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Original poster

Which man would you choose?

77 replies

Logg · 27/07/2023 06:43

Man A

  • Good looking, sexy, a bit rough around the edges, funny, laid back and relaxed, very thoughtful, confident, generous, great with kids, nans, anyone really, a real people person. Great in bed.
  • can be too laid back at times, jobwise- low to average pay, not very romantic, well can be but in his own way.

Man B

  • He has a very good job £££, works in tech, a bit geeky in an endearing way, kind and thoughtful, funny, romantic, great in bed.
  • not very confident as Man 1, a bit socially awkward at times, can get a bit stressed / annoyed over small things, possibly a bit stingy with money but not overly so but can't be too sure yet.

B is more my "type" but I really really like A but I'm worried im just infatuated with him and it will wear off. B is more the guy you probably would settle down with and A you'd have fun with.

OP posts:
ringsaglitter · 27/07/2023 07:58

A

ringsaglitter · 27/07/2023 07:58

coodawoodashooda · 27/07/2023 07:56

Agreed

Show quote history

What's a 'cocklodger'?

MissingOkie · 27/07/2023 08:00

Spoilt for choice here OP

🤣🤣🤣

I think neither sound great to settle down with if that’s what you’re looking for? Maybe keep dating both and having fun as long each one knows you’re not exclusively dating them.

MardaNorton · 27/07/2023 08:00

C1N1C · 27/07/2023 07:54

I wouldn't be sleeping with two people at the same time, but that's just me.

I think if you can do this, you're not serious about either.

But why does she have to serious about either? As long as everyone knows she's not seeing either of them exclusively, and everyone is taking care to use barrier methods in bed, why shouldn't she continue to see both in order to know each one better?

Though I agree with pps in principle that you don't sound that engaged by either if you are listing their pros and cons as if they were used cars you were taking for a test drive...

What does 'rough around the edges' mean in this context? And I'm not sure I particularly like the sound of Guy B, either -- if you've not been seeing him long, and he already strikes you as stingy and liable to get stressed and annoyed by small stuff.

Justleaveitblankthen · 27/07/2023 08:06

Morewineplease10 · 27/07/2023 07:11

Bloke A for short term.

B for nothing. Stinging is horrible characteristic and is indicative of traits/behavior that go way deeper than splashing the cash.

Agree with this.
Stingy with money often means selfish in all other ways.
Huge turn off.

On the other hand, I wouldn't be sharing joint finances with the first bloke 🤔

Alighttouchonthetiller · 27/07/2023 08:10

Stay single and enjoy yourself.

Gateappreciation · 27/07/2023 08:11

Neither. If you ca’t decide, neither is right.

crocodileindenial · 27/07/2023 08:11

A

Brk · 27/07/2023 08:12

Do have a listen to the song “Angels and Devils the following day” by Dory Previn…
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=EOC7LCXQpGc

Dory Previn- Angels and Devils The Following Day

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=EOC7LCXQpGc

OnlyFoolsnMothers · 27/07/2023 08:12

Neither!

Nicoal · 27/07/2023 08:12

Neither - keep looking

DidyouNO · 27/07/2023 08:14

I don't know but I will say absolutely no to 'man B'. Gets annoyed over small things??. Massive red flag for me. I do admit I carry scars from a previous abusive marriage but I'd run a mile. If he's 'annoyed' now when he doesn't know you chances are he'll have the confidence to be full on angry when he does know you better.

GarlicGrace · 27/07/2023 08:22

A.

Already had enough snappy & stingy to last several lifetimes. If I were living with someone again, I would definitely prioritise "pleasure to spend time with" over "stressed & irritable".

RedHelenB · 27/07/2023 08:32

Nothingbuttheglory · 27/07/2023 06:49

If I couldn't choose between them I don't like either of them enough.

This.

AngelinaFibres · 27/07/2023 08:36

Never marry someone you can live with. Only marry someone you simply can't live without. Neither A nor B fit into that. Look for C

ChocolateyCrunch · 27/07/2023 08:38

C. Definitely C.

DuckyShincracker · 27/07/2023 08:41

100% A, very like my Dp they make great partners as they have so much empathy.

ifonly4 · 27/07/2023 08:47

I think I'd chose A, based on the fact I have two friends who married socially awkward men who over the years have shied away from social functions. One does go to family dos, but not social occasions with friends. The other won't even get together with family now!

lordloveadog · 27/07/2023 11:02

Do you want to breed with either of them? If so, B sounds doubtful. Stress and stinginess not good in a new father. But would A step up and take on half the responsibilities?

If not wanting to reproduce, then A sounds more fun. Do you have similar ideas about lifestyle, holidays?

SoupDragon · 27/07/2023 11:42

If you have to ask strangers to choose for you then it's most likely "neither".

mindutopia · 27/07/2023 11:44

I think if it's not obvious, then probably neither are right for you.

But simply looking at the negatives, the negatives for A would be a more cut and dry dealbreaker. I wouldn't want a relationship with anyone who wasn't on the same level of me in terms of ambition and work ethic, all other things being equal.

hev126 · 27/07/2023 11:48

Nothingbuttheglory · 27/07/2023 06:49

If I couldn't choose between them I don't like either of them enough.

This!!!

From reading your descriptions, I'd much rather be with A.
However if I had A in my life and was still considering another option and couldn't make up my mind I'd conclude neither were right for me.

I don't believe in love at first sight but I'm a string believer that if you've met someone and like them enough your interest in anyone else would soon fade

everybodytidy · 27/07/2023 12:04

Man B

hev126 · 27/07/2023 12:10

I'm surprised by the amount of people saying man B over man A. Is this down to income??

Catspyjamas17 · 27/07/2023 12:11

A but don't move in with him or marry him unless you are in alignment about attitudes to money, kids, pets and housework.

One thing that also first turned my head with DH was that he was respected and liked at work - people spoke so highly of him. And he went all soppy about small animals and children.