Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Child-safe in minutes.

Meet the Other Phone.
Child-safe in minutes.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Chat

Join the discussion and chat with other Mumsnetters about everyday life, relationships and parenting.

Original poster

Changing for PE year 4

52 replies

HowAboutTheLittleSpoon · 04/09/2023 16:27

DD has started year 4 today, age 8. Over the summer I've noticed she's started puberty, everything but periods. Obviously she's quite young, but also quite a shy, reserved child and often talks about a group of "silly boys" in her class (same class as last year). At her school they still change together in the classroom, I've approached her teacher this afternoon to see about the possibility of the girls and boys splitting up to change/wearing their kit to school on PE days but she says no to both.

Can I ask what your children's schools do around a similar age please?

OP posts:
DustyLee123 · 04/09/2023 16:28

I asked this and was told they only separate in yr 6.

markusdam · 04/09/2023 16:29

We have stuck to wearing pe kits for pe days so no changing

SliceOfCakeCupOfTea · 04/09/2023 16:31

Ours have set days where they wear PE kits all day now, but even when they didn't they used to separate girls and boys from reception onwards.

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about these subjects:

8 year olds General education Primary education
Tarantella6 · 04/09/2023 16:31

My two change in the classroom but they always wear cycling shorts under their skirts anyway. On PE days they only have to change their top. They've got crop tops to wear under their polo shirts if they want, they rarely do though.

Needmorelego · 04/09/2023 16:31

At my daughter's Primary they starting separate changing in Year 4. Apparently the children asked themselves ("Miss can we change in the toilets") and the teacher realised the children (well the girls) wanted it.
Has your daughter actually spoken to the teacher?

BoohooWoohoo · 04/09/2023 16:32

My kids went to a 2 form entry and both classes had PE at the same time so they could have one classroom with boys and the other with girls.

Leovaldie · 04/09/2023 16:32

They only seperate them in y6 in our school.

Needmorelego · 04/09/2023 16:35

@HowAboutTheLittleSpoon if the school says no then send her in wearing PE kit on the day. What are they gonna do? They can't send 8 year olds home to change.

Carlessly · 04/09/2023 16:48

Ours always used the changing rooms straight from Yr1.

AmyandPhilipfan · 04/09/2023 16:51

If she wears a vest and knickers under her school uniform then surely there's nothing for anyone to see when she's getting changed anyway? That's similar to wearing a swimming costume.

I can remember occasionally asking to change in the toilets when I was in Year 6 and quite well developed, but that was only on days I'd forgotten to put a vest/crop top on. Pull shorts up under the skirt then take skirt off. PE top over the head then unbutton blouse (I know most wear polo shirt but I'm sure she could wear a blouse if easier on PE days) and remove then quickly pull t shirt down.

BackToOklahoma · 04/09/2023 16:54

When my kids were at primary, they got changed separately from year 4 onwards.

If your daughter is uncomfortable, keep pushing for separate changing or for her to get changed in the toilets if she would feel ok with that.

The other option is cycling shorts and vest/t-shirt under her uniform and then just take uniform off and put her pe kit on top of those so she’s always covered up.

Don’t let it go. It’s important your daughter is comfortable. This sort of thing puts kids, especially girls off sport.

DiddlyDonut · 04/09/2023 16:54

Needmorelego · 04/09/2023 16:35

@HowAboutTheLittleSpoon if the school says no then send her in wearing PE kit on the day. What are they gonna do? They can't send 8 year olds home to change.

My thoughts exactly.

I wouldn't care if the teacher says 'no' here, your child and her comfort/privacy trumps teacher on this.

whosaidtha · 04/09/2023 16:55

Put a vest on. Problem solved.
There probably aren't enough staff to supervise the children getting changed separately or a space for all the girls to change together.

Original poster
HowAboutTheLittleSpoon · 04/09/2023 16:55

Ours separate in year 5, but only since last year when others complained. It used to be year 6 but it seems unfair for the children who start puberty early. Especially if they split them in year 5 for the same reason.

