How best to deal with a passive aggressive anonymous note.

[WouldYouLikeYourMuffinButtered]

My daughter is a new driver and the only one in our family who can drive. She needs her car to get to work as she works very unsociable hours. We rent our house and do not have access to the garage as it is rented out separately but all of our neighbours have a garage to use in the compound, however everyone of them prefers on street parking for convenience and it's a bit of a free for all.
Today an anonymous typed note was left on my daughter's windscreen telling her to 'leave space for other residents'. This partly because she does leave a bit extra space in front of her, because she doesn't have the confidence or skills yet to get out of tight spaces and is worried about clipping another car. None of this scenario is anything which couldn't be sorted by having a civil conversation, but I am really pissed off about it all.. she has nowhere else to park but neither do we need a neighbour feud. I'm interested in other driver's viewpoint.

Just tell her to not leave so much space in front. It can be annoying when you are unable to park because someone is taking up 1.5 cars worth of space.
A note wasn’t the best way to go about it but, these days there are so many people who would fly off the handle if you dared to have a polite chat about an issue, I can understand why. The end result or either a note or a conversation would surely be the same if it was going to be ‘sorted’?

The note writer is extremely lame. I would not respond in any way!

Is she blocking another parking space with her extra room? If so she needs to stop and the note was fine.

I had this once. And I hadn’t left lots of space. Cars had come and since I parked. So the spacing had changed. Weird note to write.

How could you possibly respond?

Just make sure she parks properly in future. Being a new driver doesn't give you the right to take up extra space that inconveniences other people

Just park properly she’s gonna have to learn sometime

beatboy I kind of get the annoyance with the extra space, but its due to her lack of driving experience and there is literally no one in the family to teach her...but it's on street parking. As a non driver it's good to hear another perspective though, thanks

She needs to book a lesson with a professional instructor and spend the whole lesson learning to park. It will be money well spent.

Ignore the note and have DD take lessons on how to reverse park. Once she has faith that she can fit into a space she will be able to do a 1 or a 100 point turn to get out of a tight space.

She takes up about half a metre more than most and other cars come and so the surrounding space fluctuates.

She doesn't need to be taught she needs to practice! She knows how to park.

With respect, your daughters lack of experience is not a problem for your neighbours to deal with. I suggest a brush up lesson with an instructor to deal with the actual issue, which is your DD is not able to confidently manoeuvre her car

When my DC passed their test, we had already booked an extra lesson to go straight on the M25 and learn how to deal with it. There are lots of things that an extra lesson or 2 can help with.

Thanks, I really appreciate the various points of view.

A PA note leaver once let me know I hadn't left enough room between cars, so what can you do?

Another couple of driving lessons then.

I mean if the note is anonymous (don't think it was PA?), then there's not much she can do except learn to park.

I would tell her just to ignore it, if anyone has the actual balls to say anything to her then she can explain that she's a new driver and doesn't have the confidence to park closer and unlike all the other houses she doesn't have a garage that she could park in. They probably won't though seeing as they didn't even put a name or house number on the note.

There's no law to say how much space you have to leave between cars so if the neighbours don't like it they can just park in their frigging garages, lazy bastards.

If she's passed her test it's just confidence really, and she needs to back herself to be able to judge it. leaving too much space is annoying as fuck though.

The note is OK I think, not aggressive from what you say. I think your DD needs to park a bit tighter if the road is busy, really.

This is my initial reaction. But it's interesting to hear how others feel about it. On street parking seems a bit of a contentious issue.

I appreciate the different points though, thanks

I'm guessing that she has a relatively small car, so she won't be taking up any more room than if she had a bigger car. The note-writer is just an arsehole.

It might be worth suggesting she puts 'P' plates on the car though, which would be an indication to other residents that she is a recently-qualified driver and has not yet gained the experience to twiddle a car on a sixpence to get in and out of tight spaces.

Ignoring it and carrying on as you are is the best course of action I think. Don’t rush your DD into parking in a smaller space than she is comfortable to get out of - that’s the fastest way to end up with a bump to hers and a neighbours car. If someone has an issue with it they can approach directly and you can explain in person.

You could call your neighbours bastards and get all antsy or you could encourage your DD to practise parking and get a further lesson on reverse parking as per pp which will really help to improve her confidence. I wouldn’t go to someone’s door to have this conversation unless I knew them well enough to know it would be a productive and polite conversation - too many horror stories about people who have politely requested things of the wrong people.

I don't see what the difference between renting and owning has to do with anything. On street parking is fair game and your neighbour has no more right to the street than anyone else.

That all said, your daughter has to get used to the realities of parking if only to keep a bit of peace.