What does your 11 yr old ds enjoy doing at home that doesn’t involve a screen?

[Tacocatgoatcheesepizza]

We are struggling to find anything that interests ds to do at home that isn’t screen based - either gaming or watching tv.

He enjoys activities out of the house, tennis, bowling, cinema, park etc but at home nothing. He is also not particularly interested in seeing his friends out of school although will happily see my friends children.

He struggles with fine motor skills anyway but things like lego are no longer of interest to him. He does read and is an excellent reader but usually saves that for bedtime. He will play the odd board game (and win) and occasionally do some baking, but I’d also like him to have something that he does on his own!! I have tried directing him towards things like coding and stop motion but also not interested. He is not at all sporty except for racket games and we do tennis, table tennis, badminton and swimming. But like I say, we can’t be out all the time and I wish he could entertain himself at home without a screen!

He does have limits on gaming (max 3hrs a day weekends and holidays)

Is he unusual or is this common for his sort of age? He’s nearly 12 and about to go into yr7.

If all the tech had been available when we were young we’d have been the same. It’s addictive.

Just to say with Warhammer, you don't HAVE to paint them and you can buy pre used / painted ones in eBay. If you think he'd like the game elements, take him down to the local shop if you have one (just called Warhammer now, used to be Games Workshop) ..they run sessions to teach people how to play. Could also look for your nearest Gaming cafe like Geek Retreat ..there's lots of stuff in that "world" like D&D and card games that encourage creativity and teamwork. My DS was / is exactly the same as yours. A bit of fitness and football here and there, board games as a family but not much else.

He has dyspraxia so also struggles with things like lego etc and drawing is out of the question.
Mine does too, usually DC2 builds for him and he plays with it. Drawing totally out of the question here but he loves colouring in (large pictures aimed at younger children). Also sticker by number books.

We've also had some success with giving him a young kids basic how to draw book with his favourite animal in it and telling him to practice learning how to draw that one animal. And teaching him how to use tracing paper or to stick a printout on the window to trace over. He was so proud he'd finally managed to draw something complicated that looked like it should!

My ds is also awaiting assessment for dyspraxia! He ticks every box, I’m sure he has it - we’ve been waiting 18 months so far though and no end to the waiting list in sight!

I have bought help to draw books before but again he just isn’t interested. To be fair, even when he was little he was never that bothered about colouring or drawing so at least he’s been consistent.

Mine combines screens and activities. He's often following a TikTok/Youtube tutorial for some recipes. Absolutely loves cooking and I don't need to really supervise as luckily no gas hob to blow us all up with. Also likes doing Youtube exercise vids as he's got into this idea of calisthenics/being strong and flexible.

This will not be what you want to hear, but drums. DH plays so I'm used to it though.

Reading is big, I get him to do things in the garden, this year has been growing tomatoes, peppers and herbs. Want to try him with mushrooms.

Tbh, he does love gaming though and I think if he's getting enough fresh air and sleep I'm fine with it being his main hobby.

And mine! Draws very reluctantly and can’t really do it without the how to draw type books/tutorials. Which makes me a bit sad as I loves drawing when I was his age.

Drawing, basketball hoop, organising his room… he can still spend quite a long time batting a balloon around too 🤣.
but mainly it’s YouTube or gaming. Mainly YouTube

Does reading have to be saved till bedtime? We take my 11 year old to the library every few weeks and he loads up on books and would read all day if I let him.

He does puzzles (at the moment I think 1000 piece are still a good challenge but not so Gard he gives up, plus I make sure they're themed something he's interested in like Pokemon or Stat Wars) and enjoys making elaborate setups with things like marble runs/Gravitrax/Georello. We got him his own GoPro-type camera and he makes little stop-motion type movies with his toys and also films himself doing trick shots (that takes ages because to get one solid video of a trick shot he has to try about 152 times).

He's not particularly athletic or dextrous, but we did get him a hoverboard which only uses indoors at the moment, but he is quite enjoying getting the hang of it (even if it's driving me mad when he's underfoot all the time).

He also really enjoys single-player brain puzzle type games like SmartGames' IQ Puzzler or Diamond Quest or Grizzly Gears.

@ToThineOwnSelfBe when I say reading is at bedtime that’s his choice - he’s free to read anytime he likes!

No worries, I was just curious.

Does he read comic books or graphic novels? That moved DC2 from being a sometimes reader toward being more of an anytime reader.

The other thing DC1 has just gotten into is crossword puzzles and sudoku. He needs a little help with the crossword puzzles, but he's really into maths, so the sudoku keeps him occupied really well if he's in the mood for it.

