So sick of children with SN being failed by the system

[elliejjtiny]

I have DC with SN aged between upper primary and college. With the primary aged children we talk at the school gates with other parents of dc who have SN and we share with each other the battle to get a diagnosis, ehcp, any kind of support. Then as the children get older I don't chat to the parents as much but I hear about the children whose parents were begging for support aged 5 now going off the rails. Yesterday my 12 year old told me that one of the boys in his year who went to his primary school has now been arrested for raping a girl. He's 12. I remember his mum desperately trying to get him an ehcp when he was 5. I know this is a generalisation but he's one of those children who needs vast amounts of attention and exercise because if they get bored they get into trouble.

My dc secondary school is really good with their learning support department. They regularly take children out to do farming, gardening, surfing etc. But there isn't the funding to take everyone who needs it and realistically, apart from the occasional extreme circumstances the children with ehcp get to do these things and the ones without an ehcp have to sink or swim. There is a school near me that has a farm on site and they do cross country every morning, milk the cows and basically wear the kids out so they haven't got the energy to get into trouble. But again, it's hard to get a place there. There are so many children who would really benefit from this kind of provision but can't get it.

I know it costs money but I'm sure it costs the state more when these children end up in prison than it would to have given them support when they were younger.

In a lot of ways we are lucky. Dh and I are both trained professionals in the field so we know a fair bit about SN. We can work out that our dc has autism and crack on with supporting them while we wait 3+ years for an official diagnosis. We have me as a SAHM and DH working SE from home at less than minimum wage so that we can be there when needed for the dc. We are broke and most of my clothes have holes in but it's worth it. A lot of parents don't have that option though.

I just despair at the whole system. These children and parents need practical support, appropriate education and prompt diagnosis.

Then you know what to do at the next election.

That said you cannot blame not getting an echp and link it with raping another child. The parents can do more, they can appeal, they can home school, they can move counties if they really think their child needs one, they can do more than just roll over and accept it.

But yes you're right. There's severe underfunding for SEN sectors, but this is what people voted for.

How did you vote? This is the consequence of over 13 years of austerity, like pretty much every other problem we have.

Err home schooling and moving counties is not an option for most. What a ridiculous suggestion. I found the EHCP process for my child exhausting and we have 3 degrees between us. I also work in education. Goodness know how other families battle through. And as for just appeal.🙄

The system is broken and yes it’s down to this government.

I either voted Labour or tactically voted lib dems because they were the ones most likely to get our conservative MP out.

I love the faith in our electoral system.

Maybe these posters live in swing seats?
I live in an area that has returned a tory mp for as long as its exsisted as a constituency. Its a very safe seat and all the other parties together dont add up to that close to the tory vote.

Spendonsend

Yep me too.

Kids with SEN are failed twice as they’re are more likely to struggle with mental health but that system is broken too.

I absolutely agree that the provision for SN is dire and patchy as hell.

But you seem to be saying a 12 year old raped someone because he wasn’t kept busy with farming and surfing? The parents bear no responsibility, it’s all because they couldn’t get this stuff funded?

Agree that SN children are being completely failed and the long run costs of that will far outweigh the savings. My son was refused an EHCP despite a full time TA at primary for first 3 years of secondary, then he was expected to get all 8s and 9s at GCSE and had friends. Then he got awarded one end of year 9 with almost no money in. School then declared can't meet needs during my stage 3 breast cancer treatment and LA failed to find another one - health bill I would guess is now at £300,000 and counting over last year picking up the impact of the lack of support and care from school / LA / cahms. Would have been far cheaper, around £14k a year to send him to the better school in the first place. And he is so broken by his school abandoning him during my chemo. And I've had 5 years of not being able to work to sort out this chaos, previously higher rate taxpayer when well supported by one TA.

I do agree that failed SEN support to rape is a bit of a stretch. However people who talk about a school to prison pipeline for children who are excluded and sen children are more likely to be excluded.

Just as ridiculous as blaming a child for raping another child because they didn't get to farm & go surfing?

Parents do need to take some kind of responsibility for these things.

Some of these children's parents were also failed and have diagnosed or undiagnosed SEN and have no or low capability to navigate the system.
In those cases society, the government and local authorities have failed their duty of care.

There is never an excuse for rape. Saying its because of luck of support and a ehcp, is beyond belief.

Otherwise, I agree, the system is broken.

It's not an excuse but rather part of an explanation, I can not see anyone excusing the horrendous act itself.

I know he didn't rape someone because he couldn't go surfing. It's the combination of lack of funding. My dc3 is one of those children who need constant supervision and extra exercise to make sure he stays out of trouble. It's exhausting. I couldn't do it if I was a single parent with no support. And some parents either don't know what to do to help their child or can't do it. Also don't forget that conditions such as autism and adhd, dyslexia etc can be genetic so many parents are dealing with multiple children with SN and/or have SN themselves. So the parents could have dyslexia and struggle with the dla/ehcp forms, or they have autism and struggle with having respite care or going to meetings. Or they could have adhd and have more children than they can cope with because they couldn't get organised with contraception. These are just generalisations and I'm sure there are some adults with SN who don't struggle. My son's TA has been incredibly kind and spent ages with me going through paperwork because she knows I struggle with it. Many parents would be too shy or embarrassed to ask for help and many professionals may not have the time.

Mine with Learning Disability etc is now 34 so have been through several governments and can’t say I’ve noticed a jot of difference with any of them . I remember thinking when David Cameron was PM that something might change as he had a son with disabilities. Nope.
I personally think it’s not enough money, not enough imagination, and people who clock off at 5pm and go home without any clue what it’s actually like for us.
Yours, jaded from Scotland !

Whilst I 100% agree SN children are failed by the system, I think it is ridiculous you are saying that lack of funding is to blame for a 12 year old raping someone. That is not an issue with school at all.

Provision for SEN is quite frankly shocking , I have 3 friends whose children should have started secondary school this term but they are at home because the council say they can't find a suitable school to meet their needs.

Please block this. I have no idea how to report but OP Frankly disgusts me or is he / her getting some vicarious thrill? You're disgusting

Agreed.

ridiculous to blame lack of farm experience for turning a child into a rapist.

And "wearing children out" is not a method of keeping them put of trouble.

As a teacher I agree that lack of funding for SEN is a huge problem. Our most vulnerable children are the ones who have been let down the most by the Tories.

Just how many farms do you think would be required to cater for all SEN children? Most farms are not playgrounds.

Jails are rammed full of people with dyslexia and ADHD. Some may well be bad people who would have ended up there anyway, but a lot are being failed.

I can't see the link between sen at 5 and criminal behaviour at 12. Sen stands for special educational needs, that is struggling ti access the mainstream curriculum. A child who goes on to commit such a serious crime at 12 has problems far deeper than can be addressed in school, it's hardly struggling to sit still in class or needing 1:1 support to learn to read is it! I think we've lost sight of the need to parent out children and seek social services support if needed, teachers are for education not crime prevention