What's the worst gift you e ever had?

[kwetu]

I've got a couple of examples, for our 20th wedding anniversary my husband bought me a toilet brush (admittedly it was one that I'd been seeking for a while, but really!).
Many years ago I was in hospital (gallstones) and my get well gift was a massive book of 1001 recipe ideas, I tried not to take offence but once again....really?
Would love to hear of anyone else's gift fails.
Lighthearted.

Loads.

A CD holder when I was a teen, the giver asked my mother if I would like one, she told them I would, then she told me what I was getting so I could feign, "Oh wonderful, just what I wanted".

I didn't own a CD or CD player (early 80s).

She had form for this. When I was about 7 or 8 I really wanted a locket for Xmas, but I wanted one I could open.

So we went shopping, I got to pick a lovely silver oval locket but I knew I wouldn't get it until Christmas.

A few days later my mum was talking to a neighbour and neighbour asked about me and my brother and then got out a silver heart shaped locket and asked my mother would I like it.

So my mother said yes, returned MY locket to the shop and I got a second hand heat shaped locket (I never liked love hearts) that I could not open.

When I was 17 driving lessons that I didn't want. My brother had wanted them for his birthday so I had to have them. I was in a VI form I hated and now I was being forced to learn something I wasn't interested in when I could have been home.

I have arthritis in every joint in my body, it also affects my skin and sometimes my eyes. I find it difficult to hold books so I use a Kindle. I used to love doing arts and crafts but I can't do much now.

Over the years my brother has bought me:

A yukelele
An adult colouring book and pencils
Several books - which I then return to Amazon and buy a book for my kindle
Things with cats. Mugs, ornament, pictures, a vile orange cushion. I like cats, but I like actual cats.
A sewing kit to make a soft toy - I don't like soft toys
A soft toy blackbird that made a blackbird noise
A book of jokes, bad ones, he wrote in the cover so I couldn't return it.

I was diagnosed as diabetic last year so I expect the next thing will be chocolate.

Valentine gift 2 weeks after giving birth to DS, a rain coat, that was too small. Practical yes but of all the things he could have got me to make my ravaged hormonal body feel loved a rain coat wasn't one of them !!

Earrings for pierced ears and size 14 pack of M&S plain knickers.

I don't have pierced ears and at the time I was a size 10.

@becarefulofyourheart piggyback to a damp carpet! Plus your db sounds amazing 😊

Any cheap shite my tightwad ds’s club together to give me when I always buy them individual gifts. Mind you, I have a little competition with myself every year to spend as little as humanly possible.

My first serious boyfriend bought me an alarm clock for my birthday. Mainly because he didn’t like the sound of my phone alarm. Was upset about it at the time.
however, 19 years on I still use it! It projects the time onto the ceiling which I LOVE!

Tiny size 8 clothes from dh for my birthday, 3 days after giving birth to ds1. I had been a size 10/12 before pregnancy.

Spa vouchers. Not my thing at all. I gave them away.

A used candle from.MIL

They're quite handy for cleaning up small places around the home too!

A friend once inexplicably bought me a furby - sort of demonic looking toys that were popular in the 90s. I'd never shown any interest in furbies or any kind of stuffed toy so it seemed like an odd choice. --

The one she bought malfunctioned and the battery slider/holder wouldn't open so I had to wait until the batteries slowly died over a period of weeks before it would shut up. --

I would be sitting in my room and all
of a sudden it'd sigh, blink its eyes and let out a slow menacing whine, frightening the crap out of me. In the end, I put it under a pile of towels in the airing cupboard so I didn't have to listen to its demonic death wheezes.

Saucepans. All in big, thrilling-looking boxes. That was a bad Christmas.
A giftbag full of hair and crumbs, that had used hand cream in it.
A mug with a drawing of York Minster on it, somewhere neither I nor the giver had been at the time.
A tiny plastic succulent.
A carrier bag full of fabric pieces.
Nothing. For a major event.

Collapsible bucket.

Oh I remember those . I was given a necklace the insect was as big as my face I totally forgot about it, I think my Aunty gave it to me for Christmas!

Hahah, I laughed so hard at this!

I must be weird but I've received quite a few of the items mentioned here and LOVED them! I adore my knives and saucepans, and the posh toilet brush my Mum bought me as an engagement present disguised as a bottle of champagne!

Worst was a bottle of expensive perfume (I regifted, I hate perfume) - only a bad present because it symbolised the person's lack of thought. Also ex-MIL have me one DVD from a box set. It wasn't a series I knew so to jump straight in at episode 11 made no sense.

My now ex bought some expensive perfume for his secretary when he flew abroad on business and got me a penny stamped in one of those tourist penny atamps. He made a really big deal about having got me something before he'd got home. I was really upset and he didn't understand why, because "you don't like perfume!"

A pamper set (body creams) and sleeping mist to help me sleep.

This was after having a baby who didn’t let me sleep and I was recovering from a horrendous emergency c section. My mother clearly didn’t get it.

I love these threads, I don't particularly have any awful gifts to add, that I remember at least.

What always stands out to me is older relatives seem to have this obsession with buying underwear, what is that about? It's never appropriate. And especially teen/pre-teen girls do not want to open knickers or training bras from Granny or Aunt Fanny in front of the rest of the family.

A gel filled wonderbra. I was 19yo, admittedly had no boobs, but it never bothered me. I was completely accepting about how I looked in general. Until I got the gel bra (which was awful to wear, the gel was cold!) and stared to become really self-conscious about my chest.

A grey thong 2 sizes too small from Sainsburys from my boyf nan. She also gave me a Santa mug....... in July. She was a lovely lady so I didn't mind at all and found it funny. My MIL buys me a hat & scarf set every Christmas, I could open a shop, often I take them to the charity shop. This year she bought me a turquoise set - totally not my colour, never worn anything turquoise before.

My FIL did not give us a wedding present because he said he had spent too much on a gift 'the first time around' - aka when DH married his ex.

That said, he then proceeded to give me £500 cash every Christmas with the strict instructions I had to spend it on something both frivolous and just for me.

I loved my FIL. He was a difficult man but we got along famously. ❤

Not me but DD1 when she was 7 (so v excited by presents) - massive wrapped box from grandparents. What exciting toy could it be? No - it's a summer tog duvet!!!! Totally fine to buy it for her but why did they wrap it? She was marvellously polite & thanked them so nicely we got some (more) Lego for not losing it with them.

They are v generous but totally random so you know never to get your hopes up. I got a gorgeous & expensive antique for my 40th whilst my poor sister got a set of plates for her 40th. For my 50th I got a pair of boots that were supposed to be for Xmas but hadn't arrived in time.

Hot Chocolate gift set with mugs and marshmallow etc
Choc sachets all well out of date

My BIL has form for giving odd gifts, but his best was a child's Finding Nemo stationery kit - themed ruler, rubber, pencils etc. I was 35. Apparently he thought I'd find it useful for work.

Hairy bikers weight loss cook book 😂I was a size 6 at the time and was very confused when I opened it on Christmas morning.

My MIL gave me a used bar of coal tar soap and a flannel one Christmas and the following Christmas a bar of cheap unwrapped soap and another flannel.
No, she wasn’t confused or demented, she just made it abundantly clear at every possible opportunity that she didn’t like me (even calling me by dh’s ex fiancée’s name on occasions.
An absolute cow.

A Canadian flag sticker about 2 inches by 3. It was from my first serious boyfriends mum and dad who went there on holiday. His brothers girlfriend, newer than me, received a jacket!