He reads just regular books. He’s an excellent reader and used to be similar to your ds - we could go once a week to the library, bring back 12 books and he’d have read them in a week! He seems to swing between reading A LOT, and just reading a little bit before going to sleep and at the moment he’s in the latter phase - I don’t want to push him because I don’t want to turn him off reading at all which is usually what happens if I try too much to encourage him to do something 🙄

he also enjoys sudoku but not at home for some reason!

Is now 13 but I would say. Rubicks cubes. Reading. Playing guitar. Gravitrax. Sorting Yugioh cards. Cooking. Listening to music. Drawing, sketching manga type characters and then using brush pens to colour. Using paint pens to a large preprinted colouring canvas. 1000 piece puzzle on the kitchen table, where everyone does a bit. Board games like Catan, scrabble, monopoly. Card games.

Playing with the dog and the chickens, trampoline.
Bike rides
Going to the park/shop at the end of the road to meet a friend and play on their bikes or with remote controlled cars
magnetic dart board
toy planes/cars (occasionally - used to be all the time)
watching plane documentaries with DH
loves YouTube and gaming on his PC with his friends (plane games all the time!)

.

My 11 year old is exactly the same. If left to entertain himself (which I largely do), he games or is on his laptop all day. He does about 50 versions of wordle, plays online chess etc but not everything he does is educational, he watches loads of YouTube and plays FIFA or Roblox.

He collects football cards so he sometimes organises them. We have a gym at home so he works out, bike, treadmill, weights. He loves walking but generally only comes with me when I suggest it.
He loves football but only plays when it's his team practice or a match. He will play card games me with but again only if I suggest it. He also only really reads at bedtime.

Your post could have been me posting. I wouldn't worry too much. I think they need the downtime. My son has spent his primary school years in school for 7:30-5:30 every day. The kid needs a rest and I'm happy for him to choose how to do that.

My just turned 12 year old with play basketball for hours outside. Is that something he would be interested in? He will do home workouts, watch movies , game. My 10 year old will draw for hours , chat with friends, read , watch movies. I encourage them to come for a dog walk with them. They also enjoy baking/ cooking.

Don't know wether it's all ready been said, but mine loved making his own comic books, you can buy books set out ready to make your own. He's taught him self the ukulele and keyboard
Would he do the older versions of Lego? Bit more complicated

Mine is exactly the same! Won't entertain the idea of picking up a pencil 😂

I’d cut the screen down to an hour a day max. For my child I’d ban them entirely, but that will draw cries of child cruelty on here.

They’re addictive and as you can see, make other activities seem dull as the brain isn’t getting the stimulation from the quickly changing, bright images on the screen.

I have three kids and have never allowed screens in bedrooms or at the dinner table or when others are about. I’ve never brought any of them screens before secondary school although my youngest, who is 11, has a switch he can use plugged into the main family tv once a week. As they’ve never had much access to screens they have never struggled to find alternatives to screens for amusement.

I am not saying that to be smug but I am pointing it out because I’m amazed by how long many people let their kids spend on screens before saying they wished their kids had other interests. They won’t because screens are addictive. We are all on this app so we know that!

My kid (9) is absolutely the same and has motor skills on account of his ASD.

I've ended up leaning into the screen thing and I'm trying to teach him to touch-type as he has Dysgraphia and can barely write and school are leaning towards letting him use a laptop for schoolwork. There's some (free) typing games on the internet. We've been using Dance Mat typing but there are others.

Mine is really into the bbq and cooking steak. He spends ages researching cooking techniques, getting the ingredients etc and then trying them out.

Responding to your post in case it freaks out other parents who have children who have been allowed "too much" screen time.

Both my adult DCs (now early 20s) had far more screen time than your children. Both were awarded full tuition scholarships at their respective universities. They're still playing online games with their friends of an evening when they're not out partying but they're also being recruited as peer tutors and research assistants, despite being totally Minecraft and YouTube obsessed as tweens/teens. Balance is key. They did a lot of outdoor stuff too, but if they wanted to spend time hours just chilling out on screens, watching Spongebob or playing Minecraft, that was as valid a choice as any other activity.

Forgot to reply to the OP 😄

Has he ever shown any interest in chess? DC2 was really into playing chess from about age 8 and he still loves it now that he's away at university, although he mostly plays online now, rather than across a physical chess board. He's also been utterly obsessed with playing and watching basketball for a similar length of time.

DC1 has always been much more into reading and cooking/baking (and is still, at mid twenties.)

Yes he’s very good at chess and often beats me 😬 But as with pretty much everything else that’s not a screen he has to be ‘persuaded’ into playing.