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Original poster

What would you expect a 16 year old to pay for?

73 replies

PabloFlowerface · 28/07/2023 17:29

My 16 year old has just got a job which will be paying him £550 a month.

I currently pay ..

£100 pocket money a month
£70 gym a month
£30 contacts lenses a month
£80 college lunches / drinks a month

Plus of course his clothes and all the other bits and pieces they need and want at this age.

I can afford this and we are comfortable but I do 'notice' it. I do feel it sometimes!

So .. what would be reasonable for him to take over? I don't want to be 'mean' but I also don't want to create a situation where he has more disposable income than me.

I suppose I'm saying I want him to start slowly finding his way with all of this and to begin budgeting etc

I'm thinking of still paying for his contacts lenses and his clothes (but he can now pick up the cost of the expensive football shirts he likes!) and he can now pay for his gym membership and his treat food (to be clear, we always have loads of food he could take to college at home so buying stuff out is a bit of a luxury)

Anyway.. thoughts? What would you do if this was you?

OP posts:

Original poster

PabloFlowerface · 28/07/2023 21:04

@strongcupofTea you're aware that different people have different lifestyles and different incomes yes?!

I pay what I do because I can afford to and I want to and it works for me

OP posts:

Original poster

PabloFlowerface · 28/07/2023 21:05

@strongcupofTea it isn't 11.40 an hour. It's 10.50 an hour. £126 a week. £546 a month

Seems like maths isn't your strong point

OP posts:

Original poster

PabloFlowerface · 28/07/2023 21:06

@strongcupofTea sorry you're so bitter that someone had a different lifestyle to you. How weird

OP posts:

Original poster

PabloFlowerface · 28/07/2023 21:07

@MargaretThursday He has been wanting to work for a while now but obviously not possible really until now so yes, I'd continue to pay what I do until he secured a job. Wasn't too concerned about that though as he was always going to get something

OP posts:

Lira715 · 28/07/2023 21:08

I’d let him pay for gym and put the pocket money into savings for him.

MrsElf · 28/07/2023 21:42

I would actually keep the pocket money going. Maybe add some “towards lunches and clothes” (although I’d probably say £50 rather than the £80, especially if he could easily take a packed lunch). And then say ALL clothes and snacks and socialising etc are on him. I bet it will still work out far cheaper for you! And he won’t feel like you’re taking away from his earnings - look, you’re giving him more! I would insist on some into savings towards his driving lessons, and overseeing the budget for the first couple of months, though.

daffodilandtulip · 28/07/2023 21:50

I make my 17yo pack lunches, she buys any extras she wants and I put money on her account for a treat Costa (cheap in college) each week. I pay for her new glasses annually and we have a connected/deal gym membership together that I pay for. I buy college books, stationary, bags. She buys her own clothes and I don't give her pocket money.

LadyGaGasPokerFace · 28/07/2023 21:52

My pocket money stopped as soon as I was working pt as a student. I paid for my own driving lessons at 17, my clothes, make up, food at college etc.
No gym membership, he can pay that himself. I’d pay for his contacts.

discardedBox · 28/07/2023 21:57

Pay for his lenses and lunches, he pays for gym and put his pocket money into a savings account for him.

googledidnthelp · 28/07/2023 22:05

I would be tempted to save his pocket money for him towards his driving lessons without telling him. Then if you need any of it you've got it and if you don't and you feel he has managed his money well then he will be delighted and deserving of the help towards lessons without it being a big expense at the time.

2023recession · 28/07/2023 23:36

Very similar considerations for me!
my DD has been earning £400 a month over the summer holidays.
I stopped her pocket money (£15 a week)
i still pay her contacts (£33)
I pay her train fare to college (£100 a month)
I used to buy clothes etc. if I considered them necessary ie coat, shoes, stuff she neede/grown out of. Not another tiny top or fashion buy or unnecessary expensive label (although I didn’t mind paying for good quality).

