child who can do nothing is really hard. We have some children who stand in front of the tap and look at us to turn it on. Obviously we teach them day 1 as our taps may be different to home. We hear 'but I can't do it!' all the time, to which we reply 'yes you can! You just need to try' and lo and behold they can do it first attempt. I remember last year a kid whose nose ran a lot, he had zero independence skills but after a few weeks he could walk to the table with the tissue box, blow his nose, put it in the bin and wash his hands if necessary. After mid term or holidays with parents he was back to standing with snot down to his lip pointing and making baby noises, we had to start over again. They didn't understand not only were they annoying us but seriously holding him back and damaging his confidence.

No, in my experience it has always been 'stolen'

God I miss nursery. The staff were fantastic: so kind and nurturing and child-focused and developed relationships with each child and genuinely cared about them as individual people. There was such excellent, open communication with parents and a real sense of working together on the children's needs. The shock of how appalling schools are in comparison has been really depressing. Nursery staff should be paid the same as school teachers IMO.

Easy to get off yes but putting on a fresh one requires taking off trousers/leggings/tights. When you are changing up to 10 nappies at a time it becomes a nightmare.

Its not about taking them off, it's having to strip their dungarees/tights/bottoms and shoes to put on a new one. Its a faff, especially if you're dealing with a poonami or a child who is being unco-operative. Or both! Not too bad if you only have the one child to change but when you have 12, it's a nightmare.

Sending in your child when it clearly has a snotty, constant runny nose with a lovely neon green colour to it!
Your child is clearly unwell and we have the lovely job of wiping their noses every minute of the day. Not to mention spreading their colds all over the nursery so other children catch it and so do the teachers.
We get that you have to work but so do we and wiping Johns, Jane and Jill’s nose takes the attention from all the other children.

Oh yes! The Pull-Up. Will never understand why children wear them when they are not being potty trained!!!

Echo everybody else about labelling clothing and making sure they have enough spares in their bag including socks, these seem to be forgotten often. Waterproof coat that is waterproof and not just showerproof. A proper warm coat in the winter. Shoes with velcro not laces. Name on water bottle. We have so many that come in unnamed. Older children will usually be able to recognise their own bottle but the younger ones will just say yes to any that they like the look of, this also applies to shoes!

Bringing in toys, how do parents expect me to be able distinguish between Jonny’s plastic cow and the 15 others at Nursery? And do parents honestly think I can go and look for it at a busy pick up time, when I have 25 other children to let out to their parents?

@steppingcarefully @FlowerPower12345 Oh of course 🤦‍♀️ I always much preferred pull ups before we potty trained (a potty training child shouldn’t be in pull ups anyway) as I found them easier than nappies but makes sense from a childcare POV.

@toadasoda DD1 is very independent and anything she doesn’t yet know how to do she will try to do. How do I teach her to blow her nose? Is there a guide on how to do that 😅

DO NOT BE LATE

Buy a bloody Sharpie and write their name on their stuff.

I worked in a nursery and I had my own sharpie, I would just scrawl write names in their clothing myself it it wasn't named.

My DS refuses to lie down for nappy changes so we use pull ups - even having to take his trousers off is quicker than the aggro for getting him to lie down. Saying that though I did ask our nursery if refer preferred normal nappies or pull ups, they said it was completely up to me and they had no issues with him lying down so I get normal nappies for them as it's cheaper! I think nursery staff need to remember some children act completely different to nursery as to at home. Eating is another example, he eats really well at nursery whereas at home we really struggle. DD is exactly the same and she's at school.
Why is everyone saying pull ups are only suitable for potty training though? I can't see how, surely it's still a nappy at the end of the day so the child shouldn't be in one if being potty trained

Yes echoing everyone here:

converse, vans, shoes with laces, shoes they have no hope of getting on themselves (if we can barely get them on how will they?!)

