Im struggling with kids not eating in my job

[Middaysupervisory]

I've been in my new role as a dinner lady for 2 weeks now and something I'm struggling with -is kids just not eating. Some of them hardly touch their hot lunches and again the same for the ones who bring pack ups some eat them well some don't.
Were not allowed to force a child to eat but to encourage their eating.

I have children my self who have a very particular diet so I do understand it but when your actually there and seeing them not eat it really pulls on your heart I don't know what to do.

It's great that school meals have got healthier and standards are higher, but the result of that is going to be a large number of children who are much less willing to eat the food than if the school was serving up bland "beige" or freezer food. Because as far as they're concerned, the food isn't 'safe' to them.

Yes, this very much. Whatever children 'should' eat, the fact is that many of them won't eat healthy foods. So which is better for them: unhealthy food that they will eat or healthy food that they refuse?

I also think those plastic trays they serve the food directly on to don't help either. I know they're practical, safer from breaking and help to separate different foods for children for whom that's an issue; but I'm sure they don't get given food slopped straight on to a tray at home - so that's another factor that marks it out as different for the 'but she eats those foods at home' wonderers.

What exactly is the problem? If they want it, they’ll eat it. If they don’t, they don’t. How much they eat and what they want to eat has to be THEIR choice. It cannot be forced.

I also think some people are being unfair to OP. I don't get any impression that she's wanting to dictate or force the children - just sad to see them going away hungry - and I do believe that many of them are still hungry, and they have various reasons for not eating the food apart from 'not being hungry'.

Most of them would happily eat a sugary snack instead, so they are hungry.

I know lunchtime isn't a lesson as such, but if you were there to teach/help children learn maths and they left after every lesson without having learned anything, you would be upset too.

It's great that school meals have got healthier and standards are higher, but the result of that is going to be a large number of children who are much less willing to eat the food than if the school was serving up bland "beige" or freezer food. Because as far as they're concerned, the food isn't 'safe' to them.

very much shitty standards and freezer food still here. Chicago town pizza with chips, fish fingers, sausages etc always with some sort of frozen potato. Curry or roast dinner once a fortnight.

Oh rubbish.

Most people eat sugary snacks because they like them, not because they're hungry.

How many times have you thought, "I'm famished, I think I'll reach for a packet of Fruit Pastilles"? 🙄

Even dd who has a huge appetite and varied tastes doesn't eat a huge amount at school lunch. For a start it's served pretty early, they've already had breakfast, and a snack - at the school I work at add in school toast too as all dc get that. They are by this point not especially hungry and keen to get out and play. The occasional child has an inadequate lunch so we get them something extra so that's solved. No need to lose sleep over dc with good meals in front of them simply not being hungry enough to eat it

Oh rubbish.

Most people eat sugary snacks because they like them, not because they'rehungry.

No, of course you don't eat sugary snacks to satiate your hunger, but if you're genuinely completely full up (as children often claim to be when they are not), you probably couldn't manage them - much less eagerly grab and wolf them down when offered them.

I can’t see the issue , if they don’t want to eat then that’s their right . School days are pretty short , assuming they’ve had breakfast they will be fine not eating much at lunchtime . Mine had to have school dinners ( packed lunch not allowed) and they never ate much ( picky eaters) so I used to take a substantial snack for the way home .

My DS is exactly like that. You could put his favourite food in front of him and if he doesn't want to eat, he won't. Doesn't matter it's a biscuit or a plate of pasta cheese. Kids, especially quite young kids, are pretty good at eating intuitively.

If somebody could work out a way of presenting healthy food in a way that children would go crazy over, they would become a billionaire.

Like the old chestnut about children never having to be taught to say No, most of them do seem to have a remarkable innate way of deliberately favouring bad things - even grim-tasting bad foods over nice-tasting healthy foods.

What makes me sad is the waste of all the uneaten food! Kids having a few mouthfuls and then the rest going straight in the bin. Surprised that 3yos are giving the same portion as the 11yos. Though I'm not surprised they are hardly eating them as they really don't like appetising!

I do however ask the children to try and have a few more bites if they've barely eaten and wait a few minutes before I take the plate, we have to wait until all the year group has finished before we leave the hall.

I wonder if it would help if you talked to your supervisor, manager, or a colleague who was a bit more experienced. I've noticed a few threads which you've started where you've expressed concerns about aspects of your job, and I don't think anyone on Mumsnet is going to be able to reassure you or help you as much as a real life colleague might!
It sounds like a stressful job but I'm sure you'll get into the swing of it soon and you'll be wonderful why you ever worried about getting the kids to eat- it's not part of the role as far as I am aware!

What makes me sad is the waste of all the uneaten food! Kids having a few mouthfuls and then the rest going straight in the bin.

Yes, same here - all the effort that's gone into preparing it is wasted, as is all of the perfectly good food itself.

Desperate parents might still plead with their kids about how starving children in very poor countries would love that food, but it isn't untrue, is it?

If a child turns their nose up at a book, game or toy without even looking at it, at least you can still pass it on to another child, who will like it. Cooked/prepared food, not so much.

Just make sure there's something available that most children will eat eg plain pasta.

My DS just didn't like sandwiches, or bland school dinners (so a more bland option as a backup did not help!). He made up for it at home but ate little at school until I started sending him with a flask of chilli or curry instead. He's just a sensory seeker with food.

Just make sure there's something available that most children will eat eg plain pasta.

But then, even if you do that, what happens if the kids who would have eaten the healthier options, also reject the main menu when they see that they could just have stodgy carbs instead?

“What makes me sad is the waste of all the uneaten food! Kids having a few mouthfuls and then the rest going straight in the bin.”

what would you do to solve that problem/stop you feeling sad about it?

Oh ok, just starve half the school so that a few of the kids eat some vegetables. Good plan.

And if a child wants to bring chilli flakes that may mean they actually eat the food, don't confiscate them!

Oh ok, just starve half the school so that a few of the kids eat some vegetables. Good plan.

Where did I say not to offer pasta? All I meant was that, by having a halfway-house alternative for the kids who won't eat anything else, you also have to bear in mind the side-effect of it discouraging those without problems to eat less healthily.

Why not just give every child a chocolate orange for their lunch - then nigh on 100% of them will eat it up without quibble? There has to be a balance between encouraging healthy eating/discouraging unhealthy eating and actually getting the kids to eat.

Funny, as several people on here have said leave it to the kids to know if they're hungry or not, and they will if they want to.

I've been a dinner lady for years and some kids will hardly eat anything because they wany to go out and play and some just have small appetites.
Don't let it worry you too much.

I would focus on the other aspects of your job, I think gentle encouragement to eat and then encouraging good table manners, imaginative play in the playground, kindness, tolerance, showing an interest in their day. All these to me are as important as the actual eating bit.

I'd relax the rules on the food having to be healthy with no added salt/ sugar- which has resulted in bland and tasteless food. I think at the moment with the food poverty situation - getting children fed is more important than what is fed- obviously not going back to turkey twizzlers etc.

I'd give appropriate portions for the different aged children not all the same and id supervise children more rather than letting them Chuck it all in the bin!

Potentially id scrap free school dinners and replace with free breakfasts - easier to suit children needs and if children are starving from food poverty having a breakfast is better than them having to wait until lunch to be fed.

There's so much food waste in hot school meals. Almost all of it goes in the bin. I think the portions should be much, much smaller with seconds and thirds available to any child who actually wants them. Most kids just want to go and play.

my daughter has just gone in to year 6 and always brings home most of her lunch . i wouldn't stress about it .