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Original poster

How to describe someone. Is there a term?

54 replies

okiedokie1 · 09/08/2023 17:27

Occasionally in life I come up alongside a type of character I struggle to be around. If I try to describe the reasons I don't like being around them to my dh it sounds so wishy washy as there is nothing that sounds dramatically difficult. I was wondering if there was a term that describes this type of character. Like CF or narcissist or toxic or clingy. I can't think of a describer that feels accurate.
Overly in your face
Not able to sense that you don't want to talk. Just keeps on invading space until I just want to tell her to back off.
Never stops talking
Asks too many questions
Discusses things they suffer with in minute detail and shows you ...rashes, boils, random yucky body things
When it's time for them to leave they don't go. They sort of cling on and just keep in finding things to talk about
Overly keen
Overly friendly
Overly everything
When I know they are going to be somewhere I desperately don't want to go.
If I had to sit next to them at a dinner o would have to feign illness and leave.
Gives me the ick

It's not just me who feels this way. I haven't actually spoken to anyone but I can see people backing away or finding excuses to not be around her

But she's not nasty. She tried to be nice. I don't know what it is. Please help me understand what is repelling me

OP posts:
nameitagain · 09/08/2023 19:08

It's constant questions then bombarding you with facts then wandering off when things are busy to talk at random people instead of getting stuff done and then pulling off her socks to show me her toe fungus then leaning too close to look at what I'm eating.....just too much.

Nevermay · 09/08/2023 19:08

larger -than-life?

oversharer?

AmbleInAnnBoleyn · 09/08/2023 19:09

I would say needy.

FatArse123 · 09/08/2023 19:11

Another vote for 'Needy'. I feel sorry for her, but I would probably find myself avoiding her as well. Sad really.

mainbrochus · 09/08/2023 19:12

My SIL?

MissPerfekt · 09/08/2023 19:12

Overbearing

SlowerMovingVehicle · 09/08/2023 19:13

Because they have nothing to offer, nothing at all. They just take: time, attention. They are attention addicts. Being around addicts is stressful!

travelogue · 09/08/2023 19:17

Energy vampire / draining / exhausting / intense / suffocating - these are words that spring to my mind!

calmcoco · 09/08/2023 19:18

I would say 'full on' or intense.

I like 'she's a lot'.

Lig · 09/08/2023 19:19

It sounds like she lacks basic social awareness. She’s probably not very perceptive & struggles to read people. Oversharing might be her way of trying to bond/break the ice

She probably likes some of the attention too.

nameitagain · 09/08/2023 19:30

It's become difficult as she has started attending a group thing that relies on volunteers to help out. Every time someone can't do their slot, she jumps in to do it. This sounds nice. Like she's helping but it means she is now there all the time and it's making the place weird and awkward. The minute someone messages in to say they can't do their slot she's straight there 'I'll do it!!!!' Daily. Yes sage might be lonely. But it's seriously creeping me out

SkinnyMalinkyLankyLegs · 09/08/2023 19:31

Overbearing?

Ginola2345 · 09/08/2023 19:52

needy lonely trying to hard

Fudgeandcaramel · 09/08/2023 19:56

Intrusive.

uncomfortablydumb53 · 09/08/2023 23:44

Intense

wellingtonsandwaffles · 10/08/2023 00:03

Overbearing
intense
bulldozer

WanderingWitches · 10/08/2023 00:04

nameitagain · 09/08/2023 19:08

It's constant questions then bombarding you with facts then wandering off when things are busy to talk at random people instead of getting stuff done and then pulling off her socks to show me her toe fungus then leaning too close to look at what I'm eating.....just too much.

Name change fail?

Trinity69 · 10/08/2023 00:09

I know someone like this. I refer to her as too much or just not my person. She’s lovely, kind, friendly, but to me, she’s just too much.

WhereshallIwander · 10/08/2023 00:10

Histrionic?

I was looking for a word to describe my mother and found out about histrionic personality disorder. 😁

OriginalUsername2 · 10/08/2023 00:41

I know OP said not autism, but look up “go find less”. This is a phrase by autistic girls who have always been called “too much”.

pacifictime · 10/08/2023 00:44

I have a friend like this. The constant offering to help thing. It's a lot

AlmostTotallyFake · 10/08/2023 06:22

I worked with someone like this.
On paper she had it all, partner, amazing house, great social opportunities and plenty of money.
She just didn't have any friends. At all. Not one single person she had clicked with at 48 years old.
She latched on to me for a while (I was mid twenties at the time) and it was like she had a vacuum inside her, she would have sucked all of the energy from me if I had given her the chance, I had to change my working hours slightly to shake her off in the end but she was definitely overbearing and intense.

jabberwokky · 10/08/2023 06:32

I actually want to know if there is a word for this sort of character. I haven't gossiped about them to anyone. I simply feel uncomfortable around them and so do others and I want a word to describe the character type. Not sure why you are so hostile.

@okiedokie1 Think about what you are saying. You want a word to describe a 'character type' - you want to put her in a box and give her a label. She's a human and she's complex, just like you. She's not a 'character type', she's a person.

There is a reason why she is the way she is, why she is annoying and overly intense and all the things you describe. It does sound like hard work and I sympathise, but giving her a label is not going to help you to empathise and understand her any better, is it? It's just going to reinforce your negative view of her.

The best way to get over negative feelings about people is to try and understand where they are coming from and why they are the way they are.

PurBal · 10/08/2023 06:34

Overbearing?

NashvilleQueen · 10/08/2023 06:34

Pain in the arse

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