pull ups in general, no good for a quick change and shouldn’t be in a pull up if potty training

telling me your child is potty trained when in actual fact they are nowhere near ready and you just happen to be catching when they have a wee

not encouraging independence in self care or any tasks

turning up late or on the dot and then expecting a lengthy hand over

expecting a preschool style nursery with 30 children to follow your child’s individual routine to the letter

Dragging out drop off when your child is upset, please believe me your child does not want you to leave, but as soon as you’ve gone, 99% of the time they will settle and find something to do

telling your child they are not allowed to do certain activities because they have a new jumper on! Just put them in old clothes please, they need to explore mess etc

Actually yes this also!! We've defo noticed that children (in general) are picking up extra anxieties from parents these days. Making a big thing of some things is making the children nervous of it. Same as all the storybooks about being frightened of school etc. not helping their confidence at all. Most children have never even thought about it.

Yes and a quick concise cheerful handover please parents. When you hover and make cooing noises if they look like they might be wavering it will usually make them upset. A quick cheerful goodbye, have a lovely day, does wonders for them settling in. Don't make it into this big scary thing.

Yes totally agree, and please don’t make a huge thing over tiny disagreements between children- they are totally normal and a really valuable part of learning resilience.
Yes it makes you feel a bit anxious, but don't project that on to your child. Focus on the positives of your child’s day, of course acknowledge that something might have made them feel a bit sad for a few minutes, but the rest of the day was filled with fantastic, exciting things. Chat about those instead! Don’t dwell on the minor things and increase their anxiety levels.

@PenguinRainbows Nose blowing is tricky! It's really instinctive in some kids, others can't do it for ages so it's just a matter of wiping what's come out and waiting for the next trail to appear. It takes a lot of restraint to watch them dab the snot with the tissue and drag it across their cheek, that's where we would step in and help a little but never do it all for them. Then off to the bin themselves. The other day a little guy took about 20 tissues, all that remained in the box and was off to put them in the bin..he had forgotten the wipe his nose part 😁

And agree re dungarees etc. We have Halloween dress up next week, its a disaster. Half them will be superheroes and they can't manage the toilet alone. The other half will probably be witches or princesses and need someone to hold the skirt up! And they are allowed bring a treat so they will be high as kites. In fairness it's a really cute joyful day just full of impracticalities.

@toadasoda Yeah, I can’t seem to work out how to explain to her what to do 😅 I have tried, and she has copied what I’ve said, but it’s not worked 😂

Gloves. It takes ages to put gloves on young children. By the time they've got gloves on it's time to come in again. Buy mittens.

Oh god yes, gloves are a disaster. Especially when they won't keep their fingers separated for you or curl them into a fist. Mittens only please!!

Sleep training is often really distressing for a baby which is why parents don't want to do it and continue doing what is nicest/easiest at home (breastfeeding or holding to sleep) and leave it for nursery/childminder to sort.
But it just means that a baby who is already going through a big and upsetting change ALSO has to deal with being sleep trained by strangers.

It's not that childcare workers are lazy or judgemental, it's that it is horrible trying to get a baby to nap without being held or breastfed to sleep for the first time while they're also in a totally new environment and you're also trying to care for multiple other children.

Yes, some babies do adapt quickly but lots really struggle.
Childcare workers aren't magic, they don't just direct the baby to a sleep mat on day one and it's all sorted. It's hard.

Babies who are already in a sleep routine and can settle with a dummy, comforter, back stroke, bum pat or even on their own just find the transition to nursery a lot, lot easier.

The dreaded toddler in a pull-up, popped vest, tights, dungarees and lace-up high top converse

@caban came on to write this!

Recently I've noticed a massive lack of independence. Children expecting to be fed, standing there waiting for their shoes and coat to be put on, not wanting to walk.

Prolonged handovers. Coming back for a tenth cuddle and a kiss because the child is crying will just make it last longer. Honestly, they're fine as soon as the door closes.

Not enough nappies or spare clothes. Or turning up in shiny white shoes or white tracksuits and complaining when they are dirty.

Ringing the bell two minutes before opening and then arriving two minutes after closing. We're humans too.