No, DD hasn't spoken to the teacher as it's only day 1 and she's not the best at asking for things for herself. Definitely something to work on though, although the teacher is known for being quite strict.

I asked about wearing their kits for the day but she said no as she does PE lessons in the afternoon and she can't have them wearing their kits all day.

I am thinking of sending her in with PE shorts/top under her school clothes after this week when the weather cools down

OP posts:
MrsFionaCharming · 04/09/2023 16:56

I’d keep pushing it. I’d be very unimpressed if I was told to get changed in front of my male colleagues, even if I had a vest on underneath. Girls deserve privacy and dignity as soon as they ask for it.

Original poster
HowAboutTheLittleSpoon · 04/09/2023 16:57

I understand there probably aren't the staff to supervise separate groups, but I don't understand why it's a big deal if they wear their kits all day

OP posts:
sunshineandshowers40 · 04/09/2023 16:58

It used to be separate changing for Y5/Y6, then after Covid they all wore PE kits to school on PE days, now all of KS2 separate to change after complaints/queries from parents. It's not that difficult for kids manage, boys in one classroom, girls in another

Orbitold · 04/09/2023 17:01

MrsFionaCharming · 04/09/2023 16:56

I’d keep pushing it. I’d be very unimpressed if I was told to get changed in front of my male colleagues, even if I had a vest on underneath. Girls deserve privacy and dignity as soon as they ask for it.

This

Original poster
HowAboutTheLittleSpoon · 04/09/2023 17:01

MrsFionaCharming · 04/09/2023 16:56

I’d keep pushing it. I’d be very unimpressed if I was told to get changed in front of my male colleagues, even if I had a vest on underneath. Girls deserve privacy and dignity as soon as they ask for it.

This kind of sums up my feelings too, and not even (just) because she's a girl. I doubt DH would be impressed at getting changed with female colleagues either! And I feel like I shouldn't put her in a situation I would be unhappy to do myself, just because she's a child. I just wanted to get an idea of how other schools handle it and if I was being unreasonable to expect a change (but I'm avoiding aibu!)

OP posts:
MintJulia · 04/09/2023 17:01

Mine changed in the class room right the way through primary. Obviously they keep their pants on and just change shorts and t-shirts. And were supervised. It wasn't a problem.

ChaToilLeam · 04/09/2023 17:02

If your DD is showing signs of puberty, then it is time for her to have privacy if she wants it. I was an early developer, there wasn’t separate changing at primary (though in Y6/7 we just headed for the toilets) and it put me right off PE, which I was never that keen on anyway.

SliceOfCakeCupOfTea · 04/09/2023 17:06

MintJulia · 04/09/2023 17:01

Mine changed in the class room right the way through primary. Obviously they keep their pants on and just change shorts and t-shirts. And were supervised. It wasn't a problem.

But it is a problem for OPs daughter.

mogtheexcellent · 04/09/2023 17:06

My daughter changes under her desk. Its not ideal. I did the same at her age and my primary had huge changing rooms that only the top year used which seemed a waste of space.

Fortunately they have seperate changing for the swimming pool but thats only used in summer term

BlueThursday · 04/09/2023 17:12

Mine is in P5 so think equivalent to Y4 and the school requests kids come to school in a sort of PE kit eg polo or white T-shirt with either joggers, leggings or shorts that must be dark

the school has it from P1 and says it’s such a time saver not having the pupils arse about changing

BlueThursday · 04/09/2023 17:13

BlueThursday · 04/09/2023 17:12

Mine is in P5 so think equivalent to Y4 and the school requests kids come to school in a sort of PE kit eg polo or white T-shirt with either joggers, leggings or shorts that must be dark

the school has it from P1 and says it’s such a time saver not having the pupils arse about changing

My point is could it be suggested to the school as a time saver?