I was considered restarting her pocket money in September as I expect she will only do 1x 7 hour shift a week.

Clymene · 28/07/2023 23:39

Wow. You give him way more than I give my 16 year old

TheUsualChaos · 28/07/2023 23:44

Good idea saving the pocket money for driving lessons. Costs a fortune now.

I would carry on paying for the contacts and some clothes. But anything particularly expensive or unnecessary can come from his wages. The gym I would definitely stop paying for! Would also cut the lunch budget in half as well, he can fund at least part of it...might even encourage him to go for more economical options..he could always make sandwiches 🤔🤣

MuchTooTired · 28/07/2023 23:46

I got my pocket money (£40pw) and whatever I earned from work when I was his age, and only had to run my mobile and petrol. Oh, and socialising. Gradually I covered the car insurance and maintenance of it.

I frequently tell my Dad I’ve never been as minted as I was when I was a teenager, and I wish to identify as a teenager again and collect my pocket money whilst forwarding him my bill’s ta.

Chichimcgee · 28/07/2023 23:49

I’d stop pocket money and ask him to contribute £50/£100 a month.
save it up for him and to reward his budgeting and responsibility you can help him with driving and car or towards his first house etc

jolaylasofia · 29/07/2023 00:14

i would stop pocket money but nothing else as it would mean he's losing a big chunk of his wages from the off.

JemimaTiggywinkles · 29/07/2023 00:50

I'd stop the pocket money and pay everything else. If you can easily afford it, tell him you'll match any money he puts into savings up to the £100 per month. That way he'll still be up £350 in spends, but he'll learn to save a chunk each month right from the off.

DumpedByText · 29/07/2023 01:24

My DD is 16 and currently gets £50 a month pocket money. In September she'll also get EMA of £160 a month for college.

I've told her she has to pay her train fair (£2.60) daily, she's only in college 3 days, and lunch if she doesn't want to take stuff from home out of the £210 she'll have monthly.

I'll continue to pay for her phone and buy some clothes.

I certainly wouldn't be paying £70 gym membership if he's getting £500 a month!

Cucumber1234 · 29/07/2023 02:28

Have you spoken to him about it?

Sit down with him about the current expenses, and how much it comes to. Explain that he has £550 a month coming in. And what you both think it needs to cover.

So that he can understand your thinking, and you can understand his. You can come to a compromise.

Id probably say stop the £100 pocket money, he can put £100 a month savings too. Then has £450 for his extras. So his extras he uses pocket money for, will all come out of his £450.

Explain that he needs to think about things in advance too. What he may need that month. Ask him if he wants help budgeting or setting a weekly budget. Talk through the costs of things. The downside to getting into debt, about not lending money out etc. Basically a general lesson on finances and budgeting. And maybe tell him not to tell his friends what hes earning.

whiteroseredrose · 30/07/2023 09:07

I agree, I would stop the pocket money. Mine stopped when I got a job too because it was plenty. I'd definitely still pay for contact lenses and medical type things. Not sure about the gym. Mine go for a run and have weights at home so not really an essential.

Mine are at university and I still pay for optician and dentist expenses. And I still pay for phones.

At 16 I would still buy everyday clothes for college. Any luxuries can be bought from wages.

Happygerbil · 30/07/2023 09:11

I'd consider halving the pocket money rather than stopping it completely

IheartNiles · 30/07/2023 09:16

I can’t believe people are telling op to continue pocket money. Her child has £550 disposable income. Not many adults have that and op certainly doesn’t!

Op I would stop the pocket money and maybe the gym (at least go halves). I’ve barely given DD any money since she started working a few years ago. It teaches them the value of money and budgeting.

Serena73 · 30/07/2023 09:18

I would stop giving him pocket money and I would expect him to buy his own clothes- he has more than enough for that! I would still pay for the contact lenses and food, and also phone
contract which he isn’t old enough for anyway.

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