Just hoping someone is up

[Upatthiahour]

Ds (nearly 3) has been up since 4. His baby sister was awake at 130, so I’ve had maybe 4 hours sleep. I’m so fed up. I really think if I’d known how awful toddlers are I wouldn’t have had children at all

I had 2 under 2 and no dad to help my son was an early baby who then developed bronchiolitis and I'd gotten into the habit of me sitting bolt up right on the sofa with him asleep on me so he could breathe easier from this he'd scream if I wasn't holding him 24 7 😖sleep was a thing of the past I felt physically ill from exhaustion. When he turned 2 he went to nursery, yes he'd cry but soon become used to it and it gave him more independence at home. He's just turned 10 now and my daughter 11 and they're both more interested in their friends than me! It DOES get easier xx

He does go to nursery but I’ve got the other one at home so I won’t get any downtime. And even if I didn’t I’d be at work when he’s at nursery! Ah what a joy, have kids they said …

@HelloDaisy i am not upset but it’s frustrating repeating yourself over and over when you’ve been up most of the night.

@HelloItsMeHowAreYou your comment made me laugh! the amount of 'advice' I get with my daughter's sleep! I want to say F off!

My 16 month old has probably slept through less times than I have fingers. Last night I was up at 11, then 2 and he never got back to sleep for an hour. Then up again at 5.30 to start the day. He doesn’t cry either, he screams at the top of his voice. DD is 3 and just started preschool so I can’t risk him waking her so have do whatever I can to keep him quiet, but he still cries for hours.

This is every fucking night. I am dead. I genuinely don’t know how to sleep more than 3 hours at a time anymore.

Ontop of that, I am about to murder our dog as she keeps jumping on our bed at night waking me up even more. Can’t leave her downstairs as she whines and bites the stairgate if it’s closed. If we leave it open, she goes into my DD’s room and wakes her up as she needs the door open.

The feeling of prolonged, pure, utter exhaustion is just torture. I find myself wishing the days away.

And if another person tells me older kids, that fucking sleep, are harder, im going to scream.

Dc1 didn’t sleep through until nearly 2 years old, and rarely napped during the day. She’d scream until she was sick.
DS was the complete opposite thankfully.
i remember scrubbing the kitchen floor at 4am just to do something. DH was utterly useless, had very little to do with the children as babies.
I remember that bone-aching exhaustion, feeling sick because I was so tired.
It does get better but that’s little consolation at the moment I know.

Oh OP I'm sorry, it's utterly souk destroying having tiddlers that don't sleep. None of mine napped during the day but would my boys sleep at night? Would they fuck. Luckily mine are older now and while the 14 year old still doesn't sleep through the night he no longer bugs the shit out of me with it. He has no additional needs he's just a shit sleeper and always has been. Whereas I LOVE my sleep. I could nap all day given half a chance. DS1? Not a chance. He's up at 5am every day, goes to bed at 11pm and is usually up for a while around 2am. And although I hear him I've gotten used to drowning him out and going back to sleep. I wish you all the luck in the world for a better night tonight

Hi, sending sympathy- neither of mine slept at night for the first year and the older one didn’t sleep during the day either - just five minute catnaps and only when being held, followed by a return to screaming. The worst thing for me was not being believed/listened to and being told he must be sleeping more than we thought, (he really wasn’t!)

Unless you have experienced that level of exhaustion you just don’t get it. Me and DH were quite literally losing our minds - we still talk about it now many many years later.

I did find that buying a baby/toddler sleeping bag helped my youngest to sleep through eventually, (didn’t discover them in time to use with the oldest, unfortunately).

Have you seen a speech therapist? If he can't talk much maybe that's the cause of all the screaming. Does he go to nursery? Or at home with you?

Every age has it challenges. Mine are in their 20’s now. The issues are there but just different. We live in arse end of nowhere. Dh or I often pick up at 2/3am later sometimes if they can’t get an Uber home.

Sorry I asked about nursery again x
I've only had one. But I think putting them in nursery can help. The sleep was much better from 4.
I kept mine in a sleep bag for years. Till 4.
Forgot that!

Sympathies, I remember those early starts and constantly feeling knackered and fed up. It does get better (the challenge is now getting them out of bed in the morning) - but I know that's no consolation at all when you're in the middle of it.

i think it’s fairly obvious that OP isn’t looking for advice here, just a place to rant. Anyone with a toddler who doesn’t sleep has likely already tried everything and just needs a place to decompress. Today is a particularly bad day here in my house, we need to do some sort of reset and honestly I’m considering that kitchen dance party idea

Good luck OP. The sun is shining here, hope you have got the little ones out for some fresh air and that they will give you a break after lunch.

Sympathies. It’s grim. I know you don’t really want advice but (yeah, I’m trying to not be that person, sorry) I’ve been there with a 4am riser every bloody day. The things that eventually helped were a magnesium supplement and similar to a weighted blanket (just a heavy blanket on their legs). It could just be coincidence that these things helped but might be worth a try.